You Will Find Joy
by Efia-an
Summary: PART ONE. SLASH. Haldir is in love with Legolas, but Legolas is tied up in running his father's kingdom while Thranduil is mysteriously ill. Can Legolas return Haldir's love despite his sense of duty to the kingdom and Thranduil's extreme homophobia?
1. At First Glance

_Title: _You Will Find Joy

_Author: _Efia-an

_Rating: _M

_Summary: _This story is going to be in two or perhaps three parts (that's yet to be determined). As a whole, it is an epic tale covering hundreds of years, starting with Haldir's first visit to Mirkwood where he falls quite suddenly and deeply in love with Legolas. Can the prince return his feelings, despite his father's terrible homophobia? Or years later when war threatens will duty to Middle-earth and Legolas's unspoken feelings for Aragorn rip them apart? This story occurs before and concurrent to the events of The Lord of the Rings. This story contains **SLASH. **

_Pairings:_ Haldir/Legolas, Aragorn/Arwen, and implied Legolas/Aragorn in later chapters.

_Warnings: _This story may contain some elements of **AU **as is needed for the story to flow, but it will follow the books and/or movies fairly closely. It also contains **SLASH**. If you have a problem with this, please push your back button now. That's why it was invented. You read this of your own free will (unless someone is holding you down and torturing you into submission; if that is the case, I suggest you have larger worries to deal with than my pairings). Also, while there is plenty of good and happy stuff in this story, I am but a slave to bittersweet or even occasionally tragic. Not all my work has one or both of these elements, but this particular story does. (But if you've seen the movies, you also should see some of what is coming! Blame Peter Jackson, not me, if you have a problem with Haldir's death!) If this does not appeal to you, I suggest you find some other story to read; I would argue, however, that this story does end happily (or bittersweetly, depending on your view). You have been warned.

_Disclaimer_: While I wish I could claim any of The Lord of the Rings for my own, that is sadly not the case. I own none of the characters created by J.R.R. Tolkien. They are legally owned by Tolkien and his estate and to Peter Jackson, et al.

_A/N:_ This story overlaps with the timeline of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. I've taken the liberty of combining elements of both the books and the movies to suit my needs, so please be aware of that. Primarily I follow the books, but Haldir and the elves do show up at Helm's Deep as in the movie. There may be some other minor adaptations, but that is the main one you must be aware of.

One final note: Reviews are fine, whether they are of encouragement or _constructive_ criticism (I am sure there are many of you who are much more familiar with these books and movies than I am; I will gladly accept any corrections of mistakes I may make), but **NO FLAMES** are allowed. I suggest that if you have nothing better to do with your life than to flame other people's work, you need a new hobby. They will not be welcomed here.

And now, finally (and the crowds cheer), on to the story:

_It was a fine day for being out on the water. The sun was high in the cloudless sky above them and a slight breeze tickled the necks of the River Folk who were out enjoying the day. Déagol looked sunward and inhaled a deep breath of air, allowing it to fill his lungs and his entire body with a sense of well being. A perfect day. A day when the line between the possible and impossible seemed to vanish and only the limits of imagination would confine the extraordinary. Today was a day for adventures to happen, if they were to happen at all. Exhaling grandly, Déagol started to shout out to Sméagol on the shore but just then a rather strong tug on his fishing line surprised him. "Hey! Hey!" he called loudly. "I think I got one!"_

_Looking up from his burrowing, Sméagol was just in time to see his friend pulled forcibly from the boat and with a large splash that sent water streaming up onto the shore, Déagol disappeared from sight. A bird chirped high overhead and the world seemed to pause, waiting for something to happen. A moment later he saw Déagol reemerge, his hand clenched in a fist. After swimming to shore, he crawled up on the bank and slowly opened his hand. Unable to see what it was that his companion had in his hand, Sméagol crept up behind his friend. A ring lay there, unmarked yet perfectly round and shining golden in the sun. It filled Sméagol's senses so that he felt fit to burst. An overpowering urge to claim that ring for himself came over him._

"_Give us that, Déagol, my love," Sméagol half-whispered in his ear, startling Déagol out of his reverence, for he had no thought of the existence of anything else but the ring._

"_Why?" asked Déagol defiantly._

"_Because it's my birthday, my love, and I wants it."_

"_I don't care," replied Déagol. "I have given you a present already, more than I could afford. I found this, and I'm going to keep it."_

"_Oh, are you indeed, my love," answered Sméagol with hauteur and loathing in his voice. Without thinking, without hesitation or remorse, he wrapped his long fingers around his friend's throat until he felt the life leave him. Prying open the protective fist that Déagol had once more clenched Sméagol took the ring. Caressing it lovingly he slipped it on his finger and disappeared from sight._

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The sun rose unusually early and bright the morning Haldir of the Galadrim first arrived at the castle of Thranduil in Mirkwood. Long had he traveled, seeking news of his kindred. A shadow had fallen in the north and whispered stirrings of an Enemy had come to his people in Lothlórien. As one of the few of his kind who spoke the Common Tongue, he had been chosen by the Lord and Lady of the wood as one of only a half dozen to go abroad, bringing word of the outside world back to their land. With him traveled his two brothers Rúmil and Orophin who, while unfamiliar with the Common Tongue, were among the most trusted of Haldir's companions. By the time Haldir reached Mirkwood, he had been away from home for nearly a year, first traveling south through the Gap of Rohan and then north along the Greenway to learn of his kin in the north before heading east towards Rivendell.

Rivendell had been a welcome reprieve from the road. The waters that ran through the land were cool and crisp, laughing merrily as they danced across the riverbed. The land was green and alive and a sense of deep contentedness could be felt in the trees. As much as Haldir enjoyed being out in the world, he embraced the cleansing that Rivendell afforded him. All the toils of the road and uneasiness of Eriador seemed to fall off him once he entered Elrond Half-elven's domain. There he found welcome surrounding him in the trees and coming up from the very earth beneath and sky above him.

Elrond, too, was glad to see him, and his reception into his house was gladly received. Four months he stayed, renewing his friendship with Elrond and Arwen Evenstar. Long had it been since he had last seen Arwen; not since her visit to Lórien many years prior. Longer still was it that Haldir had seen Elrond, for as much as Haldir enjoyed visiting Rivendell, he enjoyed being with his own Galadhrim amidst the mallorn trees even more. Nothing tasted as sweet as one's own home, although visiting among long-absent friends was almost as rewarding. So when at last it came time to depart, he bid his friends a fond farewell with a promise to return soon.

Haldir admitted freely to himself that perhaps the reason he tarried so long in Rivendell was less to do with spending time with his kin and more to do with a great deal of reluctance towards crossing over the mountain pass and into the less hospitable land of Mirkwood. For here orcs and giant spiders and other dark creatures lived which never entered his land. And while Haldir, marchwarden of Lothlórien, was indeed a seasoned warrior, he had no desire to encounter such foes with so few in his party. Additionally, he did not hope for warm reception into this land where his kindred were isolated in so dark a region.

True to his suspicions, the first of the Mirkwood Elves that Haldir met were in fact on sentry duty. Upon recognizing their own, however, the guards' wary aggression soon turned to welcome. For this Haldir was deeply gratified, and upon learning of Haldir's journey the guards quickly arranged for an armed escort to take him and his two companions to the cavernous castle of Thranduil. There he had opportunity to wash the stain of travel away before coming before King Thranduil.

"Welcome, Haldir of the Galadhrim." Thranduil greeted his guest formally. "It is a great honor that you grace us with your presence. I hope all is well with Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel as well as the rest of your people."

Haldir bowed. "I thank you for your kind words of welcome and am pleased to inform you that all is well in Lórien. My Lord and Lady send their greetings to you as well." He replied in equal civility.

"What brings you so far north to seek an audience with me?" questioned Thranduil. "Long has it been since we have received visitors from your fair land."

Haldir smiled. "It is indeed too long since our people have sat together. And for this reason I have been sent: to learn of our kindred and hear news directly of these lands that hitherto have come to us only as rumors. I have traveled far, both in the land of Men and of Elves, to learn firsthand the fates of these peoples. There are whisperings of a great evil growing in the east and a shadow falling once again over Dol Guldur. It is time we reestablish the ties between our two lands and renew our friendship."

At this, Thranduil dropped all courtly formalities. Clasping Haldir firmly on the shoulder he broke out into a sad yet hospitable smile. "Haldir, you are most welcome here. There is much indeed to discuss and I would hear you tell of your travels. But come. We will sit together and discuss many things in the coming days. Right now, however, feel free to relax from your journey. Our realm is open to you, though I would not stray far from this castle, especially at night and alone. But it is early yet; perhaps being new to this land you would like a tour?"

Without waiting for a response Thranduil summoned an Elf who was standing in the corner. Introducing Haldir to his escort he said, "This is Meldiron. He would be pleased to take you through our land and to show you wherever else you would like to visit. You shall return this evening, however, for a welcoming feast for you and your companions."

Haldir acknowledged this with a gracious bow and some wonder at this announcement. While he was a messenger of Lothlórien, he never expected to be treated with such novelty by his own kind. Not wanting to sound ungrateful, Haldir was careful choosing his next words. "My lord, we are most gratified by such a generous offer and we thank you for it. However, a feast is unnecessary. We come only to renew our ties with you and your people."

Thranduil smiled at Haldir. "And what better way to start than a great banquet? I assure you, it will be a joyous time for all." Before Haldir could object, Thranduil pressed on. "Come. Tonight we will meet again as friends and we can speak again then. Until then, I hope you enjoy seeing more of our lands." With that, he motioned for Meldiron to escort Haldir out of his throne room. "Farewell for now, Haldir of Lothlórien."

And with Thranduil's words still ringing in his ears, Haldir left with Meldiron to get his first real exposure to the elven lands of Mirkwood.

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Later that evening as he was getting ready for the welcoming feast, Haldir reflected on his day. Mirkwood was not quite what he expected. Long had he heard tales of the darkness that clung to the forest like a living shroud, and while he knew that wood elves did in fact live there, he somehow did not expect the Elvenking's realm to be as fair as it was. _'Nay, not fair,' _he corrected himself mentally, _'just not as ominous.'_ Indeed Mirkwood was gloomy night to Lothlórien's golden day, and Haldir had no desire to explore the forest beyond the area that the Elves inhabited; but no place, not even Mirkwood, could be entirely evil so long as the Elves still lived there. Beyond the range of the healing presence of his kin, however, Mirkwood was truly a sinister place. He could see the shadow hanging over Dol Guldur even from his own lands and he felt the oppression that only evil can bring as he passed through Mirkwood on his journey through the forest. The anger and suspicion of the trees was practically tangible and unwelcoming even to the Elf, for he was unknown to them.

Haldir shuddered at the memory. While the mistrust of all things that walked about on two legs was still present even within Thranduil's kingdom, Haldir also felt the underlying peace that his people had brought to the land. Still, he knew of the dangers that still lurked in the area. Thank Eru for his mercy in placing Haldir in the Laurelindórinan with the Lord and Lady Celborn and Galadriel! He never felt as truly blessed as he did in that moment. Let the Mirkwood Elves keep their kingdom and their stories of Lothlórien that would never do it justice (even in their fair tongue); Haldir for one could imagine no earthly reason for him to linger in this place for longer than was absolutely necessary to complete his mission.

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The Upper Hall where the feast was to be held was bright with the evanescent glow of elvish lanterns that danced upon the walls, illuminating the _mithril_ that was imbedded therein. Such ornamentation filled the room with a sense of being out under a night sky bejeweled with millions of stars which twinkled brightly. In this setting Haldir almost felt as though the air was fresh and full of green and growing things. It would never be the same as being out of doors, of course, but thanks in large part to the long ago and nearly forgotten mining of the Dwarves, the Elves had managed to create in their caves a feeling of homeliness in the depths of the earth.

In the front of the room was a long table draped in the finest fabric the Elves could produce. It shimmered grey and silver in the glow of the room and upon it were set many covered silver platters of varying sizes that gleamed in the ethereal light. Throughout the rest of the room, smaller tables were scattered bedecked in a similar fashion. All in all, it had the appearence of a long planned, greatly anticipated event. Haldir was amazed that so grand a reception was prepared for them and in so short a time.

"Haldir!" a glad voice called from behind. Turning, Haldir saw King Thrandiul standing a few paces off with his arms stretched open in welcome, his smile reaching to his eyes. "Welcome! Rúmil, Orophin, I bid you all welcome! Come, sit at my table and dine with us." Beckoning to his servants, he motioned to them to escort Haldir and his brothers to their places.

Haldir found himself ushered to a seat between Orophin and another Elf he did not know. There were five seats on each side of the table with Thranduil at the head. At the other end of the table another place setting was set, but there was no one present to claim that seat.

"Welcome, all, to this feast!" Thranduil spread his arms wide, somehow encompassing the entire room and all who were gathered there. "Before we begin, I would like to offer a special welcome to our cousins from the south, Haldir, Rúmil, and Orophin from Lothlórien. They shall be staying with us over the course of the next month or two. I bid you all to greet our honored guests and help them feel at home here. But I will not keep you waiting any longer, for our kitchen staff has outdone themselves on this repast. Please, sit!" With that final word, Thranduil himself sat down. The other Elves in the room followed suit. Presently the platters were unveiled to reveal rich meats, colorful fruits and vegetables, and many different types of bread. _'Apparently even in this dark wood the Elves are able to coax beauty from their gardens.' _Haldir thought to himself, feeling mildly amused. His thoughts were interrupted, however, by the Elf sitting at his right hand.

"Greetings," he said to Haldir, "My name is Daugion. Welcome to Mirkwood."

Haldir returned Daugion's greeting. "Thank you. The hospitality we have been shown so far has exceeded any expectations I might have had. Your welcome is keenly felt and deeply appreciated."

For a fleeting moment Haldir thought he saw a shadow darken Daugion's brow, but certainly he must have been mistaken for the other Elf's face lit up at Haldir's words. "Thank you," he replied. "We do not receive many visitors here. Once in a while we have a Ranger come through, but other than we do not entertain much. While we do enjoy news of the outside world, seldom do we see others of our own kind. Occasionally we receive messengers from Rivendell, but it has been a little while since the last one left. I understand you have just come from there."

' _Ah,' _thought Haldir to himself, _'that explains much. No wonder we were greeted so extravagantly; they have little occasion to celebrate!'_ Aloud he responded to Daugion's implied question,"Yes we have. My Lady Galadriel desired news of her granddaughter, so we stayed several months there."

"Ah, and how is fair Arwen? I have met her but once many years ago, though the memory stays fresh in my mind. Her beauty alone would cause me never to forget her, but her kindness lingers with me to this day."

"She is well," replied Haldir, "as is Lord Elrond. He was insistent that I send his greetings to the people of Mirkwood."

Daugion bowed his head slightly in acknowledgement. "And how do you find Mirkwood?" he questioned curiously. "It is, I am sure, not quite like your lands."

Haldir barked out an amused laugh. "No, indeed it is not. But it has its own dark beauty." He paused for a moment, trying to form his next words carefully so as not to create accidental insult to his newfound friend. "I have heard tales of this land, of course, and while I would personally not choose to live here, I am glad of the opportunity to visit and learn firsthand what life here is like. It may well prove different from all our tales in Lórien."

"Yes, I understand your meaning," answered Daugion, smiling. "It is a dark place to be sure and while we must always be on guard against what lurks here, Mirkwood is filled with its own rewards. During your stay I certainly hope you learn some of them."

"Indeed," smiled Haldir, feeling the sentiment residing deep within him. "I certainly hope so too."

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After the feasting was over the tables were cleared by the servants while the dinner party retired to a neighboring hall. A roaring fire had been set in the oversized stone fireplace which cast its warm glow over the entire room. While not as grand as the hall they had just left, Haldir found it to be quite comfortable, even cozy. There more Elves had already gathered, talking amongst themselves in small groups. Walking with Haldir Daugion pointed out several Elves who were in the same guard as he was.

"There, standing closest to the fireplace is Gondien. The one standing with him is Revion. He is one you might find interesting to talk with; he too often journeys beyond our borders. Only recently is he returned to Mirkwood after having spent some months in the South. I will have to introduce you at some point during your stay." Daugion said. Redirecting Haldir's attention to the other side of the room he started pointing out several more of his companions. Momentarily later, however, he was interrupted by the sound of otherworldly singing.

Leaning close to Haldir's ear Daugion said in a low voice as not to disturb the surrounding Elves, "Ah, and here is a real treat. Menelwen has chosen to begin the evening. It is said her voice could call the stars from their heavens in order to dance here on Arda amongst the twilit gardens bedecked with dew. We have not heard from her in a long while."

Haldir nodded. Already he was entranced. Never before had he heard such beauty in music. Her song wrapped her arms around him in a sweet embrace, holding him so close that he felt as if he could spend eternity lost in her music. Daugion seeing Haldir's wistful contentment smiled to himself and stepped back. Haldir did not notice. All he was aware of was the feel of the open air upon his cheek and the warm sunlight streaming down upon his head; the enchantment of her song.

Although Menelwen sang for many long minutes the song ended far too soon and Haldir suddenly felt almost cool, as if he had entered an unlit room after standing outside on a summer's day. Slowly he became aware of his surroundings once more as another singer started his song. Looking about him he saw a new Elf had discretely entered the room while he and the rest of the company there gathered were under Menelwen's spell. The Elf had his face turned away from Haldir, but something about him felt familiar, as if he had somehow known the other Elf from another lifetime.

As if the other Elf sensed Haldir's thoughts he turned and looked his way. In that moment Haldir was struck with an inability to speak. The room about him seemed to fade into the background and he could not help but stare. There before him was the most beautiful creature he had ever beheld: fairer than any other Elf that currently lived with eyes that seemed to reflect the inner light of the dancing fire and golden hair that captured all the warmth held in Middle-earth. Haldir felt as if all loveliness that ever was and ever would be were concentrated and was radiating from the bewitching Elf.

Unable to draw his gaze away from the Elf Haldir nudged the air near Daugion, unaware that he was missing his mark entirely. "Who is that new Elf, the one standing with Gondien and Revion?" he questioned hazily.

Daugion, seeing the transfixed wonder on Haldir's face, redirected his attention to the Elf in question. Had Haldir eyes for anyone else in the room he might have once again noticed the fleeting shadow darken his friend's face before he answered, but as it was he took no notice.

"That," Daugion responded, "is Legolas Thranduilion, prince of Mirkwood."

As if the sound of Daugion's voice suddenly roused him, Haldir felt a tingle that started in his toes and rushed to the top of his head. A roaring cacophony as of many rivers filled his ears and a heightened sense of awareness made him conscious that he was openly gawking. Quickly adverting his eyes, he turned his focus once more upon the singer, still aware of the beautiful Elf standing in the corner.

"_Legolas…" _Haldir breathed to himself, feeling like spring was taking root deep within his heart. This trip to Mirkwood if not already worthwhile had suddenly become even more so; having looked upon that which was most fair Haldir knew his life was never to be the same again.

To be continued…

_A/N: The dialogue between Sméagol and Déagol at the beginning of the chapter is taken word for word from The Fellowship of the Ring and belongs solely to Tolkien and his estate._

_Also, in case you were wondering about the names given: Meldiron means "friend," Daugion means "of the army," Gondien means "a rock," Revion means "to wander," and Menelwen means "heavenly."_


	2. The Responsibilities of a Prince

Prince Legolas of Mirkwood was in a rather foul mood. After the previous day's events and the morning he just had, Legolas felt justified in having a little pity-party, even if it was a bit undignified. Wanting to be alone, he started to head to the archery field to release some tension before realizing that if his father (or anyone else for that matter) were to go looking for him, the archery field would be the first place they would look. What Legolas needed was some space where he could work out all the pent-up aggression he was feeling. Perhaps it was time for him to build his own archery range; one that would be secret and only for him.

He sighed. As much as he dreamed of this luxury, Legolas knew it would never become a reality. He was the prince and such privileges as privacy could not be afforded him. Even were he to undertake this project, it would hardly stay secret for long. Someone was always with him or watching where he went or looking for him. No, in such times as these, it was better to slip off quietly into the woods where he might find an old stump or post to make a target of.

Decided, Legolas ran swiftly to his quarters, careful lest he run into anyone. Grabbing his bow and quiver full of arrows, he left the castle and choosing an aimless direction he disappeared among the trees. As he marched he kept an eye out for anything that would suit his purpose. The trees, however, were dense and thick so that no matter what he may have found to be a suitable target, there was always some obstacle between it and a reasonable shooting distance.

Frustrated Legolas scowled, his dark mood growing ever blacker. _'Stupid trees,' _he thought, momentarily forgetting that he was their friend and setting his will against them. All he wanted was a private place not too far away from the castle where he could release a few arrows undisturbed.

As if the forest knew his thoughts he came suddenly into a small clearing. Trees lined the space like a protective wall and there on the far side from where he stood was a tall tree with a knot in the center, as if it were waiting for Legolas. The tree had been long dead and the wood was soft and crumbling; the victim of rot and termites and woodpeckers.

Pursing his lips into a grim but satisfied smile, Legolas lost no time in notching his arrow and letting it fly. With a _swoosh _and _thud_, it landed in the very center of the knot where it was joined shortly by a second, third, and fourth. Arrow after arrow flew through the air, some not even reaching the target before it was followed by another. Not until his abundant quiver was empty did Legolas pause. Only then did he even begin to be aware of his surroundings or his own thoughts. Retrieving his arrows to refill his quiver to begin his next round of shots Legolas finally allowed the memory of that morning's conversation with Daugion to return to him.

"_Legolas, you are the prince of Mirkwood!" Daugion said in exaggerated exasperation. "You do not have the privilege of just taking off for an entire day like that with no word to anybody. With your title come the responsibilities tied to the crown. You of all people should know this! You are not at liberty to do as you please whenever it pleases you without even the common courtesy of letting those who are concerned for you know where you will be. You owe us that at the very least."_

"_I told you. I was detained." Legolas replied. "I did not know of this feast until afterwards."_

"_Well, that wasn't for lack of trying to find you," retorted Daugion. "Your father had many of us out looking for you. Instead of greeting our guests as we should have we had to go out hunting for a runaway prince."_

"_I was not a 'runaway prince', as you call it. I—"_

"_I don't care to hear your excuse!" interrupted Daugion explosively, "Imagine my chagrin last night when our guest commended me on how great our hospitality here in Mirkwood is and right next to me was the vacant chair that should have been occupied by the crowned prince – You!"_

_Legolas turned to look away from Daugion. "You sound just like my father," he said evenly with cool anger in his voice._

"_Well if I do it's only for your good." Daugion answered defiantly. "If you won't listen to him, maybe you'll listen to me. Have I not been your friend these many years?"_

_Legolas felt both the urge to sneer and laugh aloud come over him simultaneously. Not entirely able to keep either from showing his emotions he let out a derisive snort instead. "Have you?" he questioned. "In the past few years you've done nothing but coddle or chastise me. You are more my father's friend than mine." He paused for a brief second, taking a deep breath to reign in his temper. In a quiet even voice that hinted insult he added, "They should call you not Daugion but Aransadorien."_

"_Well, if all I am is 'devoted to the king', there are worse traits for me to have." Daugion retorted._

"_Yes!" Legolas snapped, his eyes flashing. "There are! Such as disloyalty, impatience, arrogance, and false wisdom, all of which you seem to have in recent abundance." Daugion's mouth fell slightly open at this, as if ready to protest. Before he could, however, Legolas continued. "I already have one father. I don't need another, especially one who grew up with me, played with me, learned with me, shared secrets with me; we were practically brothers, Daugion! And now you've sold me out," he spat._

_Daugion was unprepared for such uncharacteristic accusations from Legolas. For a moment he was unsure how to respond._ _Then, as if unbidden the thought that flitted to his mind left his mouth. "Well, that was before we became adults and I grew older than you," he retorted cruelly._

"_Older than me?" Legolas cried incredulously. "_Older _than me? If you spent half the time you spend now buttering up my father as you once did being my friend, maybe then you would listen to reason! I don't know when I fell out of your favor, but it's hard enough keeping my father's as it is. I don't have time to continually seek your approval as well." Legolas concluded, turning to leave._

_Trying one last time to get Legolas to come around, Daugion called after him. "Your father loves you, Legolas, as do I, my brother. He only demands from you what a father and king ought. I have only your best interests at heart."_

_Legolas slowly turned around and stalked back to Daugion, his fists clenched at his sides and his jaw set. "I," he began in a dangerously low voice, "do not need you to look after me," he said slowly, articulating each syllable carefully and slowly to drive his point home. "As it is, I have already spoken to the king and he has granted me pardon. I do not ask for it from you. I do not need it from you. It is not yours to give." With that Legolas turned and walked from the room, unheeding Daugion's cries of 'Legolas! _Legolas!_' to recapture the prince's attention._

Legolas smirked at the memory. He had not realized how overbearing his friend had become until this morning. True, he had noticed from time to time how Daugion would take the side of his father over himself, but somehow Legolas had always managed to explain away his friend's altered deference. Now for the first time, however, Legolas realized he had lost one of his closest friends to his father and he was not quite sure when that had happened or how. There had been a time when Daugion would have laughed this simple matter away, defending Legolas before his father without needing to know the reason why he had landed himself in trouble.

Scowling, Legolas let loose his last arrow. His conversation with his father early this morning should have warned him of what sort this day would become. His daily meetings with his father each morning often set the tone of his day. Most mornings it was a polite but strained breakfast together during which Legolas reported anything unusual from the nightly watch. But this morning Thranduil had not the courtesy of waiting for Legolas to emerge from his chambers. Instead he had plowed through the doors, slamming them open and waking Legolas from a deep and satisfied sleep.

"_Get up, Legolas!" Thranduil ordered harshly._

"_Ada, the sun hasn't even risen yet!" Legolas protested. "Can't this wait?"_

"_No, it cannot," Thranduil replied. "It has waited too long already. The only reason this did not come last night was out of respect for our guests."_

_Legolas bit back a groan. Another lecture on duty and responsibility was coming. Feeling a bit cheeky he asked, "Adar, can we just skip the entire 'responsibilities of being the prince' speech just this once and assume that I've got it after all these centuries? Honestly, I am an adult and yet you treat me as you would an irresponsible Elfling."_

"_That's because, my dear princeling," countered Thranduil a bit sarcastically, ignoring Legolas's wince, "you still act like one. So no. We cannot skip the 'responsibilities of being a prince' speech because it obviously still hasn't sunk in yet. Only when you prove yourself actually capable of those responsibilities – those of being an adult _and_ a prince – will you be treated as you apparently think you ought to be now."_

"_I don't suppose you would care to hear my excuse before you pass judgment, at least," Legolas asked almost sardonically, knowing it was futile._

"_That's just it, Legolas!" Thranduil bit out in exasperation. "All you have are excuses. I don't ask much of you in an official capacity. On the rare occasion I do, I expect you to attend them! I –"_

"_There was an attack, Ada," Legolas interjected calmly._

"_Don't interrupt me. I – what?" Thranduil asked, taken aback. "An attack? When? Where?"_

"_Yesterday." Now that he had his father's attention Legolas did not feel pressured to respond as quickly as Thranduil might have wanted. He knew his father was going to listen. "It was a few leagues off. I and my unit were patrolling along the river north of here when spiders attacked."_

"_Spiders?" Thranduil interrupted. "You mean there were more than one?"_

"_Yes, Adar. There were three." Legolas stated simply._

"_By the Valar!" Thranduil breathed. "What madness is this?"_

"_I don't know. But one of my Elves was stung. It took the remaining three of us to bring them down and then we had to attend Lithónion. It was all we could do to neutralize the poison before it overwhelmed him. Once we knew he was well enough to withstand the travel, we brought him back here. He is resting now."_

"_Dear Elbereth!" exhaled Thranduil._

"_That is why I missed the feast, Ada," Legolas continued calmly. "Do I now have your pardon?"_

"_Yes, yes," murmured Thranduil distractedly._

"_Good. Then may I ask you now to leave me that I may get ready for the day?" Legolas pressed gently, not wanting to set his father off again._

"_Watch your cheek, Legolas," Thranduil answered almost angrily, coming out of his musings at his son's insolence. "I am still your father."_

"_Yes Ada," submitted Legolas. "I meant no disrespect. I only propose we continue this conversation a little later when we've both had a chance to dress and eat."_

_Thranduil eyed his son warily, unaccustomed to Legolas's lack of defiance. "Fine," he snapped, rather harsher than he intended. "You will dress and meet me in the Great Hall as soon as you are able." He turned to leave. As he reached the chamber door he looked back over his shoulder at his son. "Just so you know," Thranduil informed Legolas, "just because I've given you my pardon doesn't mean I release you from your obligations to the crown. Be appropriately attired when you join me so that you will be ready to greet our guests properly. I will ask them to join us anon. This attack concerns us all." Having concluded his diatribe, Thranduil King of Mirkwood swept out of the room, slamming the door behind him._

Legolas broke out of his reverie, his arm suspended in midair as he was reaching for another arrow. "Ai!" he cried suddenly. He had forgotten about the meeting! On his way down to breakfast Daugion had drawn him aside in order to lecture him and so incensed Legolas that he had forgotten all else in favor of finding some good target practice. Now recalling his father's last words, however, reminded Legolas that he was supposed to be elsewhere.

Realizing this still did not cause Legolas to spring into action. He was in a difficult position; on the one hand, staying right here gave him some much needed privacy to release his irritation before heading in to be at the receiving end of his father's anger. On the other, however, he knew his responsibilities could not wait and he might as well face the king with the Elves of Lothlórien acting as a buffer between his father and himself. Either way, Legolas knew his father's wrath would be upon him later. It was a choice between two evils and Legolas knew not which was the greater. Hesitating only a moment longer Legolas made up his mind, wondering if he would regret the decision later.

_888888888888888888888888_

Haldir furrowed his brow at all the king had just finished telling him. He had been summoned shortly after he had finished breakfast to a meet with the king. Agreeing to it immediately, Haldir had entered Thranduil's Hall once more, this time to find a table in the middle with scrolls and maps set upon it and Thranduil with his head bent over a piece of parchment that he was just finishing signing. Looking up, Thranduil had beckoned Haldir to join him and over the proceeding hour or more had given him much to think about.

Having seen the shadow growing over Dol Guldur himself from his own land, Haldir knew that news was bound to be unhappier than that of Rivendell or Eriador. This knowledge had prepared Haldir, but now the unknown had been given names and he found it all very unsettling.

Haldir sat in thought over these matters for some time before he finally responded. "This is indeed troublesome, King Thranduil. If what you are saying is indeed correct, I fear more dark times are coming."

"Yes, that is my fear as well," answered Thranduil. "In addition to what I have already told you regarding the increasing numbers of _yrch_ spotted throughout the land and the boldness of the spiders that is also growing, I have not yet mentioned that we have had many sightings of a dragon to the east of here."

"A dragon?" Haldir echoed. "There haven't been dragons in the area in years, as my understanding has it." He paused for the merest of seconds. "Unless I'm mistaken," he added with a slight question in his voice.

"No, you are correct in thinking so," responded Thranduil. "The last real dragon threat was Scatha in Ered Mithrin; there have been few sightings since and those were scattered over many years. But now the Men of Dale are living under the threat of a Fire-drake. He has not settled as of yet, but many are predicting that he will. It's only a matter of time."

Just then the doors of hall slammed open, breaking the concentration of the Elves sitting there. Haldir was secretly glad for the interruption; it gave him a moment's time to digest this new piece of information. While dragons were creatures in alliance with no one andserving only themselves, Elves nor Men nor even Dwarves (if Haldir was to be completely honest with himself) did not need the extra strain of having to deal with one, especially in these troubled times. They terrorized and laid waste to the land they chose to call theirs; any and all who were brave enough to withstand such destruction would have their casualties.

"Adar, please forgive my tardiness," said a voice from the end of the hall. "While on my way here I was stopped by Daugion who needed my assistance in a small matter before I could continue on."

Haldir looked up, knowing instinctively that this must be the same Elf he had seen the night before. As far as he knew Thranduil had no other sons. His instincts proved correct; in strode the prince who shortly joined the king and Haldir. Rising to his feet, Haldir quickly appraised the Elf before him. Legolas's long blonde hair was tied back in warrior's braids and a ring of _mithril_ encircled his head. He was dressed in clothing befitting the heir of Thranduil, but Haldir had the distinct impression that Legolas was more comfortable in the common clothing of the sort he had worn the previous night.

"No matter, Legolas," said Thranduil politely, "I was just filling Haldir in with some local news until your arrival." Redirecting his attention to the other Elf he said, "Haldir, it pleases me to introduce you to the head of our guard, primary archery instructor, and prince of Mirkwood, my son Prince Legolas."

Legolas's face as unreadable as he made a formal bow and greeted Haldir. While Haldir may not have been able to gauge the prince's own feelings on the matter, he was nevertheless impressed with Legolas's résumé. Being the marchwarden of Lothlórien was challenging enough and he was not necessarily interested in having any more responsibilities than those involved with his post. But before him was an Elf who not only was a guardsman but head of the entire guard, an archery instructor (_'_the _archery instructor,' _Haldir mentally corrected himself) _and _was the prince! Truly Legolas must be the most extraordinary living being Haldir had ever had the pleasure of meeting.

Bowing in return Haldir replied, "It is an honor to meet you."

"Legolas," said Thranduil, "as I'm sure you know by now, this is our guest, Haldir of the Galadhrim in Lothlórien. As I announced last night at the feast, Haldir will be staying with us for the next month or so. While he is more than welcome to do as he pleases during his stay, Haldir has informed me he would like to be of any service he can for the remainder of his visit. I would like you to make sure he finds something suitable."

"Of course," replied Legolas. He did not miss his father's subtle reminder that he had failed as a host at the previous night's banquet. Nor did he miss Thranduil's implied message: he could practically hear his father's voice adding, _"And you better not screw it up this time"_ as he would have had this conversation taken place privately.

As much as his insides were boiling over with sarcastic retorts, Legolas had far too much experience dealing with his father in court. Rather than saying anything that he knew he would regret later, Legolas turned to Haldir and smiled. Haldir felt his stomach lurch at the sight; Legolas was even more stunning when he smiled. "It would be a privilege," said the prince. Haldir merely nodded, too tongue-tied to trust his own voice and opting to return the prince's smile instead.

Having made the formal introductions, Thranduil bade them both to sit. Haldir, well aware of courtly decorum, waited to be seated until after both the king and prince had taken their places. Once all were seated Thranduil recalled Haldir to their discussion prior to Legolas's arrival.

"Legolas, I was just telling Haldir about the dragon we've been hearing reports on," Thranduil started.

Legolas nodded. "I myself have seen him. Golden-red he is, and terrifying to look upon," he began before being interrupted.

"We can return to this subject a bit later," Thranduil cut in. "But now that you're here I was hoping you would fill us both in about the attack yesterday. I had not mentioned any of it to Haldir yet, as I did not know any of the details. Now, however, perhaps you can remedy that."

Legolas mentally winced at his father's implication. He knew his father was doing everything in his power to remind him of his shortcomings in the presence of a stranger. Thranduil was making sure Legolas knew he was unhappy with him and that another lecture would be forthcoming. Outwardly, however, Legolas gave no visible sign that indicated his own feelings. Instead he replied, "Of course," and went on to explain about the unprecedented attacks on a group of Elves by the three spiders. "Spiders," he concluded turning to Haldir to explain, "are normally quite solitary creatures. They generally will attack and kill one another if there is more than one present; they do not share their prey."

"So now we need to figure out what this means," said Thranduil. "This is unheard of behavior for spiders, working in conjunction with each other. From the sounds of it, they weren't merely in the same vicinity as each other but actually working _together._"

Legolas nodded. "We could feel their anger more than their hunger. It was an unfathomable feeling; almost as if they were upset with us for coming into their territory but pleased to make dinner of us just the same."

"Odd. Very odd indeed," said Thranduil, almost to himself. "I think that at least for the time being we need to be more alert and prepared for an attack. If these creatures are somehow working together against us, we need to be ready. I do not know how to read this riddle, but for now, Legolas, I want you to increase the numbers on guard duty so that there are no fewer than three on any given watch. If we are facing a new threat, let us not be caught unawares."

_8888888888888888888888888_

The meeting went on for several more hours while Thranduil, Legolas, and Haldir discussed the orc raids, the dragon, and the spiders. Haldir also informed Thranduil and Legolas of all that he had learned in his travels since leaving Lothlórien. Changes, however subtle, were happening in the world, and all three of the Elves felt a flicker of oppression growing in their souls, even if they were unwilling to admit it out loud. Eventually, however, a guard knocked on the door informing the king that he had visitors who were demanding an audience with the Elven-king. "Dwarves," he said.

"Dwarves?" echoed Thranduil, surprised. "Very well. Send them in." Redirecting his attention to Haldir and Legolas Thranduil said, "You are dismissed for the day. We shall resume this at a later time."

The two Elves took their leave of the king and left the hall. As they were walking Haldir took the opportunity to change the grim subject they had been discussing prior to the interruption that had excused them from their meeting. "I am sorry I missed meeting you last night at the feast," he began. "though Daugion did point you out to me later that evening as you were talking with Gondien and Revion."

"Good Elves, all," said Legolas, ignoring the irritation that came to him unbidden at Daugion's name. "I have known Daugion since we were children; he and I grew up together. Gondien and Revion both are older, but they are as true and loyal as anyone could wish for; they are both in my guard and were with me yesterday, which is why you didn't see them at the feast. I count them as some of the greatest friends I could ask for."

The shadow that passed over Legolas's features when Daugion's name was mentioned did not escape Haldir's notice. Nor did he miss that Legolas made only a passing reference to Daugion. Apparently he was somehow out of the good graces of the prince; Haldir hoped that he would never find himself on the opposite end of Legolas's scorn, however well he wore it to the outside world. Instead he skirted the issue saying, "I would like to meet these friends of yours."

Legolas smiled broadly. "Indeed you shall. From what little I know of you, I think you will find them quite agreeable. In fact, I was planning on meeting them this afternoon down at the archery field. If you care to join us, I would be pleased to introduce you."

"I would like that very much, Prince Legolas," Haldir responded.

"Legolas," Legolas corrected him. Please, when we are out of earshot of my father, please just call me Legolas. I would make friends with you, Haldir, and between friends there should be no titles, no superiority."

Haldir felt flattered. "Thank you, Prince – I mean Legolas." He smiled. "I would be honored to call myself your friend."

"Well then, friend," said Legolas, amused at how his companion still seemed in awe of him, even having asked him to drop the title, "I'm afraid that I must change out of these garments ere I go down to the field, so if you don't mind, you may go down ahead of me and warm up." Appraising Haldir with his eyes he added mischievously, "You may want to get in the extra practice shots." Grinning he turned and walked up to his quarters, leaving a slightly baffled Haldir in his wake.

_88888888888888888888888_

By the time Legolas changed and worked his way down to the archery field, he was in a much improved mood from earlier that day. While he knew there would be repercussions for his tardiness Legolas also knew that his father would be tied up all day having delayed his affairs for so long while he conferred with Haldir and himself. His inevitable meeting with his father likely would not happen until the next morning; until then, Legolas knew he would be able to relax.

Haldir was also another reason Legolas was in a better mood. He had not been greatly anticipating meeting the Elf from Lórien. So many dignitaries that his father was that insistent upon his meeting them turned out to be stuffy politicians or worse, so full of themselves that Legolas would hardly be taken seriously. Others came and seemed to be unable to stop staring at him, which Legolas never had learned to appreciate. He wished to be considered for who he was, not how he looked. While Haldir certainly seemed a little star-struck, he also was articulate and thoughtful, listening to Legolas and able to carry an intelligent conversation. Around such an Elf Legolas knew he could be comfortable and very much himself – a rare gift, but one that Legolas deeply valued.

When he arrived at the field Legolas saw that Haldir was already deep in conversation with Revion. Apparently Revion had said something rather humorous because Legolas saw Haldir throw his head back in laughter which reached Legolas's ears a second later. There was music in that laughter, a sound like many tiny silver bells dancing on a string that was also somehow deep and resounding: a laugh of someone who enjoyed life.

Quietly even for an Elf, Legolas crept up behind the two. As he approached he heard his name mentioned and Haldir's wonderful laughter again. Stopping abruptly behind them he said, "You know, it's not nice to talk about someone when they're not there to defend themselves."

Starting, Haldir and Revion turned to look at Legolas. "Elbereth, you scared me, Legolas!" Revion gasped, "Don't you know it's not nice to sneak up on someone when they're talking about you behind your back?"

Amused, Legolas arched his eyebrow and stared down his friend until he gave in. "I was just telling our new friend here about a certain little incident the last time the Lords Elladan and Elrohir and the Lady Arwen were here," Revion said with a mischievous glint in his eye. "You know the one I speak of… you'll recall it had something to do with a squirrel, a wooden crate, and a water goblet…" His voice trailed off, letting Legolas's memory fill in the rest.

"Oh good Valar!" exclaimed Legolas rolling his eyes, feigning embarrassment and causing Haldir to chuckle. "Of all the stories to tell our guest the very first time you meet him!"

"Yes, well," began Revion, "I figured it was only fair Haldir here learned the truth about you before he learned it the hard way."

"Yes," said Haldir, "this was a very insightful story. Thank you, Revion," he continued in mock formality, turning to Revion, "It has indeed opened my eyes. I look forward to my continuing education."

"You shall have it, then," answered Revion.

"And you both shall have it," interejected Legolas, "if I hear of any other such lies besmirching my good name."

Revion snorted, quickly disguising his reaction by turning it into a cough. "Good?" he laughed, "Who said anything about 'besmirching' your 'good' name? I say, you're quite capable of doing that on your own, especially if any squirrels are around," he finished, causing Haldir to once again break into laughter.

"I can just see it!" Haldir said, wiping a tear away, "Of course, I'm sure the twins were completely innocent in all this as well."

"You know the twins as well as I do," scoffed Legolas. "With their involvement, how can you but believe my innocence? I merely was in the wrong place in the wrong time."

"Right!" hooted Revion, "and I'm the king of Gondor!"

Legolas rolled his eyes then threw up his hands in mock surrender. "I give up," he said. "You obviously have filled this good Elf's head with utter nonsense, which apparently not even I, Prince of Mirkwood, can allay." Bringing forth his bow he continued, "I therefore challenge you in a shooting contest to regain my honor."

"Nay!" said Revion, throwing up his hands, "That would be an unequal challenge. Instead I admit you completely free of all said accusations of mischief and mayhem and lay the blame entirely upon the previously mentioned lords of Rivendell." Looking askance at Haldir he added in a fake whisper, "But you and I know the real truth."

Haldir smirked and Legolas, who did not need the keen hearing of his kind to hear Revion's jibe, just shook his head in mock dismay. "I can see that this is a lost battle," he said.

"Yes, it is," nodded Haldir. "I'm afraid there's no use denying it any longer, Legolas. I have seen your true nature and there's simply no going back."

Legolas looked as if he was about to respond, but just then he was distracted by another Elf, running down the hill to meet them. His face was drawn and a great anxiety seemed to drive him. As he arrived Legolas stepped forward, his smile fading. "What is it?" he asked with concern in his voice.

"Prince Legolas," said the messenger breathlessly, "Come quickly! Your father has taken suddenly ill!"

All the laughter fell out of the Elves' eyes. "Ill?" echoed Legolas faintly. "How can this be? Take me to him at once!" And without turning to beg leave from his companions, he raced back to the palace with Haldir and Revion shortly on his heels.

To be continued…


	3. Investigations and a Bold Request

Legolas paced outside the king's chambers. The healers had allowed him a brief visit when he had first arrived, but since then they had asked him to remain outside so that they could work more efficiently. "Please, Prince Legolas," they had said, "We know your concern for your father, but right now he needs rest. You can do nothing more for him right now. We'll call you as soon as we know anything."

It was infuriating. His father was laying there with an unknown illness and the healers felt that he was incapable of knowing any of the details! Even if he were not concerned as a son, he had the right as the prince. In the moment that he had been allowed to visit, Legolas had seen that his father was pale, his skin waxy and cool, and his eyes were closed. It was so surreally unnatural. Never before had he seen his father, always a picture of strength and nobility, lying so still.

"Legolas," Revion interrupted his thoughts, "You must settle down. You're only going to wear yourself out!"

Legolas stopped his pacing long enough to glare at his friend. "Wear myself out?" he echoed angrily before resuming his pacing. "Is that your only concern? My father is lying in there, struck down by some unknown force and he's not responding to the treatment he is receiving and all you're concerned about is that I wear myself out? Elbereth! He could be dying! And no one will say anything of what happened!" he exploded.

"Mellon nin," murmured Revion soothingly, "Do not mistake my concern for you for callousness over your father's condition. The healers are right; there is nothing you can do right now and we need our prince to stay healthy as well."

"But I can't just do nothing!" protested Legolas. "What use is it for me to be a prince if I can't help my father?"

Haldir, who had remained silent up until now, suddenly spoke. "I hope you don't think me overstepping my bounds as a stranger here," he began, "but perhaps there is something you _can_ do."

Legolas lifted his gaze from the floor to look at Haldir expectantly. "Yes?" he asked. "Please, I will receive any offers you have right now."

"Well," said Haldir kindly, "it's not much, but perhaps you can learn more by speaking with your father's senior advisors who may have been present when he collapsed. They may be able to give you more information."

Legolas's eyes lit up. "That's true!" he exclaimed. "I don't know why I didn't think of that!" he added softly, speaking more to himself than the other two Elves. "Oh, but I don't want to leave my father either!" he burst out anxiously.

"Legolas," Revion said, "I will stay here with your father. If anything should happen I will come and fetch you straight away."

Eying him thoughtfully, Legolas considered his friend's offer for all of two seconds. "Yes," he said, "That would be acceptable."

"Good. Then it is settled," said Revion before turning to Haldir. "Haldir, would you care to stay with me?"

Haldir looked up at Legolas. The prince looked down at him, harried and anxious yet somehow expectant. Despite the suddenness of the news, Legolas looked as if he had not slept for some nights. His eyes were dark with worry and a frown wrinkled his brow. What he must be feeling Haldir could only imagine.

"I will do as Legolas wishes," Haldir answered Revion, redirecting his attention. "If I were to stay, I could act as a messenger in the event of any change so that you might stay with the king until Legolas arrives. Otherwise perhaps I can assist Legolas in discovering some answers to this puzzle." He turned his gaze upon Legolas once again, silently asking the Elf for his decision.

For a moment Legolas was torn. Haldir was offering two valuable services. The former would allow Revion to stay with his father so that if – _'when,' _Legolas corrected himself – he awoke there would be someone familiar at his side. The latter, however, might prove more valuable in the long run. Already Haldir had shown himself to be level-headed and insightful; perhaps with his help he could get to the bottom of this sooner and thereby find the cure for his father before it became too late.

Resolved, Legolas looked down at his new-found friend. "I thank you for your offers, Haldir. You are a stranger to this place and yet you bring me much comfort in your helpfulness. I would like for you come with me now, so that together we may find some answers."

Haldir smiled a comforting smile and stood up. "By your leave, Revion," he said.

"You will find me immediately if anything… _anything_… changes, won't you?" Legolas added.

Revion stood and nodded. "Of course, Legolas. Go now and may you find some good news."

Legolas put his hand upon his friend's shoulder. "_Diola lle, _Revion," he said softly, meeting the other Elf's eyes. There he found solace, knowing his friend would not let him down. Then he broke away and turned towards Haldir. "Let us not waste any more time," he said, "He was in the Great Hall when he – when it happened. Come, _mellon_." With that, he turned and started walking down the corridor.

Haldir paused only a moment to glance at Revion. The Elf was gazing past him at the retreating prince. He turned his eyes upon Haldir still standing there. "Go," he mouthed, shooing him away with his hands. "We'll meet again soon."

Noddling, Haldir turned and lightly ran to catch up with Legolas. The prince was walking swiftly towards the throne room and did not break stride as Haldir joined him. Since Legolas seemed deep in his own thoughts Haldir decided not to disturb him and was consequently surprised when Legolas addressed him.

"Thank you for coming with me." Legolas said in an even voice, not turning his eyes away from his destination.

"Of course," answered Haldir carefully, "but I do not know how much assistance I can provide to you as I am unfamiliar with this kingdom and the usual customs of its people."

"I'm sure you underestimate yourself," Legolas replied. "But even if you aren't, I would be glad for your concern and support." He fell silent.

Not knowing exactly how to respond to him, Haldir decided to redirect their conversation instead. "Your father is strong, Legolas." For the first time Haldir did not feel awkward about not using his title. His conversation with Revion down at the archery field had relieved some of the tension he was holding regarding the prince and more than ever Legolas needed a friend and not another subject. "He will beat this yet. And whatever happened, we'll find the answers. We will!"

The utter confidence of the last statement finally caused Legolas to look at his companion. He smiled wryly at Haldir, some of the tension easing from his features. "Thank you, Haldir. You're right, of course. If nothing else, my father is blatantly stubborn and will not give into this without a fight. And when he makes up his mind about something – and I'm sure this applies even now in his illness – he's not going to change his mind. He won't succumb, so neither will I. Thank you for reminding me." He paused and took in Haldir's supporting smile. "And you're right. We'll get to the bottom of this. We will, because there's simply no other option available."

"Right," agreed Haldir, not sure what else to say.

"Oh Haldir, this is all my fault!" cried Legolas abruptly, startling Haldir. Legolas's momentary calm manner was shattered to be replaced with… guilt? What in Arda was he talking about?

"Legolas?" Haldir questioned hesitantly.

"It is!" Legolas reiterated. "I was secretly hoping for a way out of another row with my father and here it is: the only way out would be for something like this to happen. I _willed_ this into being. If I wasn't always so stuck on myself, this may not have happened. But now my father is lying there with some unknown illness and we have no idea what happened or how to make him better!"

"Legolas!" cried Haldir exasperated, interrupting the other Elf's ramblings and stopping short. He could not believe what he was hearing! "Listen to yourself! You cannot have possibly caused this. You're being ridiculous." Haldir cut himself off, realizing what he just called the prince of Mirkwood and virtual stranger, but not feeling too much remorse over it. After all, Legolas sounded like he needed some sense slapped into him and at the moment, Haldir was the only one present to do so.

Apparently Legolas was having similar thoughts because he too stopped to turn and look at Haldir. At first his eyes flashed anger but then his shoulders sagged, defeated. "You're right," he half-whispered. "You're always right. Let us just go in and see what we can find."

Only then did Haldir notice that they were right before the great doors that marked the entrance to the throne room where the king had collapsed. Striding forward, he pushed the doors open and stood aside in order to let Legolas pass. A guard stood on the other side of the door and began to protest their entrance, but as soon as he saw the prince he shut his mouth with an audible snap and bowed deeply instead. Legolas took little note of him and swept past, searching the room for someone to help him.

Momentarily forgotten, Haldir turned to survey the room he, Legolas, and the king had held conference in only a few hours prior. Not much had changed. The table at which they had all sat was still in the center of the room, but two more chairs had been added and the maps and other documents were cleared away. In their place stood six goblets at each seat and a tray in the center that held some fruit and bread. _'Was the king entertaining?'_ Haldir asked himself. He found the arrangement slightly odd for the middle of the afternoon and could not understand why food should be brought into this particular room at all. But then again, he was a foreigner and did not know if this might be but a daily custom of the king.

Looking away from the table Haldir took in the rest of the room. Milling around in various sized groups were Men and Elves, all hunched together and whispering. It took little imagination to guess their thoughts; even without the swift feet of gossip to aid the spread of the news, it was likely that these people were present when the king collapsed. Guards were stationed around the room at all the exits and kept a wary eye on those present; unbeknownst to but not unsuspected by Haldir they had been ordered not to let anyone leave. As Haldir turned back to the guard who was barring the door he and Legolas had just entered he noticed a group of distraught looking Dwarves were also present and speaking animatedly with one of the guards. Legolas, too, had seen this and had joined the conversation.

Haldir took note of Legolas's position and addressed the guard next to him. "Can you tell me what happened?" he asked.

The guard glanced at Haldir briefly before turning his gaze back upon the room. "King Thranduil collapsed," he said in a flat tone that told Haldir he would not say more on the matter.

Undeterred, however, Haldir tried again. "I am aware," he said. "I was with Prince Legolas when he received the news and I accompanied him to his father's side and now again to this room so that I might help him investigate. Please, if you can tell me anything, I would really appreciate it."

Once again the guard looked at Haldir, this time a bit more carefully. "You are of the party from Lothlórien," he commented, "are you not?"

Haldir nodded. "Yes, I am Haldir."

"You were with the king shortly before his collapse."

"Yes," answered Haldir, feeling slightly irritated. After all, he was the one who was supposed to be asking questions and now he felt as if he was being put on trial. "He and I held conference with the prince in this room not two hours ago. When we left him, he was hale and alert. Please, what can you tell me?"

The guard studied the strange Elf's face carefully. He _did _come in with Prince Legolas and there was only truth reflecting out of his eyes. Perhaps he could be a little more specific. "I was stationed here even as you were meeting with the king," he began, "so I saw everything that has happened in this room since. However, I am still under orders; I can only give you what everyone else here already witnessed."

Haldir nodded, thankful. While he would want to know more, at the very least he would know where to begin in helping Legolas find some answers. "Anything you can tell me I would appreciate," he said gratefully.

"After you left King Thranduil opened the court up to the public, as is his wont each afternoon," the guard began, "This is the time that anyone who wishes to see the king may approach the throne. However today his meeting with you went long and cut short the time he normally spends with the people." For a moment his features darkened. "There was a group of Dwarves, who you will see over there –" he motioned to the group Haldir had already noticed, "who were very insistent upon seeing the king immediately and in private. Normally the king will not favor such requests, but something made him change his mind and he asked everyone present to stay back while he conferred with them. I was occupied with trying to keep one particularly insistent _elleth_ from interrupting their meeting, so I did not notice what exactly happened. Eventually she gave up and left the hall, however, and I was finally able to return my attention to the room in time to see the king collapse. I do not know how or why it happened." He paused for a moment while his hard features softened in apology. "I'm truly sorry I can't be more helpful."

Haldir nodded, feeling slightly disappointed. "Thank you anyway," he said. "I appreciate your help."

"I only wish I could tell you more," said the guard trying to be helpful, "but I am sure there are plenty of other people who saw it happen."

"Indeed," replied Haldir. "If you don't mind, I'll see if I can find out anything more from anyone else."

"Of course," said the guard. He said something else as well, but Haldir did not hear him. His attention was already turned towards the group of Dwarves. If they had been with the king when it had happened, they would be the best people to talk to. Legolas, however, had already talked with them and Haldir, being a stranger, could probably glean little more than the prince already had.

Thinking of asking Legolas what he had learned he suddenly became aware that the other Elf was no longer talking with the Dwarves. In fact, the Dwarves were no longer even speaking to the guard who had been with them when Haldir had entered the room. Instead they were all hunched together, their heads bowed and they appeared to be deep in conference. They were unlikely to be receptive to further inquiries. Haldir had experienced the bristling hostility of Dwarvish pride in the past. They were stubborn creatures, especially if they felt like they were being attacked, and Haldir decided to find Legolas instead to learn what information he had received from his interview with them.

Haldir scanned the room looking for the tall blonde Elf but he was nowhere to be seen. Puzzled over the disappearance of the prince he began to walk around the room checking corners in case he overlooked Legolas, but was distracted by the sound of someone calling his name. Turning he saw Daugion striding towards him with a grim look on his face.

"Daugion! I was just looking for Prince Legolas. Have you seen him?" Haldir asked.

Daugion nodded, only slightly wondering how the two had met already. "I was just speaking with him. But I don't know where he went. Why?"

Haldir explained the events that led up to his arrival in the throne room. "I was hoping he was having better luck than I was," he concluded.

"Ah. Well, I can be of some small assistance," replied Daugion, "as I was with the king when… well, you know."

"Really?" Haldir breathed, a small ray of hope piercing the gloom in his heart.

"Yes," Daugion answered. "Let us find a quieter place where we can speak undisturbed."

_888888888888888888888888_

Legolas had, in fact, forgotten that Haldir had accompanied him to the Great Hall. At the moment, he had even forgotten the original reason he had come at all. Not that the concern for his father had been eradicated, but the information he had just received from five very agitated Dwarves drove all other thought from his mind. According to the Dwarves, the dragon that had been sighted had landed at Erebor, laid waste to the city of Dale, and had driven the Dwarves and Men completely from the area. Although not entirely unexpected, the news certainly was terribly unwelcomed.

"Is there somewhere you and I can speak in private?" asked the Dwarf who appeared to be the head of the contingent.

"Of course," said Legolas, frowning slightly. "My father has a private office where he does a lot of work when he's not to be disturbed. It's right off this hall. If your companions would excuse us," he finished politely addressing the other Dwarves.

The Dwarf, who indeed looked very important and very much harried, nodded to the others and told them to stay there until he returned. Following Legolas as he wound his way through the crowds he said, "I certainly appreciate you being able to meet with me about this."

"In here," Legolas directed, unintentionally ignoring the last comment from the Dwarf. He opened a discrete door in back and slightly left of his father's throne and ushered the Dwarf in before following and closing the door behind him. The room was extraordinarily small compared to every other room in the palace, but Thranduil preferred it that way. The space allowed him to forget about needing to be the stately king, stern and honest in front of crowds of people who every day came to see him in court. Here he was merely an Elf who had the peace he needed to get his work done undisturbed.

In the center of the room there stood a large and ornate desk at which Legolas took his seat. He motioned to the Dwarf to sit opposite. "There are few in the kingdom who know of this place," Legolas said, "and fewer still would be so bold as to knock; those who are have the king's blessing – and therefore mine – to do so."

The Dwarf nodded gruffly, his face registering approval under his long reddish-brown beard. "Thank you," he replied. "I don't mean to be so secretive, but I think you will come to understand why."

"I already understand your concern," began Legolas, "but now I am hoping you can fill me in a little more than what I heard from you and your kin out in the main hall. What is it that you expect from Mirkwood?"

"I intend to go back and fight for what is ours," said the Dwarf. "I know our people have not seen eye to eye in the past, but I think we can agree that this is a threat that is bigger than our differences. Will you assist us?"

Legolas gazed long at the Dwarf sitting across from him, revealing nothing of what he was thinking. Under such a stare most people would start to feel uncomfortable, but this Dwarf did not react. If what Elladan and Elrohir had dubbed "the Look" did not unnerve this being, he certainly must be someone to reckon with.

"What is your name, Dwarf?" he asked, finally breaking the silence.

The Dwarf studied Legolas almost suspiciously. He did not know what sort of Elf the prince was as he never had dealings with him before. He might be the type to make unreasonable demands from him once he knew who he was. On the other hand, the king was a fairly reasonable Elf and the prince seemed inclined to follow in his father's footsteps. Besides, if any time needed diplomacy, now was it. "My name is Thrór, son of Dáin, King under the Mountain."

"Well, Thrór, son of Dáin, King under the Mountain, you come to me with terrible news." Legolas began. "I do not doubt your tale, as we have seen the dragon for ourselves and feared it was only a matter of time before he settled. It is long since the Dwarves have come requesting the aid of the Elves, and little else could deflate the pride of your people enough to seek our help than this threat. However, what you are asking – that we form an army to attack and defeat a dragon and reclaim your kingdom – is remarkably impertinent." Legolas raised his hand to ward off the Dwarf's indignant protests. "When was the last time the Dwarves have come to the aid of the Elves? The Watchful Peace has ended. The Necromancer is once again gaining power in the South and his forces are becoming bolder. You are asking us to sacrifice the sanctity of this kingdom during these troubled times to fight a _dragon_. We would be laying down our lives in a potentially futile battle so that you might regain your kingdom. You have kin in Ered Mithrin; why turn to us? Give me some reasonable explanation as to why we should help you."

"You are fair in your assessment, Prince Legolas," said Thrór grudgingly, "It _has_ been long since our peoples have worked together. And while this is a matter of regaining our – the Dwarves' – kingdom, I believe that the dragon's presence affects us all. You may not have any association with the Dwarves, but you are friendly with the Men of Dale, and their town has been utterly destroyed, its people killed or driven out into the wilderness. In these 'troubled times', as you say, it is important that we stand united to regain any land that has been wrongfully taken. Our enemies would have us cower before them, and even if this Smaug – for that is the dragon's name – is not aligned with anyone, the Necromancer could still use him to destroy and devour those who stand in his way. As for your question regarding the Dwarves in Ered Mithrin, I have sent messengers to them in the hopes that they will be able to join us. They, however, have been having their fair share of problems with the dragons breeding in the Withered Heath, and I do not know how much assistance they can give."

"You are presumptuous, Master Dwarf, but you are honest," replied Legolas. "Even so, you are asking much. If your kin are indeed having troubles with the dragons, I have to question whether you have gone to their aid. Seeing the look on your face I can guess that you have not. If that is the case, I have to wonder if the Dwarves of Erebor can think of anyone else in their duress. Were our positions reversed and I came to you seeking aid, would you give it?" This last question he asked almost reflectively, not really looking for an answer from the Dwarf.

"Perhaps not," answered Thrór disgruntled, acknowledging the truth in Legolas's last question. "But I would like to think that were that the case and I saw the threat that was posed not only to your people but those of my allies, I would be willing to give as much assistance as I was able."

Legolas remained silent, contemplating the Dwarf's request. It seemed a fool's errand to go charging into a dragon's lair for any reason, and Legolas, like most of his kin, was not inclined to do anything to support the pride of the Dwarves. He suspected that much of what the king said was more out of a desire to appease him than to appeal to what he might think a higher cause. But his words had the ring of truth to them, intentional or not, and Legolas could not deny that.

"I understand your request," Legolas finally answered, "but this is not my decision to make. When the king returns to health, I shall advise him on what you have related to me and what I think is the best course of action." Although his face was a mask, mentally Legolas was contemplating the ramifications of going to war without the expressed approval of his father.

Thrór stood up rather hastily. "This cannot be your answer!" he exclaimed rather harsher than he intended. "You know not how long King Thranduil will be laid up. He might be better this afternoon, or he might remain uncured indefinitely. Would you deny us your aid that long – so that my grandson's grandson still lives in exile and the Men of Dale all but forget that they once lived in peace in the shadow of Erebor?"

Legolas's eyes blazed. "Do not mistake me, Dwarf. This is my decision. How dare you, a stranger to this land, come before me, brashly ask for my help, and accuse me of not giving aid to your people because I must wait for the king to wake? You act as if you expect him never to do so. Is this the folly of the Dwarves, or do you know more than you let on?"

Pounding his fist on the desk in front of Legolas Thrór glared at the Elf. "How dare you accuse the Dwarves of such heinous acts!" he roared. "Perhaps our peoples do not have a history of getting along, but to stand here and listen to this is more than what should be reasonably expected."

The fury of the Dwarf was met with a look of resignation on Legolas's face. "You're right, King Thrór," he said placidly, "Please sit down."

Warily Thrór eyed the Elf, looking for any trickery he might find written in his features. Seeing none but still on his guard he sat gingerly on the edge of his seat, ready to spring into action if it proved necessary.

"I do not mean to accuse you of anything," said Legolas contritely. "Please accept my apology."

Thrór felt the urge to surreptitiously mutter darkly into his beard so that the Elf in front of him knew exactly how he felt, but seeing as this was beneath him he opted to instead accept the apology. It was, after all, graciously given. "I accept," he said simply.

"Good." Legolas responded, suspecting what was going on inside the other's head though the Dwarf gave no outward indication of his thoughts. "Now, getting back to what I was saying before. I cannot answer your request at this time." Throwing up his hand to ward off any further outbursts from the Dwarf he continued. "I will not make you wait indefinitely, if it comes to that, but know that this is the king's decision to make and I will not make it for him when he has only just fallen ill. Very likely he will be recovered shortly and you shall have your answer." Legolas hoped the helpless anxiety he felt was not reflected in his voice. It would not be well for the Dwarf to think him weak. "In the meantime, I invite you to stay. We can show you and your party to the guest quarters."

"Very well," said Thrór visibly relaxing. "I thank you for your hospitality. Now if you'll excuse me, I really should rejoin my companions."

"Of course." Legolas nodded. Suddenly he remembered Haldir and their original reason for coming to the Great Hall. "I too am needed elsewhere." Standing, Legolas moved towards the door and opened it for the Dwarf. As Thrór walked past him he added, "We shall talk again soon."

"That is all I can ask, for now," said Thrór.

Smiling wryly Legolas thought the Dwarf had asked plenty more. Not eager to incite another tongue-lashing, however, he refrained from pointing this out. Instead he followed the Dwarf into the adjoining hall and watched as he made his way back to his kinfolk before turning his gaze upon the rest of the room. Quickly ascertaining that Haldir was no longer present he approached the nearest guard.

"Tell me, do you know what happened to the Elf Haldir who entered the Throne Room with me?" he asked.

"Yes, Prince Legolas," the guard supplied, "He and Daugion departed some minutes ago out those doors. From thence I do not know."

"Thank you," answered Legolas hastily and followed the path that the two Elves must have taken. Going quickly down the hall, he realized he was headed for the kitchen.

'_Maybe they learned something,' _he thought to himself. Perhaps the food he saw earlier on the table was poisoned and Haldir and Daugion were going to ask the kitchen staff what they knew. That was the most logical explanation. Surrounded by witnesses that had seen nothing out of the ordinary, the king was not attacked by any visible foe. It could have been a mere accident of the wrong herbs ending up in the food. But if that were the case, the Dwarves who had been dining with him would also have collapsed. Something more sinister was happening. Legolas refused to believe anyone in his kingdom could do anything so terrible as poison the king, but the nagging suspicion lingered in his mind, propelling him to find the two Elves as quickly as possible to find some answers.

As he reached the doors to the kitchen he could hear Haldir's resonant voice that sounded like low music heard across a wide expanse of water. Legolas found the sound oddly soothing, as if somehow by the mere act of questioning Haldir was finding solutions that would make everything turn out okay. There was safety there in his voice, comfort and security that could only be found in one held dear.

What was he thinking? Legolas shook himself mentally. This was madness! His father was struck with some sort of illness and was not responding to treatment. Right now he needed answers and here he was, pausing to consider the tonality of the voice of an Elf he barely knew!

Breaking his reverie, Legolas broke through the doors leading into the kitchen. As the doors opened he could hear Haldir saying to someone, "So this is it? All he had was the fruit, bread, and water?"

As he rounded the corner, Legolas saw before him Haldir with goblet in his hand speaking to a kitchen maid Legolas only knew by sight. Daugion stood behind him with his arms crossed and a concerned frown creasing his brow.

"Yes," answered the maid. "He only wanted to refresh his guests after their long journey."

Haldir lifted the goblet to his nose, trying to discern if there were any unfamiliar scents. Noticing nothing out of the ordinary, he turned to examine the food left on the platter in front of him. It seemed perfectly normal. Whatever had caused the king's collapse certainly was not to be found here. Yet this could be the only explanation. According to Daugion, the king had been eating with the Dwarves directly prior to the incident. The answer had to lie with the food.

"Are you sure there's nothing else you have to add?" questioned Daugion. "You saw nothing or no one out of place here?"

"No sir." The maid bobbed politely at Daugion. "But I was not present the entire time. You may have to ask others if they did."

"We certainly will," interrupted Legolas, causing Daugion, the maid, and Haldir all to jump. Water from the goblet still in Haldir's hand splashed onto his tunic. No one had noticed the prince standing there.

"Your majesty!" gasped the maid, dropping into the proper curtsey.

"Legolas!" exclaimed Daugion and Haldir simultaneously. Haldir looked down upon his shirt. Brilliant move. He was hoping to impress Legolas, not prove what an utter klutz he apparently was. Trying to appear casual, he set the goblet down and strode forward to greet the prince. As he did so, he passed his hand over the front of tunic, trying to dispel some of the water that clung to him.

Watching Haldir's quickly mask the horror on his face, Legolas has to fight back a smile. Here was an Elf he would definitely enjoy teasing. When the time was right, of course. There should be nothing to smile about now. They were close to having some answers. He could just feel it.

As he watched Haldir trying to dry himself he saw the other Elf suddenly freeze, his look turning abruptly from chagrin to shock. Legolas noted the change and stepped forward in concern. The move proved fortunate as in the next moment Haldir rolled his eyes up in the back of his head and fell almost gracefully into his waiting arms.

"Haldir!" Legolas called. "Are you okay?"

No response. The Elf simply laid there with his eyes closed, a look of absurd peace on his face.

"He's asleep!" exclaimed Legolas in astonishment.

To be continued…

_A/N: For those of you really into the history of Middle-earth, I beg that you can forgive my alterations of events and timelines. This story came me and I started writing before I realized that dwarves weren't occupying Erebor at this time (though I was aware that the events that led up to the story of The Hobbit were necessarily going to be altered). Just pretend the Dwarves had already returned. I'm also aware that Thrór would not have been born yet (and therefore not king when Smaug attacked), but I'm going to pretend he was and that Thráin was born late in his father's life (in the same year Tolkien has given us) so that the rest of the timeline thereafter is not disturbed. Finally, I'm also aware that Thrór doesn't return to Erebor until 127 years after the events current to this chapter and that they would not be driven out from the Lonely Mountain for yet another 180 years after that. However, this is where I remind you that at the very beginning I said there would be some AU elements to this story in order for things to occur as I imagine them. _

_I reiterate that I will try to stay as true to Tolkien (and occasionally Peter Jackson) as possible in the events that occur directly in The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. As the events prior to these books are less known, I feel comfortable enough for the sake of this one fanfic to alter them to suit my needs. For the true purist out there, however, I beg you to imagine this as a temporal rift that occurs between the introduction of Haldir in Mirkwood (in the same year as Gollum finds the Ring) and the advent of Smaug and receive my promise that, in the event I write another LOTR fanfic, I'll do better next time._


	4. In Dreams

Rating: M for m/m sexual situations in this chapter. You have been warned.

A/N: This chapter is a bit obscure, I'll admit it. If you're not into abstract writing, go ahead and skip this chapter (after this chapter it returns to normal, I promise!). But I include it because it is important and I'll be making some subtle (and not so subtle) references to this chapter for the remainder of the story.

A/N: In this chapter I borrowed a line from Henry Vaughan's poem "I Saw Eternity" and I want to give credit where it's due. The relevant lines from the poem are as follows:

I saw Eternity the other night

Like a ring of pure and endless light

All calm, as it was bright;

And round beneath it, Time in hours, days, years,

Driv'n by the spheres

Like a vast shadow mov'd; in which the world

And all her train were hurl'd.

_A white-hot sun burned down fiercely upon a barren land. As far as the eye could see was white earth, stretched thin and almost translucent in the blazing sunlight. No plant life could live in this environment and no rock marred the almost-perfect landscape. Were it not for the solidity of the ground beneath his feet, the only occupant of the land might mistake his surroundings for a sea of mist or perfectly white satin sheets in which he might be floating._

_Haldir looked up, shielding his eyes with his hand, looking for some sign from the sky, but the sun filled his senses completely and there was no sky, no earth, no stars or moon or air. There was only the sun, bright and cruel and unforgiving in its orbit. Unable to tear his eyes away or close them against such nobility, Haldir felt like crying from the pain of such beauty. The entirety of his senses was filled with its presence and he felt suspended as in mid-air, the sun-being calling him into existence. The sunlight pored from his skin, so illuminating the Elf that were he seen by another, he or she would not be able to tell him for anything other than a miniature of the harsh sun. Heat flowed through his body and his ears became aware of the singing of the land and sun that no being, mortal or immortal was ever meant to hear. _

"Irmo Lórien!" _Haldir cried, his voice breaking under the strain of his despair. _"For the love of those Eru calls his own, please release me!"

_As soon as his voice shattered the singing the awful silence that had permeated the land returned and Haldir was able to close his eyes against the harsh glare of the sun. Slowly he felt his feet return to the ground and a sudden coolness unnatural of the Elves claimed him and he embraced it. Tears streamed down his face and a sorrow that he never knew he could feel swelled within him. Such terrible music was never meant for him and he knew it would have killed him, but to be separated from it now felt like the deepest loss he could ever imagine. _

_For an endless time he cried. He cried for the stark beauty of the land and the sun. He cried for the music that created life and for the loss of that music in him. He cried for his innocence that the sun now claimed for its own. All that he ever was and all that he ever might have been now was laid waste in this void and he was no longer his own. He was only his tears, and his tears would never end. He poured himself into his tears; his whole being now was crystalline fluidity._

_Out of the land ran a small stream, only a handbreadth across but crisp and clean as liquid diamonds flowing merrily over a bed of colored sea-glass, heedless of the brutality of the sun above, unmindful of the nothingness through which it flowed. The colors at the bottom of the river shone green and red and blue and called to Haldir: "Come! Sing! Dance! Play with us! For long has it been since one so fair has joined us. Forget your woes and be at peace! Come and sing and dance and love!"_

_A yearning greater than he had ever known before suddenly seized Haldir. Greater than his sorrow, it called him forth to the waters' edge. The sun that had so stripped him of all his joy was now forgotten in the intensity of his need to become one with the water. To flow gently over the glass, to become one with the water was his only design. He knew no other purpose. If the sun had called him into existence, then the water was to fulfill him beyond all other hopes of reconciliation to his former self. He was meant for the water, or perhaps the water was meant for him. Either way, he knew his fate was sealed within it and he was to become one with it, complete in its ring of pure and endless light._

_Eager as he was to empty himself into the stream, Haldir poured slowly into it, afraid too much joy too quickly would overwhelm his now fragile system. The water mingled and merged and become one with his essence and the music that was in the sea-glass and in the water was now filling him, completing him in a way that he never could have dreamed in his former life, could he remember it. All that was before was less than a distant memory; he did not exist before this moment. Joy, pure and undiluted washed about him, caressing him and seeking his permission to fill him. He denied it nothing and were he yet lucid it would have drowned him. But Haldir the Woodland Elf was no longer; he did not know his own name, or even if he ever had a name. He simply Was, one with the many waters, and that was greater than any other existence._

_Endless time passed and still the river flowed over its cut bed, out of the land of the harsh harsh sun. The music that was joy and laughter and merriment grew more present and the river was filled with its singing. The song swelled and entered into the heart of the changing landscape as it greeted the ever widening river on its way. Ethereal whiteness gave way to cool greys and browns that soon took on the shapes of lichen covered boulders that hid young fern fronds in their crevices and the colorful sea-glass riverbed became more subdued in its tones, giving way to sand and small pebbles. Still onward the river flowed, gladly greeting its surroundings but feeling a jovial enthusiasm to see what was next to come._

_Flatlands gave forth to hills and glens, boulders and ferns turning to cliff sides and mighty trees. Still on the river flowed. "Be merry and gay! Grow tall, green trees, and drink deep. Climb ever higher to the sky and never forget your joy!" it cried as it danced its cheerful way over its ever broadening riverbed. The trees rustled in glad response, feeling gracious and free as if they themselves could take part in the great dance of their friend and move as gracefully through the land as it._

_Down the river flowed, over grades and over cliffs, laughing as it fell, each drop of water taking delight in its being unbound from the greater body. Singing as they fell, the drops with unfettered delight struck every slick rock face where they broke yet again into pieces only to be rejoined in glad reconciliation with its former self. Such freedom! Such mirth! "Farewell, farewell you mighty cliffs! Be glad at my coming and do not grieve my parting!" laughed the river so joyously the rocks felt young again, pleased to send the river on its most exuberant way._

_And now again the waters doubled in size, barely large enough to contain its own revelry. Deeply it churned, its feet dancing in the silt below and its surface stretching out so as to splash along its shores. The feeling of greatness swelling in its being, its youthful glee turning into more mature, deeply rooted contentment, glad and strong in its existence. On the river flowed, feeling the joy of living creatures beginning to form in its body. Fish and frogs and plant life that ebbed and flowed in rhythm with the dance tickled and delighted the water. "Be strong and glad! Grow and multiply, for I have much to give!" it sang. The living creatures heard its call and answered as on the river flowed; the waters teamed with the abundance of Eru's generosity._

_The song began to change. What once was a free-spirited dream, fast and furious in its rapture now became somehow more resilient and pure, the delights of life flowing through its heartstrings causing a deep passion to swell in the stead of the light-hearted headiness. It was a joy of parenthood, of giving life and allowing that life to form and grow in its guidance. Utter contentment overwhelmed the river, peace entering every molecule of its existence. It had come a long way from the crystalline existence of the white land. Though the memory of that place was still strong, it was in the very distant past. Now was a time for reflection and gratuitousness for all that that land had given it; for without it, the joy now present and followed with reckless abandon could never have formed, never have created the mighty river that it now was. It would never have known what peace was or what it meant to truly live._

_So contented was the river that it did not notice its gradual slowing of tempo. It was glad of the surrounding area. Large oak and elm trees stood tall and dark against the clearest of blue skies. A warm yellow sun beamed down in friendship on the surface of the water, warming it in its glow. Animals came down to the banks to drink and bathe and birds chirped in the branches of the overarching trees. Amidst the trees there was singing; not the singing of creation, but singing of other creatures that the river could sense were present but could not see. They felt somehow familiar, as a dream that continually pervades a welcome sleep, but they were also elusive as mist through fingers. What were they?_

_For the first time the river questioned the existence of something so close. Hitherto this place, all things in creation whether known or not were merely instruments in a greater symphony, but now it paused in reflection. It was not there at the birth of existence and was new to the lands through which it flowed, but it was so very familiar, almost as close kin or something out of another life. But there was no other life, no other joy. All that the river knew was its own path, its own part in sustaining life. Still… the voices of the creatures called to it and as it listened words seemed to form. They beckoned to it with such earnestness that a great desire came over it to see what these creatures were that called out in enticing language: "Come back to us! Come back to us and be free!"_

_What could these words mean? Surely they were not for the river; without it they could not survive for the waters gave life and nourishment to all that grew and thrived upon its banks. "I'm here! I'm always here for you. Come to me and drink deep and live!" it called back to the voices, trying to reassure them of its presence. "You cannot have forgotten me; I am here, ageless before you. Look to find me, for I do not pass this way again!"_

_Already the voices were fading and the yearning to find those who were attached to the foreign song was but a memory. Once again the river was only a river, part of the world around it yet separate. It could continue its journey unhindered, unfettered by any other desires than to simply be; content for the time, joyful for eternity, ageless and unbound by the constraints of linear thinking._

_Now the scenery was changing again. The forest, though ever present, was giving way to a clearing through which the river flowed. Tall grass rippled in an almost nonexistent breeze. Wildflowers nodded sagely in the sun, petals shining white, gold, and red in its warmth. The land sloped gently up from the river bank, unmarred by any tree save a yellow willow whose branches brushed the surface of the water like a lover's first kiss. The river would have felt glad for the contact but for the great sadness that the tree conferred in that caress._

"_What is wrong, fair one?" asked the river, "Why so sad?"_

"_I weep for my friend, for his sorrow runs deep. He sits at my roots as he has for several moons and mourns the loss of his one true love."_

_Only now did the river notice the strange creature at the base of the tree. Through all the lands and years it had traveled it had seen all manners of animals and birds and insects of all sizes and colors, but this being was unlike anything it had seen before. It was hairless but for the notable exception of long blonde tresses that hung from the head that was buried in its arms. The arms wrapped themselves around two tall legs and from the very center of the figure clad in brown and green there came a voice. It was singing low and melodic and the words were unfamiliar, but a great sense of loss and grief came pouring out and down into the waters, mingling with the song the river had been singing since its formation. Sweet and tender yet full of passion and remorse, the song overwhelmed the river and for the first time since its conception, the river felt something other than its joy: compassion and a driving need to help this being. The nagging sense of familiarity that it had known in the forest of the strange singing came sweeping back, tenfold in its intensity, and this time it could not be ignored._

"_Who are you?" asked the river of the creature, mystified._

"_My name no longer matters, for I have lost the only one who ever mattered to me. My love, my all, my _melethril_." His voice was low and the words were spoken softly as if for someone held deep in the creature's heart, but the river heard them all the same._

"_If you cannot tell me who you are," the river persisted, "allow me to see your face and to know you better."_

_The creature looked up. He had large blue-grey eyes that looked as if they, like the river, had once known joy but had lost all hope of ever knowing it again. Now they were hollow, devoid of the soft light that once was held in their depths. The expression on the creature's face was bereft of any emotion, still somehow the river knew that not that long ago the creature had been full of life, wisdom, and love. The sense of familiarity again increased, and now the river had a name._

"_You are an Elf," it stated simply._

"_Yes," the Elf replied._

"_I know your face."_

"_I came often to this spot," said the Elf. "You have seen me before."_

"_Nay," answered the river, "I have never passed this way before."_

_For a moment both were silent. The Elf had no response for this, and the river was pondering something long ago forgotten. It _had_ seen this face before, but where, it knew not. Never had it seen in its long life any being that went about on two feet… and yet… and yet… _

_Something nagged at the river. A memory was trying to break free, but the river was not entirely sure it wanted to remember. It was another lifetime, something of a less-dimensional existence, long before the tears had begun to fall._

_Tears._

_It had known something other than joy, once. Pain. Longing. There had been a creature that once stood upon two legs with two arms and two hands that had grasped a head of long blonde hair in agonizing torment as the sun changed all that he was, causing him to become his tears, his tears becoming one with the waters; he was once an Elf like this being. And he was named. And the Elf now before him was named…_

"_Legolas," the river whispered._

_The Elf, who had been gazing absently across the river lost in his own thoughts, refocused his attention on the river. "How do you know me?" he asked, startled._

_Suddenly the river tired of its carefree existence. Here before it was a being he as an Elf had once loved. Memories of that other life came flooding back to him like a tidal wave: courtship and marriage to this beautiful Elf had more appeal now to him than forever living his life in the waters that knew only joy. To feel sorrow only served to heighten the joy that came after the mourning. To know of only peace and contentment was no longer enough. He, the once-Elf, needed to be released from the waters, for now they held nothing of value to him. All that his life was was meaningless if Legolas could not be a part of it._

_Gathering himself up, Haldir stepped forth from the waters, naked and shining with the waters that streamed off of him. "Good-bye, my friend," he spoke softly to the waters, "and thank you."_

_The waters murmured back, no longer singing in a language he understood. A sense of joy and well-wishes clung to him and although the song was now foreign, he knew the river was giving him its blessing. "Thank you," he repeated, and stepped up on the bank he went forward to the Elf who was watching him, incomprehension written across his face._

"_Who are you?" asked Legolas, bewildered. "Are you Ulmo, come to me in gentler form? Why come to me of all people and why now in my time of grief?"_

"_I am not Ulmo," answered the other Elf, "but one who would see you happy once again. You will find joy, Legolas," Haldir told him, gently laying a hand upon the other Elf's shoulder._

_As if the touch awakened Legolas, a look of mystified recognition mingling with hope and astonishment passed across his face. He scarce dared to believe…_

"_You," he began in a whispered voice, "you were dead!"_

"_You know me then?" Haldir asked, hopeful._

"_Know you? Can the meadows dare ask if the grass knows it? Can the tree ask if the leaves remember it? You… you were everything to me. We were one, you and I. Haldir…" Legolas breathed._

_At the sound of his name Haldir's heart leapt within him. "Yes," he exclaimed, "it is I! I who have loved you since first laying eyes upon you. I have journeyed long through many lands and never knew what I was looking for until I saw you. You are my reason for living, Legolas."_

"Melethnin_…" Legolas breathed, guiding Haldir's head to his own so that their foreheads were touching. "I thought I had lost you."_

"_Never, _meleth_." Haldir whispered, ignoring the guilt that swelled within his breast. Had he not accidentally come upon his love, he would have never remembered… "As long as I live I pledge my love to you. You alone hold my heart, forever and always. May death be the only thing to separate us." Leaning in, he kissed the tip of the other Elf's nose. _

"_Haldir," Legolas groaned, a tear escaping his eye._

"_Shh…" comforted Haldir, leaning in to kiss the tear away, "It's okay. I'm here now." Moving his head over, he placed feather-light kisses on the side of Legolas's mouth, trailing them to his ear. There he nuzzled Legolas, burying his head in his neck._

_Legolas sighed, his emotions finally breaking as Haldir placed heated lips on his neck, his lobe, the tip of his pointed ear. Silently the tears streamed down his face, his eyes closed against all that he thought he had lost. Noticing these tears, Haldir placed his hands on either side of Legolas's head and with his thumbs wiped them away. He studied Legolas's face intently, drinking in his beauty, allowing the cleansing tears to fall. For a long time he sat like this, holding his love in his hands, watching for any sign from the Elf that signaled his acceptance of the reality before him._

_After some time – Haldir could not guess how much – Legolas slowly opened his eyes and looked upon Haldir's worried face. "I'm all right," said Legolas, and closing the small space between them he crushed his lips against Haldir's._

_At first the kiss lingered gently, but with increasing hunger on both their parts it deepened, each Elf trying to dive deeper into the other's soul through that kiss. All that Legolas had felt he tried to tell through the joining of their mouths; all the bitterness and loss and love that had brought him to the riverside became passion and heat. Everything that Haldir hoped to forget – his guilt, his life without Legolas – merged with his joy at having found him again. Their tongues dueled hotly, their arms embraced around each other, each feeling the other in desperate attempts to assure themselves that this was truly real._

_Haldir bore Legolas to the ground, the earth softer than the hard bark of the ancient willow. He broke their kiss, causing Legolas to whimper softly at the loss. Looking down upon the other Elf, his eyes shone out his love. "_Amin mela lle (I love you), _Legolas_."

"Amin mela lle, _Haldir_," _Legolas replied, gazing up at Haldir, his eyes shining. He studied the grey eyes intently for a long moment before reaching up and pulling Haldir into another kiss, smiling against his lips before pushing his tongue against the barrier of teeth. Haldir answered his unspoken request and allowed Legolas entrance and once again their tongues tangled. This time it was Haldir's turn to moan, feelings erupting in him that so short a time before he could never have imagined existed. A passionate hot flame rose from his loins and surged through his entire being, the heat so intense it rivaled the very sun. Breaking the kiss he looked down upon his beloved. "Let me see you," he rasped._

_Legolas smiled almost coquettishly, causing another swell of emotion to burst in Haldir. Slowly, as if to tease the other Elf, Legolas reached down and pulled his tunic over his head, exposing his bare chest to Haldir._

"_You're perfect," said Haldir breathlessly as he drank in the sight of smooth white skin that shone with the inner light of the sun. "Absolutely perfect."_

"_You're not so bad looking yourself," Legolas teased back, running a finger ever so lightly across Haldir's chest._

"_Meleth!" panted Haldir at the touch on his overly sensitive skin, "Do not torment so!"_

"_Do not torment you?" asked Legolas with a mischievous glint in his eye. "How am I tormenting you? Surely not by this," he ran his finger down Haldir's chest and over the well defined muscles of his abdomen, "or this," he added as he ran his fingers even lower and tracing a line above Haldir's most private place, causing Haldir to gasp._

"_That's it," Haldir growled, and pressing his body to Legolas's he crushed his mouth upon the other Elf's. He could feel Legolas's arousal through the thin fabric of Legolas's leggings rubbing against his own and the sensation nearly pushed him over the edge. Determined not to give in, however, he scooted down and away from the lips of the Elf who so captivated him. He trailed light kisses down the gorgeous neck, running his tongue over the hot skin, drinking in the fragrance and taste of him. It reminded Haldir of sweet honeysuckle and lilacs, the delicate nectar of which surely must come from Eru himself._

_Coming to the expanse of Legolas's chest, Haldir did not stop his ministrations. One nipple he circled with his fingers, teasing it into a hard nub while the other he took in his mouth, allowing his tongue to circle it in much the same way causing Legolas to arch beneath him. Haldir, ignoring the moans he was eliciting, continued in this fashion for many long minutes, simply savoring the delicate flavor of the Elf._

_Suddenly this taste was not enough. Not wanting to hurry, however, Haldir slowly dragged his mouth away from Legolas's nipple and allowed his tongue to dance lightly across the surface of the Elf's stomach until he reached the navel. Darting his tongue in and out of that small crevice, he mimicked the more intimate motions he was yearning to indulge in. With one hand still teasing a nipple, Haldir permitted himself the luxury of dipping his other hand underneath Legolas's leggings. Finding the warmth he sought there, he allowed his fingers to explore the hardness there until Legolas started gasping for him to stop._

"_What's wrong, meleth?" Haldir asked, stopping his ministrations abruptly, concern written all over his face._

"_Nothing!" Legolas rasped, trying to regain his breath. "What you are doing to me… it's incredible! But I need more. I need you inside me, meleth!"_

_A slow grin came over Haldir's face. "You are impatient, my prince!" he exclaimed wickedly. Without any further comment, he tugged the leggings off Legolas, exposing the sensitive column to the cool air. Legolas arched off the ground, inviting Haldir to enter him. Tempting though it was, Haldir refrained and instead wrapped his mouth around the organ. Massaging it with his tongue brought Legolas to his ecstasy and for a moment the two Elves lay together, Haldir's head resting easily on Legolas's lower stomach, content to be with his love. Legolas was toying with his hair, the sun was warm upon their naked bodies, and all was right in the world. Surely such bliss was only possible in dreams, wasn't it?_

"_Meleth," whispered Legolas, "that was amazing. I never knew love until you came into my life. I never understood passion or music or what it meant to be alive until you showed me. I can never repay you for such an incredible gift, but I offer all of what I am to you in pitiable exchange."_

"_Hush," answered Haldir soothingly, "You do yourself an injustice. I was a shell of what I could be until you called me out of the waters and reminded me of something I'd forgotten: love. For I love you, with my whole being, and I would be content to worship your body for the rest of our lives if only you'll let me."_

"_Let you?" cried Legolas, sitting up abruptly, causing Haldir's head to spill from his body. "_Let_ you cause me more pleasure than I could ever imagine? Haldir, meleth-nin, as I told you on our wedding day, you have me forever and nothing – _nothing _– will stop my love for you. Even the Valar themselves could not separate us, so devoted am I to you."_

"_Oh Legolas," sighed Haldir sitting up to look at the other Elf in his eye, "that's all I ever wanted. As you are mine, I am yours."_

_Slowly he leaned forward and captured Legolas's lips in a delicate kiss that soon gave way to more violent passions. The two Elves, oblivious of all else around them, soon found themselves once again in the situation where Legolas was begging Haldir to enter him. This time Haldir needed no encouragement; once he prepared Legolas's body for his intrusion, he slipped easily inside of him. Slowly with building intensity body met body, Legolas meeting each of Haldir's thrusts with equal abandon until each one peaked and their bodies ceased their movement. For many minutes they lay there unspeaking but completely in tune with each other, Haldir still inside Legolas, reluctant to leave the warmth that surrounded him._

_All too soon, however, both Haldir and Legolas became aware that they were not alone. The river, as if by some dark will of its own, had risen and was lapping at their feet. Unlike its prior beckoning that was cool and gentle and full of gladness, this was a cold, harsh demand, commanding Haldir to rejoin with it._

"_No!" Haldir cried aloud in response to the silent pressing of the river. "You cannot have me!"_

"_You will join with us. It is your destiny." The voice was dark and foreboding._

"_You're wrong. _Legolas_ is my destiny. I will never submit."_

"_If you do not come by choice, we are prepared to use force."_

"_Never. Nothing you can do or say will entice me to come." Haldir stated loudly but firmly, not allowing the alarm that was rising in his chest to be heard in his voice or seen in his countenance._

_Haldir's words seemed as a signal to the river. Up until this point the water had been dark and the surface choppy but now it started to churn and writhe as if in pain, violent in its wrath. A cold wind sprung up and started whipping the Elves' long hair against their bare skin, causing welts to rise and eyes to sting. The sun which had been so friendly just moments before was now covered in foreboding clouds which seemed as a herald of some dark fate._

"_Legolas!" screamed Haldir almost frantically, trying to be heard over the howling of the wind. "Hold on to me! I – I'm slipping. I can't… I can't stay firm. Don't let me go!" With this final plea Haldir felt something cold grab his ankle. It was a hand, dark with the stains of mud and dried blood, its nails cracked and oozing something that resembled tar. Haldir fought against it, but the Orc-like being that held him yanked him roughly against the now hardened ground, pulling him into the river._

"_Legolas! Meleth-nin! Don't let me go!"_

"Haldir!" _The voice of his beloved seemed oddly soft and calm, as if it transcended all of Arda and was apart from the chaos that surrounded them._

"_Don't let them take me!" Haldir was close to a panic. "I can't… I can't fight them! Meleth!"_

"So stop fighting."

_At these words Haldir froze. How could his love let him go so easily? How had this Elf have been mourning him so deeply mere hours ago when he thought he was dead suddenly now stop caring?_

"_Meleth-nin! Please… doesn't our love mean anything? Will you watch as I am taken from you?" Haldir pleaded, his hope waning as he spoke._

"Haldir, it's okay. You're safe."

_Haldir was now halfway submerged in the dark waters, but its frigidity did not seem to affect the Elf. Instead he started flailing, trying to fight off his attackers. He was being pulled down by the pawing hands of armies of creatures so loathsome that Orcs themselves would be repulsed. But all this terror around him was not as terrible as what he saw on the land which caused him once again to cease his motion. _

_Legolas, who moments before had been swearing his fidelity to only Haldir, was now in the arms of another Man. Where he came from or who he was, Haldir could not guess. But as they stood there together, the winds around them ceased and the sun shone above them as if it was announcing its approval. They seem suspended in a place of peace, completely unaware of the raging storm about them. The Man who had shoulder-length brown hair and a cropped beard held Legolas as Haldir once did. Legolas was gazing back up at the taller Man with adoration clearly outlined in every angle of his face. As Haldir looked on horrified the Man bent down and oh so gently placed a kiss on Legolas's forehead before tilting the Elf's chin up to meet his lips in the most tender of kisses. _

_It was that moment that Haldir became aware that the waters were closing in about his neck and that soon he would be submerged. Trying one last time to free himself, Haldir kicked and pushed at the creatures holding him. "Legolas!" he screamed desperate to regain the Elf's attention. "Meleth-nin!"_

_The other Elf never responded. He seemed not to notice that his husband was being taken away. As the waters covered his head the last thing he saw was Legolas throwing his arms about the Man and placing a kiss against the nape of the Man's neck where his head had rested last._

"Haldir." _Once again Haldir heard the soothing voice of his beloved, seemingly coming from somewhere above. Despite the fact that he had lost the battle against the river and its icy, bone-chilling waters were completely filling his senses, Haldir heard his love's voice._

"Legolas?" _he croaked, feeling defeated yet oddly hopeful._

"Yes, it is I." _The voice sounded somehow relieved. _"It's okay now. You're safe. It's time to let go."

"I can't."

"Yes you can. Open your eyes."

Reluctantly, Haldir did as he was told. He found himself in bed under more blankets than were probably necessary. It was a comfortably sized room with a wardrobe on one side of the room and double doors on the wall opposite the bed. Two unfamiliar Elves stood in one corner and Legolas was sitting beside the bed holding Haldir's cool hand in his warm one. Morning sunlight streaming in the window and Haldir could hear the gentle chirping of a morning lark outside.

Feeling completely confused at this abrupt change of environment, the first thing that came to his mind popped from his lips. "Where am I?" he asked.

Legolas smiled, relief clearly written on his face. "You are in the palace of King Thranduil in the realm of Mirkwood."

Haldir remained silent for a moment, allowing himself to adjust to his surroundings. Only a moment ago he was in an entirely different world, one that was in some way more real to him than this world ever was. The colors were sharper, the smells more intense, and the elements somehow more alive than here. The entire experience now resided in his memory as actual events, no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that it was just a dream – for now he realized that was what it was – he simply could not accept it. He could still feel the intense heat of the sun, the cool fluidity of his body merging with the river until he _became_ the river, the journey that seemed timeless, the grassy knoll where he and Legolas made love –

Oh Valar! He could remember hearing Legolas's voice as it permeated his dream and now… now he knew that it was Legolas really responding to him in real life. Did that mean he had been speaking aloud? If so, how much did these Elves – and _Legolas_ – hear?

Sending a quick plea to whatever powers were listening than he did not do something unintentionally rash, Haldir thrust aside the memories of that place and fought to find something to distract him from these mortifying realizations.

"What happened? How long have I been out?" he finally asked.

"You collapsed in the kitchens," Legolas answered, "and to answer your second question, you've been asleep for four days."

"Four days!" gasped Haldir, sitting upright in astonishment. Whether it was amazement at the fact that he could possibly sleep that long or if it was that the events he had just lived through took place in so short a time he could not tell.

"Yes," smiled Legolas, "four days. We've been trying to wake you, but it seemed as if every time we did you only sank deeper into your sleep."

"How did this happen?" asked Haldir.

"Tell me, do you remember having any dreams?" Legolas replied.

At the question memories that were hovering so close to the surface of Haldir's mind came flooding back to him with crystalline clarity. He tried to suppress the heat he felt rising to his cheeks and the feelings stirring in him, but was only partially successful. "Yes," he responded, "I remember them quite vividly. They were rather strange, actually."

"Just as we thought." Was that a smirk on Legolas's face? "We believe you were a victim of the Enchanted River."

That made sense. What did not make sense, however, was how this could have happened. Haldir remembered that there was a goblet which he spilled on himself; surely this must have been water from that river, but how it came to be in that cup, he could not guess.

"In a way," Legolas continued teasingly, "we have much to thank you for. You inadvertently answered the great riddle of what was wrong with my father with your clumsiness."

At the reminder of the king's collapse Haldir felt a wave of concern rush through his body that was soon replaced by hope. "Do you mean he was only asleep? Which means he must have awoken by now!" A feeling of excitement ran through him before he saw the look on Legolas's face that dashed his exuberance.

"No, he still sleeps," Legolas replied. "Unlike you, he did not merely come in contact with the water, he ingested it. It's more potent when it's inside you, and he may be out for some time to come."

"Oh." Haldir did not know what else to say.

"But now we know it's not serious, so thank you, Haldir!" Legolas said lightly.

"You're welcome, I guess," chuckled Haldir, "though I suppose it will be long before you think of me as anything but the most ungraceful Elf you ever met."

"Now that you bring it up," hinted Legolas slyly, "you may very well be correct. But tell me. What sort of dreams did you have? Be honest…"

_888888888888888888888888_

_Meanwhile while Haldir was asleep, elsewhere in the land…_

"It is done as you wished," the Wild Man said, bowing before his master. "The king is fallen and the prince has met with the Dwarves. Your plan is falling into place."

"Perfect," the master said, an evil gleam reflecting in his eyes. "Now all we have to do is wait…"

To be continued…

_A/N: While I found no record of water from the Enchanted River having different effects on people whether they touch it vs. drink it, for the purpose of this story it will._


	5. A Decision Is Made

Two months had passed and still Thranduil slept on. Legolas was beginning to feel concerned again. While there was little precedent to go by regarding his father's case and it was true that ingestion of the waters from the Enchanted River caused abnormally deep sleep, Legolas could not help feeling like the enchantment should have run its course by now. Surely the king had been purged of those waters by now; and yet no one in the course of the history of the Elves had ever studied how the river worked. It simply was what it was, what it had always been: a place of deep magic over which the Elves held no power. Occasionally a youngling or foreigner to the land not realizing it to be dangerous might mistake the river as a good place to bathe or swim, but Mirkwood Elves knew better than that and therefore gave it the respect it deserved. It was crossed with great care and Elves never transported the water; there simply was no need to.

So how, then, did this water end up in the hands of the king? And why? Some sort of deviltry must be involved. This was far too specific for it to be a mere accident. Someone must have taken special care to retrieve the water, bring it so far as the palace, and make sure it reached the king without coming into direct contact with it. The whole scenario smacked of treason. Maybe it was a deliberate attack from the _Yrchs_ but that kind of subtlety was not their style, nor were they that intelligent. Something this covert took skill and planning, but Legolas could think of no one who would have such a motivation to hurt the king. It was deliberate and cunning, yes, but also mystifying. Anyone who took such special care in this deliberate an attack must surely know of the river's properties; they could not kill the king with it, so why go through all this trouble?

If something, some scheme, had been planned to occur while the kingdom's ruler was out of the way, surely something would have happened by now. Even the attacker would know this to be a temporary condition, so why, if it truly was part of some larger plan, had nothing happened yet? Legolas was getting tired of waiting and frustrated with the lack of answers.

The investigation had stalled once Haldir had fallen subject to the sedative nature of the water. As soon as Haldir had been attended to Legolas lost no time in questioning the entire staff, from the lowliest kitchen _elleth_ who prepared the food to the servers, guards, cooks, and anyone else Legolas came across who might be able to provide any information, no matter now insignificant it might seem. Anything at all could be a potential clue to this mystery. Unfortunately, infuriatingly, no answers had turned up.

Speculation and suspicion were running rampant in the palace. During the past fortnight Legolas had heard stories grow in increasing absurdity. What had begun as the truthful whisperings of the king's – followed shortly by the visiting Lothlórien's – collapse soon grew into stories of a plot against the throne (which Legolas still suspected, though all he had was circumstancial evidence) to the current favorite: King Thranduil had not in fact been the unsuspecting recipient of ingested enchanted water but rather was not even entirely of Elven blood and the part of him that was mortal had surfaced due to prolonged stress. The king, who had been secretly having a discrete affair with the King Under the Mountain, had finally succumbed to his guilt over such an unnatural union and staged this incident so that he could do one of two things, depending on which rumor one chose to believe. Either the king had given into his lust and had staged this "accident" in order to spend time with his lover (which clearly explained why the Dwarf contingency was still hanging around) or else the king, so overcome with shame of his actions, had staged this reported attack so that he could give into his mortality and die in peace. According to this second version the king had gone to the Halls of Mandos and Legolas, in his despair and anger, was holding the Dwarves captive until he was officially crowned king and could thereby order their sentencing.

Legolas sighed wearily and rolled his eyes at the ridiculousness of it all. Yes, he was angry; his father had been attacked, as well as a visiting Galadhrim, however accidental it might have been. Legolas thumped a closed fist on his father's desk where he had been spending increasing amounts of time as temporary ruler of Mirkwood. At least his anger was justified. _'Though' _Legolas mused, _'I suppose were these ludicrous rumors true, my anger would still be justified.'_

The idea of his father in an illicit affair with not only a member of the race of Dwarves but another male would be laughable if Legolas was not so very sick of the wagging tongues. Thranduil himself would be absolutely appalled at the rumors going around. Always proper, he never would have an affair with anyone, but _especially_ with one of the same gender. Such relationships he condemned so vehemently that no one could hold any reasonable conversation with him on the subject. If someone not as conservative as he tried to present their views, a vein started throbbing dangerously in the king's neck and he would steadily turn from red to purple as his exuberance on the subject seemed to cut off his air supply.

No, the king would not appreciate such speculations as were going around. Legolas prayed that when – not if – Thranduil woke up he would never learn of what was being said of him. This, Legolas knew, was wistful thinking; being immortal, surrounded by immortals, chances were that he would find out eventually. Legolas sincerely hoped that he would be far removed from the kingdom when that happened. He would rather face a hundred _Yrch_ alone than to deal with his father's rage. Especially since ultimately Thranduil would find an outlet for his fury in blaming his son for allowing such things to be circulating while Legolas was ruling. As the reigning authority in the kingdom, Legolas was now therefore responsible for everything in the land, even those things that were obviously out of his control.

Valar knew Legolas had tried to quash the rumors. Meeting after meeting with the public had not assuaged their fears. Not only had he sent out statement after statement proclaiming the truth of the situation and gave regular updates as to the king's current and unchanging condition, he had also issued several pleas for any information that could lead to some answers. No one had come forward and no amount of correct information given seemed to overpower the rumors.

While the race of Elves was not ordinarily prone to speculation and gossip it would seem that after so many centuries of relative tranquility among their people an internal scandal was too great to pass up. Or perhaps the presence of so many foreigners more prone to such behavior was what truly perpetuated the stories. After all, in addition to the party from Erebor there also were a number of Men from Dale and other areas abroad. With so many disturbances throughout Middle-Earth, peoples were starting to join together and form or re-forge alliances with one another and Mirkwood had become a common meeting place of people. It was an ideal breeding ground for untruths.

Legolas sighed. While he had plenty of strength of character and much experience fighting bands of _Yrch_ during the course of his life, never before had the responsibilities of ruling a kingdom been thrust upon him like this. Without knowing how long the king would be in his present condition, perhaps it was time he followed the example of his kin and sought to join forces with those long estranged. The Dwarves might not have a recent friendship with the Elves – indeed, the animosity between their people had only been growing in the past few centuries – but the enemy of the Enemy was an ally and petty differences ought to be put aside in the face of a larger threat. The visiting Dwarves, while primarily motivated by wounded pride and greed, did make a valid point. A dragon certainly was a threat to more than the uprooted Dwarves.

A knock on the door interrupted Legolas's meandering musings.

"Come in," offered Legolas in a commanding tone.

The door pushed open to reveal one of his father's guards. "I'm sorry to disturb you, Prince Legolas," he began, "The Galadhrim Haldir is seeking an audience with you. Shall I show him in?"

Legolas fought the goofy grin that threatened to come to his face the moment he heard Haldir's name. Really, what was the matter with him? Fixing his features in what he hoped was an unconcerned expression, Legolas responded simply, "Please do."

"Very good, sire," the guard answered, bowing out of the room. A moment later the door reopened and Haldir stepped in. Tall and graceful, the Elf seemed to fill the king's office with a soft warm glow. Legolas was suddenly very aware of what a lovely day it was outside as the sun streamed in through the window, illuminating the golden locks of the other occupant of the room.

Realizing that his thoughts were once again leading him astray and that he was staring with perhaps a more welcoming grin on his face than he intended, Legolas cleared his throat and smiled in what he hoped was a friendly-but-not-too-friendly way. "Haldir!" he exclaimed delighted, "To what do I owe this honor?"

Haldir returned the smile, his insides becoming used to the rush of adrenalin coursing through his veins that set his stomach to fluttering every time he saw the prince. Because he was used to this he also hoped that he was able to adequately conceal his excitement from him.

The first few weeks after he had awoken from his enchanted sleep he had found the prince's presence rather uncomfortable, to say the least. As with all dreams given by the Enchanted River, his dreams were no less potently remembered than any other of the river's victims. Embarrassment and guilt mixed with longing came flooding over him every time he looked at Legolas, heard his voice, or overheard his name in conversation. Each time he looked at the subject of his dreams caused a slight discomfort in his leggings which he worried was apparent to anyone in the room with him. The dreams (truly were they only dreams?) were so intensely real that it was hard to separate truth – that he was a visiting stranger and barely knew the prince – from the fantasy: that he had spent an entire lifetime with the Elf, his mate and love of his life that he would trade the greatest joy in the world to be with. Such intensity of emotions from the dreams filled his waking being and no longer could he deny his attraction to Legolas. What was once a dream now became a hope for the future and Haldir could hardly bear being torn from his dream-state reality.

But Haldir was also by nature a realist. Despite everything in his being that told him the contrary he knew cognitively that there could be no romantic future with the prince. He was in the minority of those attracted to the same gender and from what he knew of Legolas (and Thranduil for that matter), the prince was not. So sadly, reluctantly, Haldir learned to bury his feelings for the fair _élan_ but determined to remain good friends with him nonetheless. Now, months after waking to his old life, he had finally made peace with his dreams and could be in the same room as the prince. He could control the butterflies that threatened to make him breathless and nervous. So that now, in this present moment, he could return the prince's warm greeting without any perceivable uneasiness. He hoped.

"Legolas," Haldir said warmly back to the prince, "it is good to see you as well, though I do wish I came with better tidings."

For a moment Legolas paled. "Is it Adar?" he asked hesitantly.

"No, there is no change," answered Haldir, mentally kicking himself for making the prince think such things. "This is nothing that serious. I was just coming to inform you that the Dwarves had approached me earlier today as I was out in the gardens and asked me to relay to you their desire for another meeting." Seeing the annoyed look that passed like a shadow over Legolas's face he quickly added, "Also I came to see if I could offer you any assistance or counsel on this subject, should you need a friendly ear."

"Haldir, you are too good to me," Legolas said almost wistfully. "You come into this kingdom a stranger and yet you have offered so much of yourself in matters that should be of no concern or consequence to you. We offer our hospitality to you and instead you end up investigating an attack against my father and fall victim of the Enchanted River. You are here to reestablish old ties between our kin and to learn of the movements of the Enemy and instead all you get is the worries of our own kingdom. Yet you have been more than supportive and helpful and a true friend throughout and despite all of this. How can I thank you enough?"

"You don't need to," mumbled Haldir, feeling embarrassed by such high and unexpected praise. "We are family, are we not? Were trouble to come to Lothlórien during a visit from you, would you not do the same for us?"

Legolas smiled a gentle half-smile. "I suppose you are right, Haldir," he said quietly, "I did not mean to embarrass you. I just hope you know that I truly appreciate everything you have done for us in these past few months."

'_Everything I've done for _you_,' _Haldir mentally corrected. "Thank you, my prince," he said aloud. "And I mean my offer: if I can be of any assistance to you right now you have but to ask."

"Sit down, Haldir," Legolas answered, suddenly aware that both he and his friend were still standing. "The truth is, I could use an ear right now."

"You have it then," answered Haldir, his insides singing as he took a seat opposite the desk from Legolas.

Sitting himself, Legolas took a deep breath as if trying to cleanse himself of negativity before proceeding. Letting the breath out he said, "Haldir, I know we have only known each other for a short time, but I consider you a true friend. I want you to know that because ordinarily I would not unload on a guest as I am about to do."

"Of course." Haldir answered. "The feeling is mutual."

This answer seemed to relax Legolas. "Thank you. I am so unused to having to deal with running a kingdom, much less an investigation into an attack against my father, much less dealing with Dwarves who seem far too eager to make friends now that it is most advantageous to them. My father's advisors and I don't exactly see eye to eye. I think I shall always be to them the quarrelsome, undisciplined son of their king." Here Legolas paused. "You look confused."

"A little," admitted Haldir, "I thought you had a good relationship with your father."

"Hardly." Legolas retorted. "It may seem so to visitors and the public, but… well, we do not get along so well behind closed doors. And those closest to my father naturally see me as he does. Hence the reason I have not confided in them. My own friends I've known since childhood I have spoken with many times, as you well know, but most of them are not in any positions of any significant amounts of responsibility. I understand that in Lórien you command border patrols, much as I do here. So really, you are the best one to talk to."

"Legolas, you're babbling."

Legolas had the good grace to blush. "I'm sorry. I just wanted you to know how things really stand here."

"Ah," replied Haldir understandingly, "I see. Go on."

"Despite the difference of opinion we share, my father is a fair Elf," Legolas began. "His rule is marked by peace and he does his best to listen to anyone who has a request they bring before his throne. And while he, like all Elves, does not necessarily trust the Dwarves, they came to him with a request and he was sitting down with them when the attack happened. And now suddenly I am faced with a decision that was never mine to make: Do we, the Elves of Mirkwood, go to war against an almost unbeatable foe for the sake of these people we normally would not help? Would my father? Should I wait longer for him to wake up? I have no idea when that will be. Is it fair to the Dwarves to keep putting their request on hold on the off-chance that today will be the day my father awakens? But I do not know what my father would do. And I fear that, were I to give the Dwarves a final answer, it would be the wrong one. My father," here he paused with an ironic smile touching the corners of his mouth, "delights in thinking that I am incapable of holding the responsibilities of ruling over a kingdom."

Legolas, who had been leaning back in the chair with a far-off look on his face, now suddenly leaned forward, rested his elbows on the desk and steepled his fingers in front of him. "Haldir, this could be the chance I've been waiting for to prove my father wrong."

Haldir nodded. "Yes," he agreed slowly, "but do not allow your desires to prove yourself to your father get in the way of what best to do."

Legolas sighed, sounding frustrated again. Folding his hands on his lap he once again leaned back. "You're right, of course. You're always right. And I'm trying to keep that in mind as I'm deliberating. As much as I am loathe to admit this – and you are not to repeat this to anyone – I want to be the kind of leader that my father is: fair and equitable. Is it fair to send the Elves to war and certain death to rid this area of a dragon at the request of the Dwarves, who see so much to gain for themselves but offer little in return? Can I condemn my father's armies to this fate? But can I turn my back on those who have come in search of my father's help and who, despite the dislike between our peoples, have reached out to form an alliance in these ever darkening times?"

At this point Legolas stood, went to the window, and looked out over the gardens. "It is selfish of me to wish my father had never fallen ill so that I would not have to deal with this," he offered quietly, as if sharing some great secret. "This kingdom was not meant to be without its leader in time of war. I fear that if I step up and offer our assistance to the Dwarves it will be as if I am giving up on my father's recovery. With all the rumors circulating, this is not the time to play king. Those who are weaker minded will believe the king to be dead and I do not command the trust of the court as my father does. This could tear the kingdom apart."

Haldir waited patiently for Legolas to continue his musings, but for the moment the prince remained silent. Finally he broke the stillness. "Legolas," he began, "it seems to me that you have already made your decision. Wait for the king to wake up. You are under no obligation to the Dwarves, but you are to your kingdom. The Dwarves can wait. Their treasure will still be there as long as the dragon remains."

Legolas turned towards Haldir, a weary smile on his face. "You are wise, Haldir of Lothlórien." He paused while he returned to his place behind the desk. "Yes, you are correct. Now is not the time to be going to war. Now is the time to serve the king in the best way possible until he returns to power. Thank you for pointing this out to me."

Reaching across the desk he grasped Haldir's forearm in a friendly manner. Haldir, surprised at such a familiar greeting, returned the handshake. "I'm glad I could help." He paused a moment in consideration. "Though it does seem as if all I did was listen."

"Sometimes," smiled Legolas warmly, "that is enough."

A brief moment elapsed in friendly silence. In those few seconds it seemed to Haldir that something passed between them. Not so much a romantic spark but rather a recognition of kinship, a realization of brotherhood. For the first time since coming to Mirkwood and meeting the prince, Haldir felt no rush of attraction at the touch of the other's hand. Instead a surge of wellness flooded through his system. It was as if this brief moment had somehow transformed their friendship into something richer, deeper, than casual friends usually feel.

Legolas felt this connection pass between the two of them as well. A sense of completion with this now true-friend filled his senses. Here was his brother and boon companion. There would be no one else like Haldir in his life and whatever the future held, he knew Haldir was going to be an integral part of it.

It was only a few seconds in time, but for the two Elves sitting there it seemed as if everything was suspended as each acknowledged each other and what was passing through them. Then the moment passed and time resumed.

"Guard!" called Legolas in a much more cheerful mood than a few minutes prior.

The guard walked in. "Yes, Prince Legolas?"

"Find the Dwarves for me. Tell them I have made my decision."

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The evening sun was reflecting light upon the white walls of the king's bedchamber, casting the room in an ethereal light. Supper had been attended to in the dining hall and now the sounds of Elvesong were filtering down the hallway, giving the prince sitting there an unusual sense of calm. After a rather fuller day than ordinary, Legolas was glad to be sitting peacefully at his father's side.

A wry smile touched the corners of Legolas's mouth momentarily. _Is this what it takes, Adar, to be able to be with you without arguing? You taking to your bed for months at a time?_ The reflection struck Legolas as grimly amusing before chiding himself for such disloyal thoughts. His father was right; he was not cut out to rule this kingdom and could never rule as his father did. He was much more content among the trees and living things of the wood, singing tales of his people, or even in battle against the _Yrch_. The world of politics and diplomacy was strange to him and for the first time in his life, Legolas felt like he finally understood his father, if only slightly. A growing respect for the Elf lying silent on the bed was emerging in the prince. Now, more than ever, he wished his father was there, ready and able to take over for him.

Legolas thought dimly that he should feel shame at this realization, knowing that all this time his father might just be right about him. But more overpowering than that was the feeling of broken pride; he, proud and unshakable in his beliefs, now suddenly had to bow to his father's wise assessment of him and acknowledge that he, Legolas was wrong. But he would gladly face this humility if only his father would awaken and resume his role as leader of the realm.

Thinking back over the afternoon seemed to confirm everything Legolas had just been musing. Once the Dwarves had been gathered, Legolas sat down with them as his father did; a simple meal was laid for them in the Great Hall with plenty of wine to go around.

_Legolas was already seated at the head of the table when the Dwarves filed in. Against his nature he remained seated as his guests took their seats; to rise in their presence would only weaken him as ruling authority._

"_Welcome to my table," Legolas opened._

"_Thank you, Prince Legolas," responded Thrór with equal civility._

_Legolas inclined his head in acknowledgement before continuing. "I do apologize for the delay in responding to your request and I thank you for your patience. These have been trying times for the kingdom and I would be remiss as acting king if I did not give my full attention to these matters."_

"_Understandable," Thrór responded tightly, as if the polite façade pained him._

_Legolas smiled inwardly. He could tell that the Dwarf king was barely containing his true emotions and mentally applauded him for his much improved court manner since first they met. Outwardly Legolas's face was a carefully studied mask that made it impossible for the Dwarves to read the answer they had so long awaited. _

_"I realize that these too are trying times for your people and the Men of Dale," Legolas continued his prepared speech, "I have not forgotten this in light of our own troubles. Indeed, I have spent many an hour pondering your situation and request. Is it right for me, son of the ruler of Mirkwood, to issue such a decree as you ask? Shall I be the one to send my father's armies against an impossible foe? Yet can I ignore your plea when now is the time to start to make amends? Dark times are coming; the Watchful Peace has ended and the White Council has been formed. Even within these walls it can be felt; rumors are circulating among my people that show great misgivings. Both in regards to the matters at hand here, but also of matters abroad. Including yours."_

_Legolas regarded each Dwarf sitting at the table with a critical eye. This was the first time he had actually been with the entire party in one place. In their faces he read anticipation and an almost smug look, as if they thought they knew where this speech was headed. "_Foolish, hard-headed creatures_," Legolas thought to himself. Their own pride and greed would be their ruin._

_Steeling himself for the reaction he knew was coming he continued. "Yes, it is indeed a time to be forging new friendships. In light of this I hope that we may continue what has begun here in this room; cooperation between our peoples would be a mighty blow against the Enemy." At this all the Dwarves leaned in with expectant smiles. Looking unwaveringly into Thrór's eyes he dealt the final blow. "Unfortunately, I cannot do as you ask."_

"WHAT?_" roared the Dwarves simultaneously before erupting into loud, angry shouting. Thrór stood and pounded his fists on the table while glaring at the still seated Elf. _"If looks could kill,"_ Legolas thought almost amusedly. He had known what the reaction to his verdict was going to be ahead of time; he had prepared himself for the worse._

"_You… you…" Here Thrór spit out an unrecognizable Dwarvish word Legolas surmised he was probably better off not knowing. "How can this be your answer?"_

_Remaining calm Legolas looked directly in the Dwarf's eyes. "It is not my place to send my people to war. If we were fighting a common Enemy, then yes, I would have done so without my father's blessing. But he is still ruler of this land and as such he is the only one who can authorize such an act." At this Thrór huffed, his rage seeming to cut off his speech in his throat. "I am sorry, King Thrór, that is my answer. I will not be responsible for sending the Elves to their deaths." In spite of the Dwarves' fury and unwillingness to listen Legolas pressed on. "I am, however, willing and able to lend whatever support I can – short of sending our armies – to your cause. If you need food, water, weapons, armor, or other assistance, we will gladly give it to you and the Men of Dale."_

"_What good is your offer if only a handful of us go to war?" Thrór roared, finally regaining use of his vocal chords. "Your offer is meaningless!"_

"_I am sorry you feel that way," answered Legolas smoothly. "If you change your mind, I will be awaiting your decision." With that he stood, and gracefully as he could, he left the table._

That was when all hell broke loose. Even now as he reflected on the following events, Legolas could not see what exactly had happened. All he knew was that he was, for the first time in his life, grateful to the palace guards and their protectiveness of the royal family. If not for them Legolas might himself be laid up on his own bed. Someone had grabbed him, that much he knew, and the well intended meal had become weapons thrown about the room.

"Oh Ada," Legolas whispered, bending his head so that his forehead touched the king's. "Did I do the right thing? Should I have listened to the Dwarves?"

At this moment Thranduil stirred and murmured. Legolas looked up, shock and hope mingling on his face. "Ada?" he whispered, barely trusting his senses.

"Legolas." Thranduil breathed. "Legolas. Do as they ask, Legolas."

"Ada?" Legolas questioned louder, excitement echoing in his voice. But the king had already returned to his slumber, a small smile on his lips.

"Ada!" Legolas shouted, shaking his father in a futile attempt to reawaken him.

"Legolas?" a voice called from the doorway.

Knowing the speaker without turning Legolas answered with a frantic energy, not taking his eyes off his father. "Revion! He was awake just a moment ago! He spoke to me!"

Revion entered the room and took a seat next to his friend. "Are you sure?" he asked gently.

Exasperated Legolas sighed dramatically. "Of course I'm sure! He opened his eyes, looked right at me, and spoke. But then he was gone again."

"What did he say?" asked Revion curiously.

At this question Legolas started as if his father's words were just now registering. "Revion," he said looking at his friend with his voice in his throat, "find a messenger to find the Dwarves. Find Daugion. Tell him to prepare the army. The Elves are going to war."

To be continued…


	6. Making ready

A/N: I meant to include this note in the last chapter. I apologize for such a huge delay in my updating over the spring. I was out of the country and did not have the opportunity I thought I would to update this story. I am back now, though, and look forward to updating with more regularity. Thank you for your patience… and moreover, thank you for coming back :) Additionally I'd like to add that while I will not withhold an update if I don't get reviews, I just like to say thank you to those of you who do take the time to review. It means so much! Thank you!

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Rúmil was sitting upon the stone wall that separated the stables from the archery range, kicking his heels mindlessly against the hard surface. Orophin stood near him, leaning back on the wall, hands clasped behind his head. Both were watching their brother as he took shot after shot at the most distant target and successfully hitting near or on the bull's-eye every time.

"Your skills are improving, my brother," observed Orophin casually.

Haldir lowered his bow and wiped a slight sweat off his brow and grinned. "Thanks!"

"This wouldn't have anything to do with the fair Prince Legolas now, would it?" Rúmil asked wickedly, a mischievous glean in his eyes.

Feeling the heat rising to his cheeks, Haldir hastily turned to hide his embarrassment. Was his attraction to the prince that obvious? Trying to regain some dignity he answered as nonchalantly as he could. "Now why would you think that?"

"Oh come off it, Haldir!" Rúmil exclaimed half irritated, half gleefully. "We're your brothers. Do you not think we know you well enough to know when you have a crush?"

Haldir mumbled something under his breath unintelligible even to Elf ears.

"What was that?" Orophin chimed in. "We didn't quite hear you."

"I asked if you also did not know me well enough to know when I didn't want to talk about it."

"Ah."

"But now that you bring it up…"

"So it's as we suspected." Rúmil stated simply.

At this Haldir looked up at his brother, startled. "For how long?" he asked.

"Oh, since about the first day here," replied Orophin off-handedly.

"Since the first day!" exclaimed Haldir. "Was it truly that obvious? Why didn't you say anything to me?"

"Because, dear brother," Rúmil said, jumping off the wall to drape his arm over Haldir's shoulders, "it's so cute to watch you! It's been a long time since anyone has caught your attention. And yes, it was truly that obvious."

Haldir groaned, mortified. "Do you think Legolas knows?"

"How could he not?" snorted Orophin. "You gawk at him every time he came into a room."

"Oh no," Haldir moaned.

"Don't worry, I'm sure he's used to it."

"Gee, thanks. That makes me feel _so_ much better."

"Listen, little brother," Rúmil started, "Don't worry about it. Legolas has had so much on his plate these past few months. I don't think he's had much time to think about it. And besides, it would do you some good to have a love-interest again."

"Yeah," interjected Orophin, "You've been so moody these past few centuries; now it seems like you're happier than you've been in a long time."

"Happier, maybe," Haldir said, finally resigning himself to opening up to his brothers. "but at the same time, I am more miserable than I've ever been in my life."

"But why?" Rúmil seemed truly baffled.

"Because of what happened while I was under the enchantment of that river," Haldir said, and recounted his dreams to his brothers, deliberately leaving off the hellish end. "Everything was more vivid, more real, than anything this life has ever been. It felt like I truly had lived my entire life with Legolas and that every passion I had for him was returned to me in equal measure. How can I go on, pretending as if nothing has happened between us?"

"Simple. You do it because it really didn't happen," said Orophin plainly.

"But it _felt_ real!" Haldir exploded, frustrated that he could not adequately relay his experience to them.

"Yes, I'm sure it did feel real," offered Rúmil, casting a meaningful glance at Orophin before returning his attention to Haldir. "I do not envy your position, Haldir. If ever you need to talk, know you can come to me."

"As well as me," said Orophin. "You know we'll always be there for you."

"Thanks," said Haldir, gratefully.

"And besides," added Rúmil with a returned twinkle in his eye, "who's to say what you dreamt won't some day come true?"

Orophin, catching on to his brother's mischievous look suddenly clasped his two hands over his heart and started to stumble around as if in a love-sick daze. Mimicking Legolas's voice as best he could he cried, "Oh Haldir! Haldir! How you make my heart sing! There is no other for me but you!"

"Oh shut up," grumbled Haldir half smiling as he pushed his brother away.

Just at that moment Revion came striding onto the field. Spying the three brothers on the far end of the field, he jogged lightly to join them.

"Ah, Revion, my good friend!" exclaimed Haldir grinning, "Just in time! Do save me from these unjust insinuations of my brothers!"

This exclamation, however, only seemed to fuel Rúmil's joviality. "Oh Haldir!" he mimicked, throwing his arm against his forehead and falling against the wall in a fake-swoon. Looking up at Revion he squinted against the sunlight. In a more sober voice he added, "Our brother is in love!"

"Ah!" grinned Revion, good-naturedly, "And who is the lucky _elleth_?"

Alarmed, Haldir was quick to answer before either of his brothers. "No one, Revion. My brothers seem to be under the influences of a little too much of your fine Dorwinion. Do forgive them."

"Nay, _mellon-nin_," chuckled Revion, "I think they speak truly. So who is she?"

Haldir shot a warning look at his two brothers. The last thing he needed now was for them to reveal the truth about his sexuality.

"It would seem your brothers have suddenly been struck dumb," observed Revion smilingly, noticing the silent exchange. "Perhaps a little later on I can glean such information from them when they are not under such heavy threat as they are now."

"Indeed," replied Haldir wryly, "if you are able to do that, then my brothers are no friends of mine."

"Don't worry so much, Haldir," said Orophin. "We'll take our knowledge to the grave. Shan't we, Rúmil?"

"Absolutely," agreed Rúmil. "What with Haldir's ever improving aim, we wouldn't dream of betraying our dear brother!"

Sighing, Haldir shook his head. He did not miss Rúmil's subtle reference to Legolas and only hoped that Revion did not catch his brother's meaning. Deciding it was best to change the subject while he could he redirected his attention to Revion.

"So anyway," he began, "What brings you out here?"

The smile faded from Revion's face as he remembered his reason in tracking down his current companions. "Alas," said Revion seriously, "I wish I had better news. I have come to inform you that Legolas has announced that we are going to war against the dragon."

The color started to drain away from the three Elves' faces. "Wh-what do you mean?" stammered Haldir. "When I left him earlier today, he had informed me that he was going to decline the Dwarves' request. What has changed?"

"Apparently the king awoke long enough to instruct Legolas to do this."

"The king?" Haldir questioned hopefully. "Does this mean he's awake now?"

"Sadly, no. He returned to his slumbers as soon as he spoke with Legolas. But Legolas did speak to the king; right now he is in council with his father's board. The Dwarves, who apparently had already left, have been informed and are making their way back to the palace."

Although stunned by the news, Haldir knew exactly what he was supposed to do. "Tell Legolas that I am ready to fight along side Mirkwood. Together Lothlórien and Mirkwood will make a stand and will return victorious."

Revion smiled. "Legolas said you'd say something like that. He also said to tell you that if that be the case, he would welcome your skill. Find Daugion; as acting head of the army now, he will be the one to whom you need to report."

Haldir nodded, glad he did not need to argue his case to Legolas. Glancing at his brothers he took his leave of them and went in search of Daugion.

After some time, Haldir came across the other Elf in the armory who had apparently just finished taking inventory of the supply of swords, shields, armor, bows and arrows. The tally hung on a hook over the wheel where Daugion was now sitting sharpening his sword. With sparks flying as metal met stone, Haldir stood in the doorway for several minutes before Daugion noticed him. When finally he did, his face lit up in ready gladness.

"Haldir!" Daugion exclaimed, delighted. "What can I do for you?"

"Hello Daugion," said Haldir warmly, "I hear you're the Elf I need to see to enlist."

"Indeed! And where did you hear such a nasty rumor?" asked Daugion teasingly.

"Revion sent me."

"Did he now? Well, I guess I can't accuse our worthy friend of lying, can I." Daugion stood and approached Haldir. Clapping his hand on the other's shoulder he smiled. "You are more than welcome," he said warmly. "In such a battle as this, we can use every hand we can get." He paused, a thoughtful look on his face. "You know, if it weren't from the king's own mouth, I would think Legolas had lost his mind."

"Aye," said Haldir with a slight chuckle in his voice, "I agree with you there."

"You are becoming friends with our prince, aren't you," Daugion observed.

"I certainly hope so," said Haldir, trying not to appear embarrassed. "He seems a decent Elf."

"Yes, he certainly is that," answered Daugion, "but I can't help but feel like he's over his head a bit."

"Hmm…" Haldir was noncommittal. Privately he agreed with Daugion and knew that Legolas himself would agree with Daugion, but over the past few months he had witnessed the tension between the two and decided it was best to keep out of it all together. He liked both Elves; to keep one friend at the cost of another was too high a price.

Deciding that changing the subject was safer than sharing his thoughts, Haldir spoke. "So now that I'm here, what can I do to help?"

""Well," answered Daugion, thinking, "although news apparently travels fast around here to bring you here barely after I learn of this myself, I do believe we need to get the word out. Go and gather the division leaders and have them assemble on the training field as quickly as possible. I need to meet with them before the day's end."

"Of course," Haldir nodded shortly. "Is there any other message?"

"Nay, _mellon-nin_," Daugion answered, "If they haven't heard yet of Legolas's orders, inform them. Otherwise just have them meet me on the field. I will advise them once we are all gathered. We have much work to do ere we leave."

"Indeed," agreed Haldir. Taking his leave, he turned and went out into the afternoon sun to seek out his Elven brethren.

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_The cloaked figure crouched outside in the bushes below the king's window, waiting for the room to empty of its other inhabitants. As soon as the prince and his companion left, he crept over the sill and into the chamber. Glancing towards the door to ensure his privacy he carefully brought forth his canteen and dampened the cloth he carried. Looking down at the king with an unreadable face he wiped the royal brow with the cloth. Quickly wrapping the cloth in a piece of leather, he stowed his canteen and gloves along with his rag and stealthily slipped back out of the window and as quietly as he came he disappeared into the forest._

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Legolas's head ached. It seemed like it had been doing that a lot lately, which was unusual for a member of the Elder race. Nevertheless it seemed as if he was destined to live with the dull pain until such time came when the weight of ruling a kingdom now at war was removed from his shoulders. Until his father returned to health. Who knew when that would be?

For the first time since he could remember, he had been actually listening to his father's advisors for the past several hours. While certainly not the first people he would naturally turn to, they were the best equipped to advise him in this highly unusual situation. As was to be expected, several on the board did not trust Legolas's word that this declaration of war was actually from his father. Others did not believe Legolas capable of commanding such a military strike. Yet one or two both believed him and, remarkably enough, thought him able. All of them, however, treated him with the contempt only the wary can provide. Perhaps he was green in the area of military strategy and might, yes, but he was not unfamiliar with battle and leadership. Still, Legolas figured that it was better to be slightly coddled than to be unsure and unprepared.

Coming up with a plan of attack against a creature so well protected and dangerous was no easy task. Legolas felt as if panic was carefully bottled up inside a delicate shell of self-control within him. It would be so easy to give in to the temptation to pull his hair out, wail, or start throwing objects in his father's office where he currently was sitting, pouring over the board's proposed battle plan.

It would take a fortnight to reach Erebor. Once there they had to scope out the land and look for their best vantage point. But how do you fight something that flies, breathes fire, and has such a keen sense of smell that even a lone spy would be discovered before they even reached the lair? The more he looked at the situation, the more disheartened Legolas felt and the more he felt like this was a futile, useless waste of lives. Surely he had made the right decision in declining the Dwarves; if not for his father's orders, he would not have this burden of predetermined guilt and pressure. Despite the king's command to him, Legolas was tempted to rescind his offer of help and take the blame his father would undoubtedly bestow upon him once he regained consciousness.

But Legolas knew this was all ridiculous folly, this hopeless dreaming. The decree had been sent forth, the decision made. And for as long as he had been claiming it was not his place to rule on this verdict, it was time to live up to this statement now that the stakes had been made. It was time to become a leader, a ruler; a king. A king in the stead of his just father, a king resolute and disciplined, even if that meant acting against his personal wishes.

A discrete knock on the door interrupted Legolas's wandering thoughts. Glad for a reprieve, he stretched the crick in his neck before calling, "Come in!"

"Legolas?" a voice sounded from the entrance way.

"Ah, come in, Daugion," Legolas greeted his visitor with a smile on his lips, "You're just the person I was looking for. How go the preparations?"

Daugion noted the genuine tone Legolas had. Feeling more comfortable with his intrusion now that Legolas seemed able to get past their current difficulties, he entered the office. Declining Legolas's gesture to take a seat with a slight shake of his head, he remained standing, arms clasped behind him.

"That's actually what I came here to talk to you about, Legolas," he began. "Haldir came by to see me and I sent him to gather the division leaders. I am meeting them shortly. As commanding officer I expect you'd want to attend."

"Indeed," said Legolas, trying to fight off the weariness he felt at the thought of yet another meeting regarding strategy and planning. "I spent all afternoon with my father's counselors; they have advised me of several options. I was actually hoping to go over some of them with you before meeting with the troops. Do we have time now?"

"A few minutes, yes."

"Then that will have to do." Handing over the notes and plans taken from his earlier conference, he continued. "Here is what we went over today. Any thoughts?"

Daugion was quiet for a moment as he scanned the pages before him, a look of concentration on his brow. "Hmm," he murmured more to himself than to Legolas. Looking up he saw that Legolas was watching him intently.

"Well?" the prince asked.

"Well," answered Daugion, "I suppose these are as good as any suggestions I might have. I suspect a lot will depend upon the circumstances once we reach Erebor."

"That is my thought as well," sighed Legolas. "I hate going into this situation as we are; I feel like I have blinders on with no way of removing them and I can't see any real plausible possibilities here."

"I suspect, Legolas, that even your father would be feeling some frustration at this, were he in charge right now."

Startled at such a statement from his one-time friend, Legolas looked up. For a fleeting moment he felt like he had his childhood friend back again. Once more they were as Elflings; on the same side, both frantically trying to get out of some trouble they managed to get themselves into, desperate to appear responsible, calm, and in control. Here once more was Daugion, Legolas's best friend… and yet he was still the supporter of his father. Only now, for the first time, Legolas did not mind; in fact, it was nice to have someone who seemed able to bridge the gulf between father and son.

He smiled and Daugion smiled back. "Thanks," he said. "I appreciate that."

Daugion did not reply but rather turned the edges of his mouth up again, letting Legolas know that he still had a friend. A few seconds of reconciling silence lapsed between them.

"Are you ready to go?" asked Daugion, breaking the silence first.

"In a moment," responded Legolas, "You go on ahead. I will be there presently. There are a few things I want to take care of here first."

Daugion inclined his head in acknowledgement. "Very good. I will see you shortly."

As soon as the door closed behind his friend, Legolas smiled contentedly, the ache in his head suddenly much diminished. Whatever else this war was to bring, one good thing to come out of it was an apparent truce between Daugion and himself. However long it lasted, Legolas was glad to receive it.

Gathering up some of his parchments and the plans he and the board had devised, Legolas made ready to leave when yet another knock sounded at his door. Feeling a mixture of surprise and annoyance he called out.

"Yes?"

The door opened cautiously and a raven-haired _elleth _poked her head into the room. "Legolas?" she questioned timidly.

"Raina!" Legolas exclaimed, exchanging his annoyance for delight, "What brings you here to my inner sanctum?"

"I was wondering if Revion might be here with you."

"No, I'm sorry," answered Legolas, "I haven't seen your husband since earlier in the day."

"Oh," she said, casting her eyes downward. "I'm sorry to have disturbed you."

As she began to shut the door Legolas again called out to her. "Raina, wait! Haven't I told you time and time again that you are never disturbing me? Come, I was leaving anyway. Walk with me a while."

Raina smiled and held open the door allowing Legolas to pass. "Thank you, I will!" she answered, seeming immediately more at ease now that the formality of the king's office was behind them.

A brief moment of companionable silence lapsed between the two. Legolas glanced at his soft-spoken and graceful friend. The girl was slightly younger than Legolas himself and so he had known her her entire life. Lately, however, it seemed he had not seen her much, as was the case with most of his friends. To spend a few moments with her now was a serendipitous surprise.

"Where are you going?" asked Raina, breaking into Legolas's thoughts.

"You have heard that we are going to assist the Dwarves?" At Raina's nod he filled her in on his meeting.

"Which means Revion will be with you for a while yet," answered Raina, sounding slightly disappointed.

"I suppose you're right!" exclaimed Legolas only just now noticing this. "Would you like me to take him a message?"

"No, it's okay. It's nothing that can't wait."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. It's only that I want to know how much he knew regarding this whole matter."

"Ah, I see," said Legolas, "Well, I'm sure he will be able to actually tell you more than he could now after this meeting is over. Which should be fairly short. Shall I send him to you once it's over?"

"That would be wonderful," answered Raina gratefully.

"In the meantime, do you have any questions I can answer for you?"

"You're a good friend, Legolas," she smiled. Pausing for a moment she then added, "Do you know how long you will be gone?"

"At least six weeks. Travel alone will take a month."

Raina's face fell. "That long," she said downheartedly.

"I'm sorry, _mellon-nin,_" said Legolas tenderly, stopping to place a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you," she whispered. Gathering herself she looked into Legolas's eyes. Her voice betraying none of her emotions she added, "You better get going. You don't want to be late. Which we both know is a certain propensity of yours."

Legolas grinned at her gentle teasing. "Nay, fair one, not a propensity; a privilege, born of being a prince."

"Call it what you will," Raina smiled back, "You're still going to be late."

"I'll stop by and see you before we leave, I promise."

Raina nodded. "Go," she said.

Legolas looked down at her again sober face. With his one free hand he brought her head to him and lightly kissed her forehead. Then turning, he made his way out onto the field where he found Daugion already in the middle of a speech.

Catching Daugion's eye to let him know he was there, Legolas listened to what was being said with one ear. He knew his second-in-command would be able to brief the division leaders gathered as well as he, so he took the opportunity to look out over the group. There was Revion near the back. Gondien stood near him. Other friends stood out from the crowd as well. Even those he did not count as his closest friends he knew well and he noted the looks of concern and concentration on each one of their faces.

Ah, there was Haldir and his two brothers. They were standing near the front and off to one side. Despite his earlier confidence that Haldir would offer his services, Legolas nonetheless felt irrationally pleased to see him there. He took no note of Legolas but was directing all his attention to what Daugion was saying.

"…and with that," said Daugion with a note of introduction in his voice, "I will now turn things over to Prince Legolas."

Legolas who had been watching Haldir as he heard himself being introduced noticed the other Elf start, look at him, and smile. Smiling to himself, Legolas quickly averted his eyes back to the other Elves gathered.

"I know that all this is difficult to understand," began Legolas. "I also know that you are more than capable of what I am asking you to do. I know that there are many false reports concerning the king circulating right now; please, do not listen to him. Today King Thranduil woke long enough to order me to do this seemingly impossible thing. Many of you have served under me for centuries and yet I can still see the doubt in your eyes. Know this: even if I have not yet earned your trust, I know my father has. Trust in his judgment.

"I will not disappoint him and I know that none of you will either. As you have just learned, there is much to do before we leave. Gather your divisions and make ready. You are all brave and noble Elves and I have the utmost confidence in your abilities."

Here Legolas paused, taking time to look each Elf in the eye. A few managed meager smiles as they met Legolas's eyes. Although the group appeared more reassured than before, Legolas noted that each one still looked unsettled. _As well they should be,_ he thought.

"I am not going to mince words and pretend as if this will be of no real consequence," he continued. "You know I would be lying if I thought we would return unscathed from this battle. Yet I charge you to remember that there are some things worth fighting for: Freedom from tyranny. Unity with our fellow residents of Middle-earth in a time of great uncertainty. And above all, love. Love of all that is good and right in this world. Without love we are nothing."

At this last Haldir squirmed uncomfortably, aware of his brothers' meaningful glances and subtle nudges. While he had not taken his eyes off the prince since he began his speech, Haldir was relieved to see that Legolas seemed not to notice.

A silence full of significance followed the prince's words. Each Elf gathered pondered in his heart the truth of his message and each one of them felt a certain swelling of certainty inside of them. Of course Legolas was right. They were Elves of honor. They would not back down when such a threat loomed over them.

Only one question remained. When would they leave?

Seeming to read their thoughts Legolas added: "We leave one week from today."

To be continued…

_A/N: For those into etymology, Raina means "gracious"._


	7. On the Road

A/N: Before I begin, I'd just like to make a quick comment to anyone who has read the reviews of this story. One reviewer pointed out that Daugion's name may have some connection to orcs. While this is an astute observation and I love the depth of analysis of this comment, the name I chose for Daugion came from an online elvish name dictionary and I had no knowledge of it having anything to do with orcs. Though I do love having names that reflect the character's personality, this was just a mistake. Though Daugion can be a bit of a brute sometimes, he is not in anyway affiliated with the orcs. Blame only the ignorance of his creator in naming him. If I ever rework this story, I'll be sure to correct that oversight. Thank you Aislynn for your remarkable comment pointing of this out:)

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The week passed quickly. Although the army was well trained and familiar with battling orcs and spiders, an entirely different strategy was needed for fighting a dragon; something that the Mirkwood Elves had not done in many a century. This required both stealth and sharper than usual accuracy. Because he was aware of this, any additional time Legolas had available to him while not running the kingdom he spent on the archery field, working to improve the precision of his archers' aim.

Unbeknownst to Legolas, the Elves of his kingdom admired him greatly for this. In him they recognized the same sort of authority and leadership they knew in their king and respected him for it. While Legolas was still struggling with himself over the decision made, his subjects saw only a calm, in control leader who knew what he was doing. Because of this they trusted their prince and although they knew of the coming battle and still had concerns, they felt confident that in the end, Prince Legolas would do everything within his power to return victorious, bringing their husbands and sons home with him.

Now on the eve of departure families were spending time together, feeling the bitterness that comes with knowing this goodbye might be their last. Legolas, knowing full well the repercussions of war, had given his warriors the night off; although he himself kept a prayerful vigil alone with his father, readying himself as best he could mentally for the coming confrontation.

At home with his wife, Revion could not help but feel some anxiety over the coming battle. He loved and trusted Legolas; moreover he _knew _Legolas in a way that most in the kingdom did not. As one of the few who had Legolas's complete confidence in these matters, he knew the prince was still ill at ease with the whole situation. And knowing that put him at odds as well. Though glad Legolas regarded him so highly as a confidant, a small part of him wished he could feel the same sense of security as the rest of the kingdom had.

Raina on the other hand was the picture of perfect tranquility. Looking at her, Revion felt so completely blessed by her presence. He reached out and drew some strength from his wife, gathering her calm to him and wrapping himself in it like a warm blanket on a cool evening.

"You are so amazing," he murmured to her as he brought her into his arms. "How was I so fortunate to end up with you as my wife?"

Raina looked up at him with amusement in her eyes. "Because," she answered, "you had enough common sense to listen to me when I told you to marry me."

"Ah, so I have not only an amazing, gracious, loving, wonderful wife, I have a wise wife as well." He bent to place a kiss on the tip of her nose. "How blessed am I!"

"You're not so bad yourself," Raina replied, "Not only did I marry an _ellon_ who knows how to shower his wife with compliments, but he is also courageous, caring, and the handsomest _ellon _who ever lived."

"The most handsome I'll agree with," said Revion, wagging his eyebrows, "but courageous…" His voice softened as he became more sober. "I'm not so sure of. I do not want to go off to war, _meleth._"

"Nay, my love," Raina answered, wrapping her arms more securely around his waist, "You are not courageous because you go to war; you are courageous because you go to war in spite of your feelings."

"I do not feel courageous."

"If you felt courageous I would fear that you had become arrogant."

"Hmm…" Revion was non-committal.

"Yes?" Raina probed.

"How is it that you are able to be so at ease with this parting?" Revion asked her.

"You've gone away before. You always come back," Raina stated simply.

"True, but this is different. You don't know if I'll return this time."

"You will return," Raina said firmly, "I know you will."

Revion looked deep into his wife's eyes and saw something there in their depths: a certainness of what she was saying so deeply rooted that no fear would find entrance. "You _do_ know, don't you," he said.

"Yes."

Revion shook his head, smiling fondly at his wife. Some of the anxiety that he had been carrying with him for the past week lessened at her comfort. While Raina was not gifted with foresight per se, Revion had learned to trust his wife's intuition long ago. Why then did he still have a lingering feeling that something terrible was going to happen?

Shaking himself mentally for thinking such things, Revion smiled again at his wife, his eyes full of wonder and love. "You are my joy," he said in a low, meaningful voice, "my life, my everything. An eternity is too short a time to spend by your side."

"Oh good," smiled Raina, "because an eternity is what we have, _meleth_, and when you come back, I will remind you again and for every day to come that you said so."

A mischievous look came into Revion's eyes. "Why don't you start reminding me now?" he asked in a suggestive voice.

"Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?" Raina teased back. "Let's see what we can do about that."

Capturing her husband's lips with her own she leaned into him and opened her mind to him. Wave upon wave of good intentions, deep love, and serenity crashed over Revion and he practically reeled from the impact. If this was not heaven, Revion could not imagine a finer place to be. Sweeping his beloved up into his strong arms, he carried her to their bed and spent the night making passionate love to his own.

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The next morning dawned early in the overcast sky, casting a grey pallor over the kingdom. An ethereal light permeated throughout the land, causing it to appear as if the earth itself was radiating cool, bland light. No bird chirped, no tree stirred. It was as if the world surrounding the Elves knew of their immanent departure and was holding its breath in silent tribute to its warriors.

The crowd gathered around the gates of the palace lined the path down which the army was soon to travel. While not a silent crowd, the conversations that were held were short and subdued, consisting primarily of greetings and murmured expressions of comfort to one another. All were there to send their loved ones off, showing their support to them in the only way they knew how.

Legolas watched this gathering from behind the gate and felt a heavy weight bearing down on his soul. He knew his subjects better now as acting king than he ever did as prince; keeping his father's daily routine of meeting and listening to his public allowed him to see his people in a new light. He felt protective of them, a strong burning responsibility to them. Much as a father looking after his children, Legolas looked out upon this crowd and felt love of them create an ache that refused to be soothed. What he wouldn't give to lessen their sorrow! What comfort could he give them, knowing that he could not guarantee their families' safe return?

Suddenly a newfound respect and understanding of his father flooded over Legolas. Although these past few months had taught him much and caused Legolas more than a few times to have moments of great respect for his father, they had never come with such clarity as this moment did. All that Thranduil had been teaching him, all his strictness and rules now made perfect sense; he was preparing his son for this very moment, to put others before himself, to learn what was expected of a leader, and the wherewithal to do it.

Admiration for his father's teaching and remarkable patience for his son now mixed with a great burden of guilt within Legolas. He became keenly aware of how greatly he needed to return victorious from this battle; not to prove himself to his father but rather so that he could come back and tell his father that he was sorry once the king awoke. The hope of reunification with Thranduil and a repairing of their relationship was what now taking over. Legolas turned his mind inward and prayed with all his might that the Valor would grant him this opportunity. If nothing else mattered in this world, Legolas needed to set things right with his father before the Elf faded away.

But now was not the time, even were his father aware of his son's existence. Now the needs of the many far outweighed the selfish desires of Legolas's heart. His people needed him more than ever and Legolas was determined not to let them down. He would fight for these people and die for them if need be.

Signaling to the gatekeeper to open the gates, he rode forth on his horse Dûrion to greet the crowd. A hush began to fall as those closest to the gate noticed his presence and continued down the line until all eyes were on the prince. Looking into the faces of the people, Legolas saw quite a few familiar to him. In their eyes he saw an array of emotions: anxiety, hope, fear, determination, but most surprising to Legolas, trust. Trust in their prince. Humbled and awed by this he spoke.

"Good Elves of Mirkwood, Men, Dwarves, and other visitors: Thank you. Thank you for your support in being here today. As we go forth, we know we have your blessing and love and that knowledge is what will sustain us in the coming weeks ahead. I cannot promise that everything will turn out all right in the end, but I can promise you that today as we are gathered as the Peoples of this Middle-Earth, free and unyielding to the terrors that lay beyond our door, we will not give in to the darker forces that wait for us. Pray for us, keep us in your hearts, and we will return again with our heads held high, knowing we did not turn our backs while our neighbors suffered under such tyranny. May the Valor bless you and keep you until we meet again."

Finishing his speech, Legolas signaled his army to advance. As agreed upon prior to their departure, Haldir rode out with him on the one side while Thrór rode on his other. Together they were a sign of gathered strength, a unification between the different lands of Middle-Earth, and a stronghold against evil.

As soon as the army began to move, a song began within the crowd. Low and sweet it gathered strength as others joined in. It was a song of love and sorrow, strength and support. As each warrior heard it his heart swelled with its melody. Even those unfamiliar with the Elven tongue felt its presence fill them until there was no room left for anything else. The song fortified them, seeming to sew itself into their very garments, protecting them from all harm.

It could have been a sorrowful departure. But instead a great calm was upon and within the people. What might have been tears were now soft smiles; fear was gone and only supportive love remained. The people trusted their prince and his army; the warriors leaned into the support of their wives and children and drew their strength from them.

It was a slow procession and each Elf searched out his or her loved one and met their eyes with unflinching determination. All that had needed saying had been said the night before. The looks exchanged only served to reinforce their mutual love and support. A general sense of well-being was over the scene; it was as if Eru himself was watching favorably over them.

The crowd watched the retreating backs of the army as they disappeared into the forest. Even long after they were out of sight of the palace every soldier felt the lingering presence of well wishes being sent after them. Behind them the crowd dispersed to go back to their homes, each one trying to retain some sense of normalcy in their lives.

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Mile after uneventful mile passed as the Elves continued their march towards the town of Esgaroth where they hoped to recruit the Men of Dale in their fight. After the descent of Smaug, the remainder of the Men who survived the attack had fled to Esgaroth and were now making their livelihoods there. Legolas hoped that their love of Dale would be enough to bolster their spirits and their pride so that they would join in their fight. Much depended on the addition of those Men.

Already there were a few Men in their company, for which Legolas was extremely grateful. Those Men who had fled to Mirkwood after the attack had seen Legolas's invitation to fight as an opportunity to regain what had been taken from them: their homes, families, and other loved ones. Perhaps it was out of revenge that they came; after all, they knew that to slay a dragon was tricky business. Still, better to fight the enemy while they could than to die cowards, always living under Smaug's tyranny.

As they traveled, Legolas found the addition of those same Men to be a welcome one to their company. Between the Elves and the Dwarves still little love was lost; the Men were a natural buffer between the two worlds. They laughed and told stories, smoking with the Dwarves and singing with the Elves. Though they tired more easily than either of the other races and therefore slowed the army's progression down, Legolas could not imagine what this trip would be like without their company.

So too was he glad for Haldir's company. The Galadhrim's presence at his side steadied him; the calm issuing forth from his riding companion left a peace on Legolas's heart that he knew would not exist without Haldir. Despite this, however, Legolas also found himself distracted by Haldir from his role as a leader. Whether it was through amusing stories Haldir told or the songs that he sang, Legolas began to realize that more often than not, his thoughts were turning away from important matters of war to thoughts of Haldir: his smile that seemed to call forth the sun, his bell-like laugh that sounded like music on a still lake, his golden hair catching the light of the moon, his mellow voice that spoke of infinite wisdom and experience.

At night when they broke camp, Legolas often found himself gazing into the fire or up into the stars, thinking about the day Haldir woke up from his enchanted sleep. He was so disoriented when he came about as was expected, but more than that, he seemed lost and embarrassed. Legolas could still see Haldir thrashing in his sleep and hear the Elf's tortured cries for help. Although Haldir had spoken of his dreams, that they were joy-filled and fluid, Legolas also knew that something had happened to change Haldir. He knew that the other Elf was not lying in his telling of the dream; there was too much detail and emotion in his voice for it to be a lie. But he also was not telling the complete truth. When Haldir had awoken there had been tears falling from his eyes and a depth of pain in them that haunted Legolas still.

But what made Legolas pause and think more than that was what he heard Haldir speak. Though much of it was garbled as sleep-talk often is, some came ringing out clear as day. He knew that Haldir had dreamt of him; at the very least he seemed aware of Legolas's presence there because he had called out to him by name. But Haldir did not speak of him at all when he spoke of his dreams. Yet Legolas knew he was a part of them, and he could guess what part he might have played.

Legolas knew that Haldir was attracted to him. Though the other Elf had made painstaking efforts to keep that knowledge hidden, Legolas could feel it coming from Haldir's mind. They were connected on some deeper level; that moment in his father's study had bonded their friendship in such a way that Legolas could hardly remember a time when Haldir was not a part of his life, though in actuality he had been in it only a short while. His friend was in pain and Legolas knew that he was the cause.

He also knew that he could not deny his own attraction to Haldir. Though he had a few in the past to whom he was attracted, Legolas had never quite felt the same strength of emotion as he did to this Elf. He was kind and caring, wise and joyful, knowledgeable and strong; anyone might fall for him and yet Haldir still remained single. And Legolas knew, without a doubt, that he would remain single for some time yet. For Legolas knew the attraction Haldir felt was tantamount to love and that kind of love could not quickly be gotten over.

Such were his thoughts when Haldir strode over to him the evening before they reached Esgaroth. So deep in his reverie was he that he did not notice at first when the other Elf joined him. He was staring into the fire, transfixed by its flickering light and lost in his own thoughts. It was not until Haldir spoke that he realized he had company.

"It is a lovely night," began Haldir, glancing up at the trees above him and the stars that shone through.

"It is that," agreed Legolas, stretching his legs out in front of him.

"It's the kind of night that were we home you might expect magic to happen, for the skies to open forth and rain down the stars, the earth to burst forth in song, and for people to fall in love," said Haldir in a slightly dreamy voice.

"Why Haldir!" exclaimed Legolas, smiling, "You're a poet!"

Haldir grinned sheepishly. "Not usually, _mellon-nin_."

"Ah, but tonight you are. And you are correct. Were we home, it would be a night for great festivities with singing and storytelling and laughter." Legolas paused. "But here, here it is not such a night. Tomorrow we reach Esgaroth where we shall make final arrangements for battle before we head for Erabor. Because of this, my heart is heavy within me tonight."

"Yet not so heavy as to keep you from smiling just a moment ago," Haldir observed.

"Was I?" asked Legolas slightly bemused, "I don't remember."

"Yes, you were. Tell me, what was it that kept your thoughts at that moment?"

Legolas needed no thinking back to remember, but in an attempt to appear as if it was of no concern, he pretended to think. "Let's see," he began with a thoughtful look on his face, "I was thinking about someone I care a great deal for."

Haldir felt a stab through the pit of his stomach. In all this time, he had not considered that Legolas's heart was taken. "She must be remarkable," he said, attempting to keep a tremor out of his voice, "to capture the attention of the prince."

Legolas smiled both inwardly and out. He knew what was going on inside Haldir's mind. Was this the time to set his friend's mind at ease? Or would it just be simpler to stay silent? Legolas did not want to be the one to break Haldir's heart.

"Indeed," said Legolas simply. "But I'm afraid it can never be."

"But why?" asked Haldir baffled.

"You see, I love someone forbidden to me," Legolas began slowly, "Not only as the prince, but also as the son of my father; he would never approve."

"Your main concern should not be whether your father likes her," said Haldir frankly. "It is your heart you should listen to."

"Ah Haldir," sighed Legolas, "Were it that simple. But I'm afraid that even my heart is confused. This is unlike anything I have ever experienced before. For no _elleth_ has captured my attention; only a visitor to my kingdom." Could he be any more plain?

Haldir nodded sagely. "So she is a mortal. You are right in not giving your heart too freely. She will someday die, as all mortals do, and it will leave you brokenhearted. You would fade from grief." Here his voice cracked from the emotion that that thought caused. He could not bear to think of a world without Legolas in it. Unable to continue what he was saying lest his true feelings become known, he turned away.

"Haldir," said Legolas softly, grabbing the other Elf's hands in his own, "Look at me."

Legolas waited until Haldir turned back to him. Looking straight into his eyes, Legolas saw deep grief and pain reflecting out from them. Tears were threatening to spill and Haldir had a hard time swallowing. His breath seemed to stop and fear lurched within his stomach. Whatever Legolas had to say, he did not want to hear it.

"I know your feelings towards me. I've known for a long time." Ignoring Haldir's slight intake of breath he continued gently. "Haldir, I'm honored. Flattered. That such an Elf as you would find me attractive. But Haldir, this can never be."

Mortification flooded over Haldir. It was as he long feared: the prince knew, he _knew!_ And he had known for some time now. Nothing made sense; thoughts came flying at him, too jumbled to make any sense of. The world was spinning around him and he felt like vomiting.

But pride won out; he would not let Legolas see how deeply affected he was. Closing his eyes against the traitorous tears that were still slipping out, he took a deep breath to steady himself. Searching to the inner calm he knew must exist somewhere within him, he found it, like a small glowing candle in the midst of so much darkness. Grabbing hold of it, he felt his inwards relaxing and his throat unclenched, and he opened his eyes to look at Legolas. Only then did he realize that the other Elf was speaking and trying to get his attention, his eyes and voice full of concern.

"I'm okay," said Haldir, surprised at the strength of his own voice.

Legolas sat back, surprised at what he saw in Haldir. If he had not already felt the tide of emotions come over Haldir, if he could not see the traces of tears sparkling on Haldir's face in the firelight, he would never have suspected that Haldir felt any pain. Truly, Haldir was a remarkable Elf!

"Did you hear anything I said, Haldir?" he asked gently.

"You said you knew of my attraction," Haldir stated remarkably calmly, "and that a relationship between us could never exist."

Legolas opened his mouth to object, but Haldir pressed on. "Please," he said, "let me continue." Nodding, Legolas closed his mouth and listened. "I came to Mirkwood, not knowing what I would find. I thought that I would visit and then return home. I never expected to find someone like you here. And I know it must be uncomfortable for you, but I cannot help the way I feel. I think you are the most amazing being I have ever met and I can't help but love you. But I was never going to act on those feelings; you must know that."

"Haldir!" Legolas interjected, "you did not hear all!" He groaned, not wanting to have to repeat himself. "It is not because I love another that this cannot work, or that I don't care about you too. I know you seek only friendship with me. I cannot express the gratitude I feel at knowing I have such a friend in you! But you must listen: I love that you love me. You should not worry about me feeling uncomfortable about this, for," Legolas drew a deep breath and released it. "I love you too."

Haldir, who had been looking at their still joined hands now suddenly looked up at Legolas, afraid to hope but feeling it rise within him anyway. Peering into his love's eyes, he saw the truth radiating out from them. But there was also caution and wariness.

"Legolas?" he breathed, questioning the other.

"Yes, _meleth_," Legolas responded, bringing his hand to cup Haldir's face tenderly. "I do love you. But a relationship between us is impossible."

"But why!" exclaimed Haldir, a little louder than he meant to. Lowering his voice at the glances of the others surrounding them he added, "If we feel the same way, what is to stop us?"

"I am the prince of Mirkwood, for one," began Legolas, "And it is the duty of a prince to marry and produce an heir. That is just something we cannot do, even if we wanted to."

Haldir nodded, but then a look of pleading came to his face. "Legolas," he said, his heart fluttering madly, "I never would have dreamed it possible that you could care for me. This is my heart's desire; you are my joy, Legolas, my reason for being. Without you in my life, my life would have no meaning. I would be an empty shell, searching out eternity for you, never knowing how to live. If we have the chance to be happy, why stop here? Why should we let rules and laws of a country dictate how we feel? Why should those laws be more powerful than the laws of our own hearts?"

Legolas groaned, feeling the need to hit his head in frustration. Haldir was not making this conversation easy; though had he really expected it to go smoothly? It had been put off too long, however, and now was the time to set things straight before either of them felt any more pain.

"Oh Haldir," Legolas sighed, feeling wistful, "I have long dreamt of finding someone who made me complete in every way, who loved me for who I was and not because I looked a certain way or because I was born into royalty. When I look at you, I know your feelings run deeper than that. But I cannot respond to them! I will not! You are forbidden for me; not only is it against the laws of the land, it is against the laws of nature; if my father were to learn that I loved another male, not only would he disown me, disinherit me, but you cannot imagine the lengths to which he would go to straighten me out, to make me 'normal'. He fears this more than anything else: that men should love other men and that women should love other women. It would be the end of life for me if he should learn what I truly am."

"Oh Legolas!" cried Haldir, his heart burning within him, "Surely you exaggerate! Your father is a reasonable, fair Elf! You are his son! Despite any tensions you might have between yourselves, he loves you and wants the best for you. Certainly he could learn to forgive you in time and love you in spite of this!"

"Haldir, you are so naïve!" said Legolas angrily, "You think that love can rule over all, that it can conquer mountains and move the seas. Maybe in the world you live in that may be. But in my kingdom, all is darker than that; the terrors of Mirkwood are not just in the _yrch_ and spiders; the terror lies within my heart; I cannot yield!"

"Cannot, or will not?" asked Haldir, standing to look down upon Legolas, anger flashing in his eyes. "Legolas, you will never amount to anything unless you learn courage in the face of a storm. I will not be with someone who cannot face himself, who does not know how to stand up to his own fears." He paused, trying to regain some control over his anger which now was tempting him to lash out violently against this Elf who caused him so much heartache. "I will continue with you to Erebor and fight by your side. But I cannot forget what you have said tonight. You and I will never be the same again. Things are not okay between us."

"Haldir!" exclaimed Legolas, scrambling to stand and restrain the other Elf from leaving. "You simply must understand! I love you. I cannot help myself. Valor knows I've tried to be everything my father wishes for in a son. But you do not know how it really is! His homophobia is such that no one can withstand it. His wrath would kill me!"

Haldir felt his emotions buckle for a moment. The fear in Legolas's eyes was real, as was the longing for Haldir to understand and forgive. But Haldir was in no mood for doing so; Legolas had knowingly and deliberately raised his hope only to break his heart. "Oh, I think I understand perfectly. For the first time I see you for who you truly are." Haldir paused. "Goodbye, Legolas," he said icily.

"Haldir!" Legolas cried after his retreating shape. "Wait!" But it was too late. Haldir was gone.

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The next morning Haldir found himself seeking out his two brothers. If Orophin and Rúmil noticed the dark mood of their brother, they said nothing of it. Eating in silence, they prepared for the day together. It was not until they had been on the road for a few hours in this dark silence that Rúmil broke the silence.

"Something happened last night," he said, "Won't you at least speak to us, brother?"

Haldir grumbled low in his throat but said nothing, his eyes cast down on the horn of his saddle.

"You had a fight with Legolas!" exclaimed Orophin quietly, his eyes wide with comprehension.

"I don't want to talk about it," answered Haldir.

"Fine," said Rúmil bluntly. They rode on in silence again for some time before Rúmil tried again. "You know, we're your brothers. You can confide in us."

"I'm not ready, yet."

"Okay then," Rúmil answered, "Then just listen to me. Whatever happened between you and Legolas, you must put it behind you. Do not lose your friendship with him; not only is it important to you – we both know it is – but it's important to the unity of the Elves of Mirkwood and Lothlórien."

"I know it is," answered Haldir, "and I won't forget it. But I cannot forgive him right now."

"You told him your feelings for him!" exclaimed Orophin, understanding finally dawning.

Haldir said nothing.

"I do believe you're right, brother," Rúmil responded slowly. "That's it, isn't it?" he asked Haldir. "You told him and he doesn't feel the same way towards you!"

"No," Haldir told them, "that's not it. Well, that's not it exactly. He told me and he also told me he loves me too."

Rúmil and Orophin both let out glad whoops at Haldir's response. "Why, that's great!" Rúmil cried. "Now you don't have to hide any longer!"

Orophin looked closely at Haldir. "Ah, but something else is wrong then," he said, noticing Haldir's scowl.

"I said I don't want to talk about it."

"When you're ready you will," said Rúmil, sobering. "And when you do, know that we are always here for you."

"_Hanna lle_," Haldir answered.

"Just don't go into battle with anger in your heart. Clear the air with Legolas, Haldir. If something were to happen to one of you, the other would never be able to forgive himself."

Haldir remained silent, pondering this new wisdom. His brother was right, of course. But he still wanted to stay angry for a while. The time for reconciliation would have to wait.

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Up at the front of the army, Legolas was also feeling the effects of the previous night's conversation. Perhaps his timing was not the greatest, telling all of this to Haldir so shortly before they were going to go into battle. Haldir did not need this extra baggage right now; only one of them needed to carry it into war. He should not have told him!

Legolas had spent the night tormented. Although he had searched for Haldir after their confrontation, the Galadhrim had managed to slip away without a trace to follow. If only Haldir would let him near, to set things right between the two! But each time he tried, both at breakfast and lunch, Haldir managed to escape him.

There would be time before reaching Erebor. But the time was short; looking ahead he saw the city of Esgaroth rising before him. They had arrived.

To be continued…

A/N: I'm looking for your opinion. According to the stats, readership for this story is steadily declining. I know that there are people still reading this story, but they are few in number and getting fewer. Is this story worth continuing? Drop me a line and let me know what you think. To those still with me, thanks for reading!


	8. War!

A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update. This chapter was a very difficult one to write (at some points it was like pulling teeth!), so thanks for your patience with me. Also, thank you for your encouragement to continue this story. The stats are still low for this story, but for the first time ever the hits for the last chapter stayed the same for the previous one, so I find this very encouraging. I haven't decided if I'll end it early; I'll give it a few more chapters before deciding. But if I do end it early, I have an alternate happy ending in mind for it, so I won't leave you hanging, I promise!

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The Men from Dale had been more than eager to assist Legolas and the Dwarves in their attempt to reclaim Erebor. In them Legolas could see a burning flame, a passion so deep for their city that it fairly took his breath away. It had taken no strong prompting on his part to get them to agree to his proposed solution to the dragon's threat. While he could still read fear in their eyes, Legolas saw an overriding determination at the core of each Man that spoke very favorably for their almost doubled army. For that he was exceedingly grateful; now the plan that he and Thrór had devised did not seem nearly as impossible as before. Difficult, yes, but a glimmer of hope now rested in Legolas's heart.

They were ready. Or at least, as ready as they possibly could be in preparing to take on a fire-drake that had destroyed an entire Dwarvish kingdom and the city of Esgaroth in one smooth transaction. Their weapons were sharpened and the plan of attack was clear in each soldier's mind. The camp had been settled at the base of the mountain and now came the exasperating time of waiting. The Men were restless, the Dwarves ready to storm the mountain, and the Elves contemplative.

Legolas was no exception. While the morrow's battle was keeping his mind plenty occupied, he still could not escape the thoughts of Haldir and their last conversation alone together nearly a week ago. It would seem that Haldir had absolutely no intentions of allowing him to explain himself and was avoiding him almost entirely. There were, of course, the strained moments when they found themselves together over a meal or meeting, but always others were around and always Haldir managed to avoid his eye and find some way to slip away as quickly as possible.

He could not continue on this way into battle, leaving things so unsettled between Haldir and himself! Perhaps he was unfair in sharing his feelings so abruptly, especially since he had only recently been able to admit those feelings to himself. And it was even more unfair to Haldir to admit he had those feelings and then to proceed to tell him that there was no way they could be together. But at the time, Legolas had his defenses down and the longing to express himself to his love before facing possible death seemed more important than the possibility of one or both of them dying in the coming confrontation without Haldir ever knowing the truth.

In retrospect he knew how cruel he had been. Haldir had every right to be angry with him! But to ignore him so thoroughly when the immediate future was so uncertain was also a bit unfair of Haldir as well. If nothing else happened tonight, Legolas knew that he had to find Haldir and set things right between them before daybreak which was fast approaching.

Steeling himself against what was sure to be a difficult conversation, Legolas determinedly went in search of Haldir. Tonight Haldir would not elude him; it was high time that this strain between them ended. Legolas missed his company, his companionship, his friendship, his understanding; he even missed those funny little moments that Haldir would show his true emotions and just as quickly covered them up. Legolas was quite sure that Haldir thought himself fairly good hiding his feelings, but being so in tune with such strong lovesickness himself, Legolas read Haldir's feelings like a book.

If only he were not so fettered by the weight of responsibility to his kingdom! If only his father was not so homophobic and could accept Legolas as who he truly was! Perhaps if these things were true, Legolas would feel free to be courted by Haldir, unabashed at their mutual love. But the "if-onlys" were strong indeed. Dreams were good for spending lazy afternoons with, but reality was too often like a dash of icy water in the face.

He found Haldir sitting by a fire with his two brothers. Upon recognizing the approaching figure, Orophin and Rúmil made a hasty retreat, leaving a distressed looking Haldir alone with Legolas.

Sitting down opposite the fire from Haldir, Legolas cleared his throat but found himself unable to speak. Silence stretched on between them until finally Haldir spoke.

"What do you want, Legolas?" he asked wearily, sounding tired and dejected all at the same time.

Legolas cleared his throat again. "What do I want?" he croaked back. "I would think that would be obvious."

"I don't want to fight anymore," said Haldir.

"I don't either. I want to talk with you. I want to set things right between us. I want us to be friends again." Legolas felt like he was babbling.

"I don't think that's possible anymore," Haldir answered softly, calmly.

Legolas remained quiet for a moment, unsure of how to respond to that. "Please don't give up on me, on us," he said finally.

Haldir sighed and threw a stick into the fire, watching the sparks fly up as it hit the flames. "There is no 'us'," he answered. "You've made that abundantly clear."

Legolas threw back his head and groaned deep within his throat. Looking back at Haldir through the flames, he tried to read the other Elf's face but found himself unable to do so. Either Haldir had learned to mask his emotions in the past week, or else he was feeling nothing inside. Without knowing what Haldir was feeling, Legolas did not know what else to say. The silence fell between them once again and the awkwardness of the moment surrounded Legolas. He searched his mind for all the things he had been wanting to say to Haldir during the past week, but all the rehearsed conversations in his mind were gone.

Finally Haldir spoke again. "Do you have something else to say?"

"Yes," Legolas answered. "Please, let us be friends again." Did he really just say that stupidly simple statement and did his voice just crack?

For the first time since Legolas sat down, Haldir looked into his eyes. Still his emotions were veiled; Legolas had no idea what he was thinking. "Friends?" Haldir asked, a flash of angry passion in his eyes punctuated the word. "Do you honestly think that it's that simple? That you show up on the last night and sit down and say 'oh Haldir, ignore everything I said to you the other night. Let's be friends again' and everything would be all right? You know, for someone who's been around for so long, you have a lot to learn about how people's emotions work. You can't just turn them on and off again with a snap of the fingers. You think that the eve of a battle will lower my defenses and I'll forgive you just like that without even hearing a word of apology."

Legolas sat back, stunned by the sudden passion in Haldir's voice. He had been trying to get him to talk all week and all he had been able to get out of him was perhaps a dispassionate sentence at a time. He should have known that this was coming; he deserved every true word of it.

Standing, Legolas came around to the other side of the fire, knelt, and took Haldir's shoulders in his hands and looked deeply into those infinitely beautiful grey eyes; eyes that had captivated him since the very beginning, eyes that had spoke their love long before Haldir would admit his feelings. Those eyes that had been so dull in the past week now spoke volumes and the pain he found there cut him like a knife. Legolas felt his love's pain run through him in physical manifestations. Ignoring it and the queasiness in his stomach that had been with him all week, he spoke.

"I _never _intended to hurt you, Haldir. You must believe me. I am _so_ sorry to have caused you any pain. You will never know how sorry I am." Legolas paused, allowing Haldir the chance to speak but the other Elf only gazed back at him, waiting. He continued. "I only intended to ease the pain I saw in you that night. I wanted to relieve your heartache, a heartache I caused by allowing you to think another held my affections. I didn't mean to cause you further pain by confessing my own feelings for you. I should never have done so. I am sorry."

"That's just it, Legolas," Haldir exploded, brushing off the hands that held him. "You think that even with an apology – an apology I had to drag from you and therefore can't trust – will fix everything. You apologize for telling your feelings for me and yet that is not the thing you truly should be sorry for. I cannot keep having you break my heart, Legolas. Please, don't ask me to. Sorry just isn't good enough."

"Haldir, please, wait!" Legolas cried as he watched him stand up. Standing up himself he followed after the quickly retreating figure of the angry Elf. This time Haldir would not run away from their conversation. "I'm doing this all wrong. What can I do to set things right again? What can I say that will make you understand? I am not sorry for loving you; I am sorry for telling you my feelings because now things cannot be the same between us and I cannot possibly change things so that everything will be acceptable. I cannot change heaven and earth. Valar knows I wish I knew the right thing to do here. It seems like lately all I have been able to do is cause pain and disappointment and I just don't know what else to do to set things right. I am only an Elf, Haldir, an Elf in love with the wrong person. I cannot help what I feel. I cannot change who I am or what I feel. But this is how things are: I am the prince and future king of Mirkwood. That alone forbids a marriage to another male. And I am the son of an Elf who has the capacity of some of the greatest good and yet the greatest tyranny in the entire kingdom. Do you know that not only is homosexual marriage forbidden in my land, but because my father fears homosexuality so much that any relations of that kind in _any_ manifestations can lead to prison, banishment, torture, or even death? If he cannot "fix" the problem in an individual, he will eliminate that problem. Can you not see? I am powerless against his fear; I have hidden who I am for my entire lifetime because he will _never_ accept who I am. What am I supposed to do, Haldir? What? Is a forbidden love worth sacrificing my life… _your_ life? I can_not_ risk him finding out. A world without you in it would be a world not worth living in. And believe me, for your loving me and for me loving you, you, even as a guest and friend of our kingdom, you would not be spared his wrath. Indeed, because you love his son, perhaps his anger would be even greater. I don't know what else to do, what else to tell you. What can I do, Haldir? Tell me what I can do to fix this and I will do it, even if it takes until the end of time."

Haldir stopped his march through the forest to turn and look at Legolas. They had ended up in a secluded glen where a rippling waterfall twinkled in the moonlight. Neither Elf noticed the beauty surrounding them; Legolas was too full of anguish and Haldir was too confused by his conflicting emotions to be able to sort through them. He had no idea Thranduil had such a dark side to him. Suddenly he felt able to understand Legolas's fear; his fear was not only for himself, but for Haldir. Legolas's love was so great that he would deny both of their happiness to keep him in the world.

Despite this, the only truly lucid thought he could grasp at overrode even this. "A life lived in fear," Haldir finally answered coolly, "is a life half-lived.1 I would gladly face all the wrath in all of Arda if it meant I could be with the one who I love and who loves me. Please, Legolas, just let me be. Whatever we might have had is over at your own hand. I do not know how to remain friends with you; this would always be between us." He paused. "Good night, Legolas. May the Valar shine upon you tomorrow and be gracious to us in our cause."

Legolas stood dumbfounded as he watched Haldir start to walk away again. How was it possible that even with his confession of his father's true nature that Haldir could still be angry? He could not part ways with things still so unresolved between them. Running to catch up with Haldir he called out to him. "Haldir! You have to stop running away from this! We are not finished yet!"

Haldir stopped abruptly, tension causing him to go rigid. Legolas fairly ran into him before he noticed that Haldir had stopped. "Haldir…"

"Shh!" Haldir hissed, cutting him off. "Get down!"

"What's this all about?" Legolas asked, confused at the sudden change in Haldir. "What…" His voice trailed off as he saw what had caused Haldir's caution. There in front of him were two Orcs, their argument loud enough that Legolas was surprised his Elf ears did not hear them before. Crouching down next to Haldir, he covered Haldir's hand with his own and listened intently to the retreating voices.

"Ah, we ain't come all this way to find we's gots ta fight 'em Elves and folks. I says we just go now and get whats we come for," a high pitched whine was heard saying.

A lower, gruffer voice responded. "You heard 'im; we're's suppost'sta just scout out their encampment then report back ta 'im whats we sees. 'e ain't said nothing 'bout no fightin' no army."

"Maybe not ta ya," the first voice responded, "but I hears we's gunna attacks the camp, gets 'em out of da way so's we's don' got no troubles up dere on da mountain."

"You idiot! Why would we want less distraction tomorrow? 'e just wants ta know what we're dealin' wif so's we's can gets what we came for. With dat dragon busy with dat army, he ain't gunna have time to watch us."

"Come on," whispered Legolas to Haldir, "We better get back to camp and warn them."

Haldir nodded and followed Legolas without a word. This new and unexpected development meant trouble. Either the _Yrch_ were going to ambush camp tonight or else they were dealing with a lot more than just a dragon in the morning. He wondered what Legolas was thinking; knowing him he already had a plan in the making.

But if Legolas did have a plan, it turned out to be a futile one. Before they even reached the camp, Haldir and Legolas could hear the sounds of fighting. Apparently the two scouts they overheard were a little behind the times; a full-out battle had erupted since they had left.

Legolas gave a furtive look to Haldir who acknowledged the message with a grim nod of the head. Haldir drew his sword and Legolas his double swords and together they leapt into the thronging masses which soon separated them.

The moonlight gleamed harsh upon the metal helmets of the orcs, illuminating the scene for anyone who might have witnessed it. The encampment was bordered by trees to the west and rocks and cliffs to the north. From these cliffs they were being attacked; wave upon wave of orcs seemed to flow over their sides, jumping from tall distances onto the unsuspecting Men, Elves, and Dwarves who had been sleeping there. Being well trained, however, the army was caught by only momentary surprise before they returned arrow for arrow, stroke for stroke.

Legolas could not see any of his commanding officers, nor any of his closest friends. Not stopping to wonder where they might be in this unscheduled attack, he sprang upon the closest orc and slashed a wide cut into its filthy neck. Turning around he was ready for the next assault and the next after that.

He lost track of the time as hours passed in such a fashion. The air rang heavy with the shouts of battle. Arrows that had been raining down at the beginning of battle from the Elves in the trees and the orcs on the cliffs had been spent. Now rocks were being thrown in their stead, knocking out and killing as many orcs as they were Men, Dwarves, or Elves, so entangled were they one with another.

Archers who had been hiding in the trees had jumped down from their hiding places and fallen in with swords, swinging and hacking as they went. The Elves, by far the most accustomed to such battles as they were in Mirkwood, faired the best out of their army. Here was fighting they could manage; here was the familiar cry of orc as they defeated their enemy one by one.

Dwarves, too, with axes in hand were managing fairly well. Darkness was their element; their eyes adjusting to the surroundings and familiarity of hewing for long hours in the dark mines of the earth. Being so few in number, having only recruited a few of their northern relatives, and shorter in stature than the orcs were expecting, they were able to move through the crowds, catching their prey off-guard, and smiting their ruin with smooth precision.

Men, strong of heart and of hand, were faring the worst. Esgaroth was a fairly peaceable city: a place of trading and merchandise where people of all races could come together and set their differences aside. Still, their hearts were noble and their hands strong. They lacked the agility of the Elves and the night vision of the Dwarves, but still they were not an idle people and their strength showed in their practiced skill.

Swords were notched, armor dented and dirtied and the peoples began to weary as the assault on them continued. They were equally matched in number against their enemy, but none possessed the thick skin of the orcs, nor their tireless ability to sustain such laboring toil as battle demanded of them. But slowly and surely their enemy was pushed back and with the dawning of the sun the army of the free people of Middle-earth could see that their victory was inevitable.

Legolas came across Revion as the battle began to wane. Fighting back to back, the two friends managed to bring down a dozen orcs in a matter of minutes. For a brief moment there was a pause to their labors and they grinned at each other in satisfaction. They were alive, the battle theirs, and morning was coming – a natural ally against the dark forces of their shadowy enemy.

"How do you fare, Legolas?" shouted Revion above the roar.

"Tired, _mellon-nin_," Legolas grinned back, "but glad to see you are still well."

"Aye," Revion answered, "I had not seen you since before the ambush began; I was concerned for you. I am glad to see that you are all right."

Their reunion was cut short, however, by a sight that drove terror into their hearts. It was the dragon Smaug, flying above their heads and casting his large shadow upon the battle field. Legolas muttered an oath under his breath and shouted for his friend.

"Revion!" he called, "Have you seen Thrór recently?"

"Yes! He was over that way, not twenty minutes ago."

"Thank you, _mellon-nin_!" Legolas yelled back as he made his way over towards the direction Revion had pointed. Searching the crowds with his keen eyes, he saw Thrór near the cliffs, valiantly holding off two orcs at the same time. Falling in, he swiftly killed one of the orcs while Thrór finished off the other.

"I thank you," the Dwarf said, wiping his sleeve against his perspiring forehead.

"You're welcome," answered Legolas, before indicating that he should look to the skies. "Have you seen our most recent problem?"

Thrór swore. "We must have drawn his attention, having this battle at the base of his mountain."

Legolas nodded. "I think this may be as good a time as any for our plan to go into action."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Go, now, up the mountain with your chosen contingent. You must stay as hidden as possible as you ascend. We will draw Smaug's attention down here so as to give you time to get to his lair."

Thrór nodded, understanding the new modifications Legolas was improvising. Without further word, he ran off to find the others that were to go with him, leaving Legolas to fend off the still attacking orcs.

Legolas allowed his attention to be drawn into the battle at hand. After he dispatched another two orcs, he gave himself the opportunity to slip away from the battle and into the woods to his back. Quickly he skirted the edge of what was once their encampment to seek out the packs he and the other leaders had stashed in the woods that were full of supplies. Not expecting to find anything left, he was unsurprised to find the spare arrows were gone and the packs empty of all but some meager rations.

How were they supposed to defend against the drake now? Their swords and armor were wearing the signs of the night battle and bows were lying broken under the trees. His own bow he had lost; he had not been wearing it when he had left the camp. Likely it had been destroyed along with the rest of the camp during the night. That did not matter, however, as their arrows were spent. They could certainly collect the fallen arrows from the field and retrieve those that had found their marks, but certainly it would not be enough. They had too few bows left to shoot their too few arrows.

Even with a full armament, Legolas had known they would be little use against a dragon. His hide would be too thick to penetrate, his ability to fly and swoop over the land and breathe fire down upon them a weapon against which they had no defense. And they were tired.

Legolas refused to linger too long on these thoughts, though. The situation at hand needed firm leadership and swift judgment. And a new plan. The Dwarves would make their way up into the lair by the secret door they knew and would lie in wait for Smaug's return. Here below his army would have to push the orcs eastward towards Erebor and leave them out in the open with no place to hide. Archers would have to make do with what they had left; they were to aim for the dragon's eyes. If they could blind him, their chance at victory would increase. Yet their target was still small and distant… and ever moving. Even he, with his superior archery skills, would be unlikely to succeed.

There was still, hope, however, and Legolas had every confidence in his army, tired though they were. These were no weaklings and their hearts were true.

Running back into the throws of battle, Legolas found Daugion.

"Make haste," Legolas told him, "and reform the lines. We need our archers to collect as many arrows as possible. They need to make every shot count. Have them focus all their attention on Smaug; let the swordsmen fend against the orcs."

Daugion acknowledged his new orders with a nod and lost no time in calling out to the soldiers to reform the lines. Legolas left him and went in search of a bow to use, collecting the arrows as he came across them.

Meanwhile Smaug kept circling high above, his curiosity growing over the events below him. He recognized the peoples involved and wondered at how this battle came to be in such a remote part of the land. For the moment, he was content to observe the happenings. Orcs he saw were losing the battle, much to his own satisfaction. He had no love of the creatures who were continually attempting raids of his lair, but then again, neither did he have love for the others. The Dwarves especially he knew would try to reclaim their land; he recognized them as the same ones he drove from Erebor. He noticed their advancement up the mountainside, but he paid them no heed. There was no place for them to go once inside the lair; he had already closed many of the entrances to the place and he would not allow them to escape with any of his treasure.

It was not until he noticed the arrows being shot at him that he became involved. These fool creatures! Did they not know that he, Smaug, would be able to defeat them with no trouble at all? He had not been attacking them; why now did they make their pitiful attempts to shoot him down?

Enraged at what he now saw was trickery by the beings below him, he turned his full attention back to the Dwarves who were nearing the top of his mountain. Swooping back towards the mountain, he charged at the small group, scattering them across the mountainside. He watched as they scampered away, trying to find cover in the rocks that were along the path. Were he not so incensed, he ordinarily might find the sight amusing. As it were, however, he could only see red.

"How _dare_ you try to come into land and try to steal my gold?" Smaug roared, fire escaping his throat. He landed on the path between the Dwarves and the opening into the mountain.

No one dared to speak. "Well?" Smaug demanded impatiently.

"If you please, your most excellent dragoness," began Thrór, knowing that all dragons were fond of compliments, "We were merely wanting to gaze upon your greatness. You, who drove us forth from our land, are so superior to any other creature we have yet encountered. We were too afraid to look upon you before, but in the time that has passed since then, oh most magnanimous one, we have been eaten up inside trying to remember your greatness. We only came to settle our arguments on the matter and to set the record straight on your magnificence."

Smaug felt his anger receding at the high praises the Dwarf in front of him was lavishing upon him. He did not know all the meanings to the words he used, but he was confident that the Dwarf was sufficiently impressed by his being. "Really?" Smaug asked, puffing out his chest with pride. "And what is your conclusion? Were your memories of me accurate?"

"Not in the slightest," Thrór answered, knowing how to play this game. "Mere memory cannot capture the glorious redness of your scales, the flaming heat of your nostrils, your most cunning eyes. Indeed, seeing your radiance now before me, I scarce can believe my own eyes."

Smaug sat back on his haunches, satisfied. "Yes, I am rather striking, aren't I," he said somewhat smugly.

"Oh yes!" exclaimed Thrór, eager to continue in pacifying the terrifying creature before him. "Why, you are most remarkable, most –"

"TRAITORS!" Smaug interrupted the Dwarf with a roar. For now he could see that the other Dwarves were using this time to regroup and sneak past him; the flattery was just a ruse. Flapping his wings and raising into the air, he rained down fire upon them. He picked up one Dwarf in his claw and dropped him over the edge of the mountain. Flying over the others, he chased them down the side of the mountain and back into the still raging battle below.

Seeing the Dwarves running towards them, orcs looked up and saw the reason for their charge. Terror filled their beings and as quickly as they fell upon their enemies, they now retreated into the surrounding landscape, scattering as they went.

Thrór ran ahead of the rest of his kin, motioning towards Legolas. "Go! Go!" he cried.

Legolas needed no encouragement. Picking up the Dwarf king's cry, he had his army retreat back into the relative safety of the woods.

Smaug chased them back, setting the grass and fallen bodies on fire. Fury beat in his heart. He would not allow these beings anywhere near his land again. "Be GONE!" he raged. "Do not come this way again or I _will_ destroy you!"

"Oh great Smaug!" Legolas cried out, "We will not approach your mountain again! Only let us bury our dead, most gregarious, worthy advisary, for our quarrel with the orcs has left many fallen. We beseech you in your gallantry to allow us this one mercy ere we turn back."

Once again the compliments softened Smaug. "Very well. You have one day to bury your dead. Do not pass this way again."

As the dragon flapped off, Legolas took a moment to collect a breath to slow the hammering of his heart. They barely escaped with their lives and still many had fallen in the unexpected confrontation with the orcs. They were defeated and they all knew it.

Slowly Legolas realized that every eye in the army was on him. These were the moments he did not know how to deal with. How could he be a king, a commander, in the face of such destruction when all he wanted to do was mourn for the loss of his comrades?

Clearing his throat, he spoke hoarsely. "We must gather the wounded and dead. Let us not forget their sacrifices. Gather what little you can for the journey home and let us reconvene again before evening so that we may put some distance between us and Erebor before nightfall."

Silently the army dispersed, many looking for fallen friends in between the corpses of their enemies. There were solemn greetings as friends found one another still alive, and mournful singing filled the air from the Elves.

Legolas looked out and surveyed the scene before him. The sun had fully risen by this time and shone down upon the field wet with blood, reflecting its rays against the slick ground. Flames still licked at many of the dead; fires were smoldering and the stink of blood and burnt flesh was heavy in the air.

A heaviness was full upon Legolas and the weight of loss threatened to overcome him, but he stood strong against the flood of emotions. So many had fallen, so many had given their lives and for what? They did not even get to the base of the mountain; their plan failed before it even had time to develop.

But above all, his heart was burdened with a great fear. He had not seen Haldir since the night before. While he had found most of his friends and even Haldir's brothers at some point or another during the night and in the gathering just now in the trees, not once had he caught a glimpse of the Elf who held his heart.

Bearing a hope that was ever waning, Legolas fought back the frantic energy that was demanding he run through the battlefield in search of Haldir. Worry and despair were held in check, but as he stepped out onto the field, his heart grew heavy within him. What had happened to Haldir? Was he still alive?

Praying with every fiber of his being, Legolas searched the fallen for his friend. Relief mixed with increasing anxiety as each body he found was not that of Haldir's. Not finding his body meant that he could still be alive, but as the day wore on, still no sign of the Elf could be found.

He had asked those friends he trusted and who knew Haldir if they had seen him. No one had. Revion had offered his assistance in finding Haldir, but even with the two of them and Haldir's two brothers devoting all their energy to finding their kin, still Haldir could not be found.

By the time the bodies were buried and the army had regrouped, Legolas was about ready to give into the despair. Haldir had not been found. Had he been killed and already buried? If so, he would never know how great his love for him truly was. Legolas would give anything to go back in time, to spend a few more moments with Haldir, to assure him of his love, and go into this battle being completely forgiven and loved by his beloved. But that was not to be. He could not alter time or the events that had happened. How could he go on living without Haldir in the world? He felt the guilt of Haldir's death fall squarely on his own shoulders. If only…

The afternoon meal was a quiet and scant meal at best. No one had the heart to eat what little provisions they had left and they packed quickly for the return trip home. They would travel to Esgaroth with the Men who now called that place home and replenish their supplies before heading back to Mirkwood.

Legolas sat apart from the army, watching the smoldering ruins of the battlefield before him. He knew he did not have the luxury of remaining there by himself for long; he of all people needed to be preparing to leave. But he did not have the heart. Haldir was gone, and Legolas would never know what had happened to him. Did he die quickly? Or was his death long and painful? Did he go, knowing that Legolas loved him? Had he forgiven?

He could not let the tears fall. He felt raw inside, beaten, and too numb to go on. But go on he must; he was, after all, the acting king, and he had obligations to others besides the memory of Haldir.

Standing, he gave one last look out to the field. Suddenly he felt his heart stop. A figure was emerging from behind the smoke; a figure he knew as well as his own. Hope sprang forth within him; was this possible?

"Haldir!" Legolas breathed, unable to step forward, his heart full of the exploding hope and joy at seeing the Elf before him.

Yes! It was Haldir! And he was running towards him, a smile on his lips.

"Haldir!" Legolas cried gladly, allowing the tears to run down his cheeks. "I thought I lost you."

"Shh, _meleth-nin_," Haldir cooed as he reached Legolas, "I am here."

Legolas looked deep into those bewitching eyes. "Never again," he swore to himself, "Never again." Cupping the precious face before him, he lowered his mouth and kissed Haldir. Haldir returned the kiss, throwing his arms around his love.

It was the sweetest kiss he could ever imagine. Better than any fantasy, the reality far exceeded his wildest dreams. But the kiss was broken before he could have his fill.

Haldir stepped back, pain in his eyes. "I'm so sorry," he said. "I won't let it happen again."

Legolas looked up at the slightly taller Elf. "No, _meleth-nin_," he said, "It is I that am sorry. I know now that I cannot face this world without you, no matter what the consequences are. Please, say you'll forgive me."

An almost coquettish smile played on Haldir's lips. "Of course I forgive you, Legolas. You have my heart."

A great smile broke over Legolas's face and lit up his eyes. "You mean it?" he asked, amazed and hopeful.

Haldir smiled, then grabbed the head of the Elf in front of him, bringing his lips to his own, searing his love into that kiss. "I love you, Legolas Thranduilion."

"And I you, Haldir of Lothlórien," Legolas smiled tenderly and lowered his head to capture another kiss from his beloved.

To be continued…

1 While I adore this line, I must give credit where it's due. I took this directly from the movie "Strictly Ballroom" and it (sadly) does not belong to me in the slightest.


	9. What Happened Next

Later that night when they broke camp, fires were lit, food was cooked, and singing commenced. Some songs were solemn and full of remembrance of their fallen comrades, while others were more upbeat and celebratory. While they did not accomplish what they set out to do, they were alive, their casualties were few, and best of all, they were returning home. Still, their hearts remembered those who gave their lives in the battle, and stories were being told of their friends no longer with them. It was, all in all, a night of respectful commemoration, a tribute to those who fell not just now, but all who had fallen in years past, fighting for the good of Middle-earth.

Legolas and Haldir, having spent time earlier in the evening with their friends in remembering those who had fallen, now sat apart from the group, talking in low voices. A copse hid them from view from the rest of the camp, though they could still hear the singing wafting towards them.

"Do you know what one thing I love so much about you is?" asked Legolas, nuzzling Haldir's neck with his head.

"What's that?"

"Your ability to forgive."

"A battle always puts things into perspective, I guess," answered Haldir, thoughtful.

"Indeed it does," Legolas agreed solemnly. "When I thought you were gone, it felt as if the wind had fallen out of the trees, like my soul was collapsing in on itself. And I didn't think I could forgive myself if you had died, thinking that I was unwilling or unable to love you the way you deserve, with my whole heart and body. Because I do love you, Haldir. Maybe we haven't known each other that long, but our souls have touched. We have all the time in the world to get to know each other."

Haldir remained silent, soaking all this in. He was like a sponge starving for moisture and Legolas's words were the long awaited water, slowly filling the void in his soul that he had never known existed until his meeting with the enchanted water. Ever since then, being in Legolas's presence was a beautiful torment. No longer would this be the case. He had Legolas's love, and Haldir did not need to hold back any longer.

"I will eventually need to go back to Lothlórien, you know," Haldir finally answered, thinking of Legolas's last words.

"Then I'll come with you," murmured Legolas, running his hand up Haldir's arm. "I have always longed to see that land, to commune with the mallorn trees, and to meet the Lady of the Wood. Once my father is recuperated and returns to his rightful throne, I shall leave with you. Your home will become my home, your people my people."

"You would give up your life in Mirkwood just for me?" Haldir asked, wonder in his voice.

"Yes." The statement was firm and resolute.

"What about your father?" Haldir finally asked the question that had been on his mind all day. After all that Legolas had told him the night before, he was unsure of whether or not he wanted to know the answer.

Legolas sighed and leaned back, gazing up at the stars above him. Ah yes, his father. He knew that Haldir would eventually ask that question and he deserved an answer. But it was a question even he did not have an answer to. Going with Haldir meant turning his back on his father and his kingdom. Moreover, Legolas knew that eventually Thranduil would find out about their relationship. What would happen then? He did not want to think about it.

"I don't know, Haldir," Legolas confessed. "In regards to coming to Lothlόrien with you, well, my father is a reasonable Elf. He does not deny me the right to travel beyond our lands, and I think that he would agree that it is high time we visited your land as you have visited ours, and that now, with the shadow forming in Dol Guldor and the changing events of Middle-earth, is the time to do so."

"Hmm…" Haldir answered. "That's not exactly what I meant."

"I know, _meleth_, I know."

"What are we going to do?"

"He won't give his consent for us to marry."

Haldir suppressed a slight shudder. "No, you've made that perfectly clear. I – wait. Did you just say _marry_?" A look of joyful wonderment fell over Haldir's face. "You mean, after all that you said yesterday about not being able to have a relationship with me, you're ready to talk about getting married?"

Legolas sat up and gripped Haldir firmly by the shoulders. Looking deep within his eyes he searched them earnestly. "I have glimpsed what my life would be without you in it. I _never _want to live that life. Whatever challenges arise, I want you by my side. We can weather any storm together. So yes. I want to marry you, Haldir of Lothlόrien. Our souls have met and as trees cannot live without water or the sunshine, so also I cannot live without you."

Haldir did not take time to consider that these words might be a dream. Instead, he threw his arms around Legolas, a smile of joy on his face. "And I want to marry you, Legolas Thranduilion. It is my heart's desire." These last words, however, were muffled as Haldir captured Legolas's mouth with his own.

Fire seared through Haldir's body at the contact. All the passion he thought he had felt for this Elf before was now a distant memory, a pale shade of what love could truly bring to his life. Heat broke upon him as waves on a rocky shore, the intensity was like all the volcanic fire of Mordor. The kiss left him reeling, his senses spinning.

"Okay then," Legolas said breathlessly when the kiss was broken, not knowing what else to say.

Haldir grinned sheepishly. "Does this mean we're engaged, then?"

Legolas nodded, a lump in his throat. He himself was still recovering from the kiss that sent him into that strange land of exploding stars and soaring emotions.

"I have to say, I was thinking of something a bit more romantic, if the time ever came," Haldir answered wryly, a slight smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

At this, Legolas threw back his head and laughed. "You're right," he said, wiping tears away from his eyes. "That was a bit anticlimactic."

"Hmm. It was." Haldir studied Legolas intently. "Here. Let's try again."

Adjusting his position, Haldir got to his knees and grasped Legolas's hands in his own. Gazing into his beloved's eyes he spoke. "Legolas Thranduil, I have loved you since first laying eyes on you. By my soul, I never thought that you could return those feelings for me. You would make the happiest Elf in all of Arda if you would be my husband. Will you marry me?"

Legolas gazed back at Haldir. "No," he answered, holding back the laugh at Haldir's confused, fallen face. "I'm already betrothed to the perfect Elf."

Haldir chuckled, as he lifted Legolas's hands to his lips. Pressing a kiss into each of his palms, he looked back up at his betrothed's face. "Ah well, _meleth-nin_, you can't say I didn't try."

"I love that you tried," Legolas smiled back at him.

"What else do you love?" asked Haldir, slightly playfully.

"I love the way moonlight shimmers on the ground through the trees. I love the feel of a cool wind on a hot day. I love the way your face twitches when you're trying to hide your feelings. I love the depth and breadth of your feelings for me."

"Is that all?" Haldir asked.

Legolas chuckled at Haldir's frustration in not hearing what he wanted in that list. "No, that's not all. I love the way your name feels in my mouth. I love to listen to the sound of your laughter, like bells across many waters. I love the way you didn't give up on me, even when I tried to push you away."

"Legolas…" Haldir's voice held a slight teasing warning.

"But most of all," Legolas continued with a twinkle in his eye, "I love you, Haldir."

"More than all of that?" Haldir asked, a smile dancing in his eyes.

"More than all of that," Legolas confirmed.

"I guess that will do," Haldir answered, mocking a sigh of exasperation.

"It better. It's all I can offer. I love you. I love you. I love you." With every declaration Legolas pressed kisses over Haldir's face.

"Hmm," Haldir murmured, his eyes closed, loving the feeling of Legolas's administrations. "And I love you," he answered in a low, throaty voice meant only for his beloved.

Legolas continued pressing kisses down Haldir's throat, loving the spot his collarbone met the top of his ribcage. He lingered there, allowing his tongue to explore that precious crevice.

"Legolas," Haldir breathed, feeling a stirring within him.

"Yes, my love?" Legolas asked, not bringing his head from his love's neck. He pressed kisses over his neck, tenderly loving the feel of Haldir's heart beating in the vein in his neck.

"You're doing things to me," Haldir murmured, not daring to say more.

"Hmm. I hope so. You're doing things to me, too." His kisses were now in Haldir's ear. Quickly he darted his tongue into that space, allowing it to run along the ridge to the gentle point at the end.

Haldir gasped, his breath coming shallow and ragged. "Don't stop, _meleth_."

"Don't stop?" Legolas echoed, breathing the words into his ear. Allowing his hands to wander, he let them explore the expanse of Haldir's chest beneath his tunic. That perfect chest that he had longed to explore and cover with multitudes of feather kisses. "That shouldn't be too hard," he answered, stopping his movements long enough to remove the tunic from over Haldir's head. Gazing at the exposed chest, love surged through Legolas's veins. "You're beautiful!" he exclaimed in awe, drinking in the sight of Haldir's milky skin in the moonlight.

Haldir opened his eyes slowly, unwilling to let go of the feelings that were sweeping over him. He was amazed at the look in Legolas's eyes: a look that spoke volumes of his love for him, a look that went beyond words and left his soul exposed to him. Leaning forward he placed his lips on Legolas's and tasted his sweetness there. "I know how you feel," Haldir answered the unspoken words. He allowed his gaze to hold with Legolas's for a deep moment, awed at the rawness he found there. "You are precious to me, Legolas. There are no words."

Legolas groaned and pitched forward to capture Haldir's mouth with his own. Haldir opened his own mouth willingly and allowed Legolas to explore that space with his tongue. He in turn thrust his tongue into Legolas's mouth, loving the feeling of the duel they were fighting there. Gladly he surrendered to Legolas's will, and leaned back as Legolas broke the kiss to explore the rest of his body.

Slowly Legolas dropped his mouth to Haldir's collarbone, his hands resting on Haldir's slender waist. Pressing kisses along the bone there, he allowed his hands to do his exploring for him, running them up the hardened abs to the twin peaks of his breast. He was perfect; Legolas loved the feel of him under his hands.

Haldir arched back, inviting Legolas to explore further. Needing no further prompting, Legolas lowered his mouth to the hardened nipple, his tongue circling the rugged areola, his teeth lightly nipping the bud there. Haldir gasped and writhed beneath him, but Legolas ignored him, feeling enamored with Haldir's body. He trailed his kisses lower, loving the feel of the smooth skin beneath his touch.

"Legolas!" Haldir gasped, trying to get his attention.

"Yes _meleth-nin_?" Legolas murmured before darting his tongue into the cavity created by Haldir's bellybutton. "What is it?"

"You need to stop, my love," Haldir answered, gasping.

Legolas stopped immediately and looked at Haldir's face with concern in his eyes. "Are you okay?" he asked worried.

"More than okay, _meleth_, but if you keep going, I fear we'll both lose control."

A wicked gleam came to Legolas's eyes as they danced merrily at the suggestion.

"Don't give me that look, my love," Haldir warned. "We still need to finish our conversation."

Legolas sighed, the mood suddenly killed with Haldir's comment. He sat back on his heels and allowed Haldir to find his tunic and dress himself. "Yes, you're right, of course," he answered. "How good of you to remind me."

"Now don't give me your sarcasm," Haldir answered matter-of-factly. "We both know we can't go any further without talking about this. What are we going to do about your father?"

Legolas hung his head, thinking. "I don't know, Haldir, I just don't know. He will never consent to this union. I fear his wrath at telling him and you will be sent far away. I don't know how we can find a way to be together."

"Is there no one in your family to give their consent?"

"No one but my father. I am an only child and my mother has been gone for many years and I never knew her family. My father has no living siblings and Oropher, my father's sire, was slain during the Last Alliance's assault on Sauron. I never knew him."

"I'm sorry, Legolas," said Haldir, trying to be of some comfort to his betrothed.

"It's okay, Haldir. It just means we must find another way."

"My parents, too, are gone. All that is left of my family are my two brothers, both of whom you know. They have already given their blessing to this relationship. Indeed," continued Haldir wryly, thinking back to the conversation he had with them on the archery field all those weeks ago, "they gave their blessing before I even told them how I felt about you."

"So all we need to figure out is now how to get my father's blessing," Legolas said, feeling depressed.

"_Meleth_, need we go to him at all? Is there no one else we could go to? Is there no one else who knows your secret who could give their blessing?"

Legolas allowed his thoughts to flit quickly to Daugion, his one time closest friend and boon companion. Daugion knew of course, but things had changed…

"No one," Legolas said, resigned. "This is something that I've kept to myself my entire life. And now I've found one in whom my happiness rests, and only my father keeps us from being wed."

"I see what great unhappiness he brings to your countenance whenever this is brought up," Haldir answered. "As long as he is so against this, our union could remain secret."

Legolas looked up, amazed at Haldir's words. "You would do that for me?" he asked in awe, "You would give up the freedom of an open marriage with me, to live in secrecy for the rest of our lives, never revealing our relationship to anyone?"

"I would," Haldir stated firmly. "I would rather live in a secret marriage with you than to live my life separate from you. If your father is so against this, against us that you fear for our lives, I will not bring you grief by revealing this union to him."

"You do not know what you are saying!" Legolas cried, angry and frustrated. "I have lived with this secret in my heart for my entire life. To ask you to do the same; nay, to ask you to keep our joy secret would be a poison that would eventually kill you and me both. And who would marry us? Without the king's blessing, I know of no one who would consent to this thing. Without my father's forgiveness, asking you to live in a secret marriage would be a prison for us both.

"Alas, alas! I do not know what to do!" Legolas cried, stricken. "To marry you would bring such grief into your life… I cannot ask that of you. But to face my father – Haldir, we would never receive his blessing, even if by some miracle he could forgive us."

Haldir looked at his beloved's face and traced it with his fingers tenderly, trying to comfort him. "Legolas, calm yourself," he said. "We will figure this out, you and I. Maybe not tonight or in the coming nights, but I am a patient Elf. The Valar have given us this great gift, and with their help, we will find a way to let our love bloom."

Trying to ignore the haunted look in Legolas's eyes, Haldir reached forward and kissed him tenderly. "Love will make a way, Legolas. It's brought us this far. It will see us through."

"I hope you're right, Haldir," said Legolas, finding strength in the other's calm. Relaxing slightly, he allowed Haldir to pull him into his embrace. "Whatever happens, know that I love you."

"I know you do," Haldir answered, soothing Legolas by stroking his head. "I know you do."

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Once they arrived in Esgaroth, the Men said their farewells to the Elves of Mirkwood. Despite the kind invitations they received to spend some time there to recuperate, Legolas declined to stay. Now with the heat of battle over, he suddenly felt a great pull in his spirit to return to Mirkwood. Something was urging him to make haste, though he could not exactly locate the feeling.

Revion, too, had expressed a great need to return to Mirkwood as quickly as possible. "Something is wrong," he had told Legolas, "My soul speaks it."

"I'm sorry," Legolas had told the Men, "I thank you for your assistance in this and I am sorry for your losses. I wish you all comfort during this time of mourning. Still I think something great has also occurred here; may this alliance continue to grow and strengthen between Mirkwood and Esgaroth. But we cannot remain here long. We accept your hospitality for the night and the provisions you offer us, but when the morning breaks, we must be on our way."

And so it was. The Men gave them rest in their homes and food and water for the road and used the time to urge the Elves to stay and rest. Despite their protests, however, when the morning came, Legolas led his Elves down the road towards Mirkwood with promises to continue the trade that had arisen between the two lands.

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"What is it, Legolas?" Haldir asked after several hours of riding silently next to each other.

"I do not know," Legolas answered with a faraway look in his eyes and fell silent once more.

"Something troubles you," Haldir said, trying again.

"Yes," answered Legolas, feeling the weight on his soul. "My heart is oppressed, my need great."

Haldir shook his head at the cryptic answers he was getting from his love. Whatever was wrong, Legolas obviously just needed space to deal with it.

"If you need to talk about it…" Haldir trailed off, letting Legolas know he was there for him.

Legolas nodded absent-mindedly and Haldir sighed, resigned to riding along with him in silence.

It was something more than being troubled by the matter of his father. Haldir felt that strongly, for it was not only Legolas who was acting this way. Revion and some of the other friends he made during the past few months were also acting strangely, and a force beyond their control seemed to be pushing them forward. Rest stops were few and only for the sake of the horses with them; otherwise they pressed on both day and night, sleeping on their feet when they needed rest and forgetting to take nourishment.

Haldir and his brothers spoke seldom, for it seemed to them that indeed, theirs were the only conversations to be heard in the forest, and it felt somehow wrong to speak in the face of this great weight. It was more than the loss of their comrades and friends; whatever was driving this group pushed forward with such urgency that it felt practically tangible to the Lothlόrien Elves, though they themselves did not feel it in their own souls.

Because of the urgency that most, if not all, of the army felt, the trip that had taken them two weeks on the way to Esgaroth took them several days less coming back. On the last day of their controlled yet frantic march, even Haldir and his brothers began to feel the urgency and dread welling up in their souls. Something indeed was wrong; the smell of fear was strong in their midst.

"Haldir," Legolas breathed, not knowing what else to say.

"Yes, my love, I feel it too."

They were almost home. It was only another ten miles, five miles, one mile…

As they rounded the corner, the city they called home came into view and the army stopped as one, horror written clearly on each of their faces. Now the dread they had been feeling came upon them strongly, what had been haunting them was now identified.

The gates of the city were hanging off their hinges, twisted and broken. The houses that lined the way up to the castle were in ruins; some had broken windows and doors while others were still smoldering from the heat of the fires that had been set. Bodies littered the ground; children and adults alike lay there unmoving, their twisted faces frozen in looks of terror.

Elves were moving throughout the grounds, slowly and deliberately, removing the bodies towards freshly dug graves. Some were working on putting out the remaining fires while others were clearing debris away. No one marked the return of their army; indeed, they were too focused on their tasks at hand.

It was eerily silent. No birds called, no singing was on the air.

"Dear Eru, what has happened here?" breathed Legolas, the dread turning to stone in his stomach.

TBC…


	10. Homecoming

A/N: This chapter is more of an interlude than anything. Given the destruction they just came home to, I thought it only appropriate.

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Legolas led the army through the destroyed city, careful not to disturb the fallen bodies. They proceeded slowly, still in shock over what they were witnessing. After so many years of peace, this rape upon their land was unthinkable. After all the careful reports, the steady years of fighting off any attackers that lurked in the woods…

Thranduil had always taught Legolas the value of helping others out. "There will come a day, Legolas," Thranduil had told his son, "when someone will come to you for help. When that day comes, you will have to make a decision: either you ignore their plea or you agree to help them. Whenever possible, choose the latter. The former is selfish and not the way of the Elves. Additionally, you never know when the day might come that you will in turn cry out for help. And if you are true and noble and kind to those who first came to you, you will always have an ally. But if you turn down those who turn to you, who will come to your side in your time of need? Above all things, treasure charity. For what you provide to others will be revisited upon yourself in days and years to come."

That is what he had said over and over again, trying to impress upon his son the importance of placing others before himself. And perhaps those words had helped Legolas to decide to help the Dwarves, after all. But looking over the destruction left in his wake, Legolas suddenly feared he had made a colossal mistake. While he was out, pretending to lead an attack on a dragon, playing at rescuer of Middle-earth, he was needed most at home, with his own people.

Guilt flooded over Legolas. These were his people, his responsibility! He had set them aside to aid those who had long been held as their enemies and now look what happened!

Suddenly a piercing cry went up, disturbing the chill air with its sharp clarity. Legolas turned to see what was happening and saw a soldier falling out of ranks to kneel by one of the lifeless bodies. He took her into his arms and rocked her, anguish etched into every line of his face.

Slowly the eyes of the army turned away from the Elf's grief and looked towards Legolas, silent questions echoing in each of their eyes. Legolas gazed back at them, suddenly aware that they were waiting on him to make a decision.

"Go," he whispered, feeling a clutching feeling in his throat.

The army needed no further prompting. What each of them had been dreading for days was laid bare before their eyes and the sight was too much to bear with stoic demeanors. Quietly they disbanded, each going to their own homes to learn for themselves what terrors awaited them there.

Haldir and his brothers stood next to the Elven prince, trying to support them with their presence. Legolas did not seem to notice, however. He stood silently, shock echoing in his eyes, grief mingling with guilt and fear in his countenance.

Orophin and Rúmil glanced at each other and at Haldir, unsure of what to do. Haldir looked back at them, pain reflecting from his eyes. He shook his head at them sadly. "You might as well go. See if you can learn anything."

They nodded in understanding. Rúmil squeezed Haldir's shoulder looking into his brother's face for a moment before following Orophin.

"Legolas?" Haldir prompted softly.

Finally sensing that another was still with him, Legolas turned to face the one he had betrothed on that not so long ago evening. What happy bliss was that moment! What perfect ignorance!

"Haldir," he breathed, releasing a choked sob that had been captured in his chest.

"Come here," Haldir said, wrapping his arms around his beloved, heedless of how this might appear under normal circumstances. These were far from normal times. Now he would appear only as a friend, comforting another at the loss and destruction that lay around them.

"Haldir!" Legolas sobbed again, his cries muffled into Haldir's shoulder as he wrapped his arms tightly around his frame.

"Legolas," Haldir soothed, "let us get back to the palace. Maybe we can find some answers there."

Legolas shook his head against Haldir, unable to release his hold on him. Instead he squeezed tighter, clinging to the only boon he had left in this world that was collapsing around him. "I dare not. My place is with my people."

"Do you not owe your people the decency of finding out what happened? And is not your place also with your father?"

"Ada," Legolas breathed, suddenly releasing Haldir and looking up into his eyes. "Yes, I must go to him at once!" Turning quickly, he set off in a dead run for the castle, Haldir trailing behind.

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It was as he had been fearing for days. The link between them had been weakening and was growing increasingly dim. It terrified him. But that was nothing compared to what he felt now.

His house was in shambles. Soot streaked down the sides of the remaining two walls, marking where the fire had licked up the sides before they had somehow been extinguished. The common areas were completely gone; what once had been the rooms where they entertained guests were now leveled; piles of ashes marked what once had been furniture.

He barely noticed any of this. She was here somewhere, but her presence fading quickly. He dashed through the remains of his house, searching desperately.

The back rooms where the sleeping chambers were, for the most part, unharmed. Soot covered much of the walls and some furniture but that was all. It was here, in his own bedroom that he found her.

"Raina!" he sobbed, rushing over to her. She was still alive, he could feel it. But she was weak, oh so very weak…

"Revion?" the voice of his beloved was barely a rasping whisper. She coughed, the sound harsh and dry.

"It's okay, it's okay!" Revion kept repeating, cradling her in his arms and rocking her, not knowing what else to say.

"It's time for me to go, _meleth-nin_," she whispered.

"I cannot let you go! Do not leave me!" Revion cried, desperate tears streaking down his cheeks.

"You must. I love you. Be strong for me, my love," she said, gazing into his eyes and placing her hand on his cheek. Then she fell back, limp.

"Raina!" he cried loudly, "RAINA!" But it was too late. The bond was severed. She was gone.

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Daugion stood silently outside the palace, gazing back over the ransacked city. Deep hollows in his eyes marked the fullness of his suffering.

He had no family to speak of, but this city was his home, the people here his responsibility. Why was he not here for them? Why had he not followed his gut instinct and refused to go with Legolas?

Fool prince! His place was with the people, not off playing warrior-king! This was all his fault… Legolas should have known better. _He _should have known better!

"Ai!" he cried, falling to his knees in grief, stricken too deeply for words.

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"Ada!" Legolas cried, running into his father's bedchamber in something close to a panic. Relief mingled with disappointment to find him there. Although the king apparently still had not awakened yet, he was alive and unharmed. Valar only knew what might have happened…

Haldir hung back, not wanting to impose during this deeply intimate moment. He and Legolas might be engaged, but some things were still better left to do in private.

"Ada," Legolas whispered, taking the king's hand in both of his. "Ada, I am so sorry."

The room fell silent for a moment as Legolas struggled to find the words for what he needed to say. But nothing was coming to him except the unfathomably deep remorse that threatened to choke him.

"I'm so sorry, Ada!" he cried again breaking the stillness with a rasping sob, "I'm so sorry!"

Clutching his father's hand like a lifeline, he curled up onto the bed along side him, throwing one arm around his body. Slowly he rocked himself in this fetal position, sobbing the only words that he knew how to say, the words that could never be enough.

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"I need answers," an exhausted Legolas said wearily. "What has happened here?"

The room was silent as the king's advisors and counselors looked at one another, each hoping someone else would be the first to speak.

"Well?" Legolas demanded.

Still no one spoke.

"Glanhelmion," Legolas tried again, this time directing his question to the council member he liked the best, "What has happened here?"

"They came without warning, Prince Legolas," Glanhelmion said hesitantly, "The attack was from the west; Wild Men, mostly. Some _Yrch_ as well. It was three days ago." He fell silent, hanging his head in grief. After a long minute, he spoke again, his voice catching. "They came with torches, setting fire to the perimeter. The guards on watch were shot down. Those who weren't killed instantly… many died from the burns in the healer's wing within the next day or so. Only two remain, but they are hurt badly; they're hardly recognizable and they can't speak. The healers are surprised they've held on this long. They say it's only a matter of time before they too succumb."

He fell silent once again, pain etched into his face. Legolas put his head in his hand and closed his eyes, trying to block out the horrid picture Glanhelmion was painting.

"I don't know how to tell you this," Glanhelmion said somberly, "but your friends Urúvion and Thorontur were on duty that night. They did not survive."

Legolas blanched. "Then what happened?" he pressed, not opening his eyes.

"Someone raised the alarm. Children were screaming, everything was chaos. The gate was wrenched from its hinges and then they came. We rushed to meet them head-on; all who were left fought. But we were few against many; it did not take long for them to ransack the entire city.

"We had no quarrel with them, no advance warning that anything was amiss. It was like they came out of the mist of the forest itself. Some attacked from behind and we were quickly surrounded.

"As soon as we heard the alarm, we moved the king to a secure location deep within the caves. We barricaded against their assault, should it reach that deeply in; fortunately it did not."

Glanhelmion paused. Legolas, not knowing how to respond also remained silent, trying to absorb all the information being thrown at him. How did something like this happen? And why? So many questions…

"They set fire to the city; children were slain and many women raped. We fought back and managed for a short while to push them back, but they were too many and too strong. Just about the time we thought it was all over for us, suddenly the assault ceased and they retreated as quickly as they came.

"At first we thought you were returning early and were coming to our aid and that scared them off. But obviously that was not the case. So then we thought something even fouler was about to descend that ran them off and we prepared to meet our deaths, but nothing happened. They were just… gone."

Another advisor sitting at the table named Rimedur finally spoke. "We figured it must have been some prearranged signal that broke off their attack. Perhaps they were looking for something and they found it."

"Or maybe they didn't find it," Morcion interjected.

Legolas looked up. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"I mean your father. Perhaps with you gone, they used this opportunity to strike us when we're most vulnerable. After all, the king is in no position to defend himself. But when they reached his quarters and found him gone… perhaps that is what stopped them."

"Speculation," Legolas muttered, angrily. "It's all pure speculation! I don't know why this happened and we have nothing to go on but wild imaginings. What does it matter right now? What I need to know is what's being done to restore the city and to safeguard it against another attack."

"They dare not attack again so soon," said a pale-faced advisor whom Legolas had always particularly disliked.

"And why not?" Legolas retorted angrily. "Why shouldn't they attack again? They've already razed the city; their path would be clear. If they were looking for something… or someone… and did not, in fact, find it, what's to keep them from trying again?"

"Think about what you're saying, Prince Legolas!" Morcion interjected, "You have returned, and with you, the entire army. If they were to attack again, I do not think they would be so foolish as to try something while the acting king was here and our strength returned. It was no accident that this happened while you were gone."

"He's right," a voice from the back of the hallway sounded.

The council along with Legolas turned to look at the speaker. He was a tall figure, clothed in a grey cloak and wore a tall, pointed hat. In his hand was held a familiar staff.

"It was no accident this happened while you were gone," the gravelly voice continued as the figure began to approach their table. "With the army gone and the king incapacitated, who would be there to stop them?"

The person stopped as he reached the head of the table where Legolas sat in mild astonishment. "Hello Legolas," he said looking fondly down at the prince.

"Mithrandir!" Legolas breathed, feeling some tension ease from his body upon seeing his long-time friend.

"On the other hand," the wizard continued as if there was no interruption, "I do not think that they will be returning any time soon. They have fled."

"And what makes you think that?" demanded Morcion, still clinging to his position.

Mithrandir turned to look at the contrary advisor. "Because," he said calmly, "they already did what they came to do."

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"What do you mean, exactly?" asked Legolas later, pacing the floor of his father's study.

"I mean exactly what I just said," Mithrandir answered calmly, sitting in one of the chairs in the corner, watching Legolas's restless movements. "The White Council has just been formed to keep an eye on the Necromancer whose power lies in Dol Guldur. You have seen the growing darkness, Legolas. There is great evil in the world though we do not yet understand it. This attack on your kingdom was nothing more than an attack. If the enemy sees an opportunity present itself to weaken the free peoples of Middle-earth, then he will strike."

"Who is he, Mithrandir? How can we fight something we cannot understand?" Legolas asked impatiently, ceasing his pacing long enough to look to his friend for an answer.

Mithrandir shook his head. "His identity we do not as yet know, though I have my suspicions. But he will gather the dark things of Arda to him, orcs and spiders and those who are easily swayed by power. And then he will wait until the moment is right.

"It was his fortune, then, when the dragon Smaug attacked in the east. He could not have planned this for as we know, dragons are neither on one side or another and are not easily swayed. But that Smaug should cause so much destruction there and drive the peoples living in that land out became a great asset to him. And when you left, why, you left your kingdom exposed and ready for the taking."

"Ai!" Legolas cried in dismay. "Then it is all my fault!"

"Nay," the wizard answered reassuringly, "You did what I think your father would have done. Turning to aid one another during these times is a sign of unification and strength against he that would tear this Middle-earth apart. You cannot fault yourself for this admirable quality, Legolas."

"So what am I to do now, Mithrandir? I am in desperate need of your good council. My father lies ill for these past three and a half months and I know not how to bring him about. I have led his people into a battle we had no hope of winning, coming back defeated and our numbers reduced. And upon our return, all we see is destruction surrounding us. I feel helpless against such hatred. How are we to stand up to this?"

"Rebuild," Mithrandir answered in a word.

"Rebuild? That's it? That's all you came to say?" Legolas was incredulous.

"No, it is not all I have come to say," said Mithrandir firmly, standing to emphasize his point, "but all that will wait for another time. For now, suffice it to say, you need to rebuild. Make this a stronghold for your people, Legolas. For now, it is all you can do. And that will be enough."

"Enough for what, though? It cannot bring my father back. It cannot heal all those who have been injured or help those who mourn. I cannot undo what has been done here."

"No! No it can't. But it can help bring a sense of security to these people and it can help save them in the future. It can give them something to do, something to keep busy with. And the time for mourning will come. We will all grieve, Legolas, in our own way."

Legolas remained silent, contemplating the wizard's words. "You said you came for another reason," he said finally.

Mithrandir sat back down and leaned back. "Two reasons, actually. One is purely political and can wait until things get settled here. The other is personal."

He stopped, apparently content in believing he had said enough. Legolas, however, waited for him to continue and when he didn't, he prompted him. "Well?" he asked.

"Oh, it is of no immediate consequence," the wizard answered vaguely. "Now is not the time, however."

For the first time in days Legolas almost smiled. "You still speak in riddles, friend."

"Do I?" Mithrandir asked, a smile ghosting his face.

"Indeed you do," Legolas answered, his features softening in fondness. He paused, but then his curiosity got the better of him. "Can you not even give a hint?"

Mithrandir arched a questioning eyebrow at him. "It is about our mutual friend, Haldir," he answered.

"Haldir!" Legolas exclaimed, surprised. "What is this about, Mithrandir?"

The wizard smiled enigmatically. "I hear you and he have become quite the good friends."

"Well, yes," Legolas answered, wondering how Mithrandir knew this information already. "Haldir has proven himself invaluable and is a true and loyal friend besides. We have been blessed by his presence."

"Ah," Mithrandir answered, smiling.

"What is it, _mellon-nin_?" asked Legolas, curiosity driving his slight smile even wider.

"Oh nothing, nothing," Mithrandir assured him, smiling to himself. "I'm glad to hear it."

Legolas looked at his friend questioningly, but the wizard would say no more.

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The rains came the next day like a soothing balm on the torn land. At first light had dawned slowly and grey. No sun was visible, but the sky grew increasingly bright until it filled the sky with its whitish hue, a cool light shining through and against the stone colored sky. The air was damp, signaling the coming showers, but it was not heavy as it can feel when the world is wet; rather the dampness came more like dew that had slowly collected through the night and left the grasses gleaming by lamplight.

Sometime by mid-morning the Elves began to realize that it was raining soft against the harsh landscape. What had begun as a misting slowly materialized into comforting drops, thin and many in number that hit the ground in a light pattering, the sound like animal paws over leaves, its touch like that of a small child's.

By late afternoon, however, the rain began to fall in earnest. Heavy drops dropped to the ground in decided plops where they broke apart and sprayed off in hundreds of different directions. Work outside was halted as the Elves sought shelter from the storm.

Legolas stood by an open window in his quarters and silently thanked Ulmo blessing them with this rain. It helped cool the still warm embers and washed away the stain of the recent battle on the land. The earth was softened in its caress, making it easier for digging graves and laying new foundations. It was a healing rain, one desperately needed but not anticipated by the Woodland realm.

"What are you thinking?" Haldir asked him quietly, observing the contemplative look on the prince's face.

"We will need to make a time when we can come together as a people to mourn," answered Legolas, not turning his eyes from the rain outside. "I have met with the advisors earlier today and planned a time of remembrance for us all."

Haldir nodded. "When will this gathering be?"

Legolas sighed. "A great and terrible thing has happened here. It is so raw, so fresh that it is hard to understand. I don't want to rush things. But too long of a delay is an insult."

"So what have you decided?"

"Three days hence," Legolas answered. "In three days we will mourn those we lost and observe this commemoration for one week. At the end of the week, we will set into motion the plans for the new city, mindful of what we have lost and will look to what can be improved for the future."

"I think that is wise," Haldir answered thoughtfully.

At this Legolas turned from the window to cock a half-smile that always set Haldir's knees weak. "It should; it was by Mithrandir's suggestion that we decided these things."

"Ah," answered Haldir, drawing the syllable out and smiling, "so I see!"

"Do not think me incapable of finding an occasional wisdom, _meleth-nin_," Legolas retorted, his eyes holding a gleam of amusement. "I am still _Sinda_."

"And I'm glad for it," Haldir replied appreciatively. Standing, he approached Legolas and wrapped his arms around him.

"Oh Haldir," Legolas sighed, leaning his head against the slightly taller Elf's chest, "What's to happen next?"

Haldir rested his head against Legolas's. "I don't know, _meleth-nin_, I don't know." He pressed his lips chastely against his betrothed's hair. "But I do know we will face it together."

TBC…

A/N: Again I show my ignorance and foolishness of trying to write a story during this time period when I have no idea what events were happening in Middle-earth at the time. So yes, I do know that Gandalf had already gone to Dol Guldur and knows it is Sauron is gathering his strength there (at least, that's what I've gathered from doing my homework for this chapter), but for the sake of this story, I have no hesitation in bending the truth in these details... because that's all they are: details.

A/N part two: If you haven't noticed on my profile, I have decided to see this story through to its original conclusion, despite the ever decreasing number of people reading this (though at the rate I'm losing readers, I'll have negative numbers reading by then!). I just can't let go of this story... it's had a hold on me for at least a year or more. So while I know where I'm headed, I am curious about how you, my tiny audience, would suggest resolving the issue with Thranduil: do Legolas and Haldir tell him of their relationship? Does he find out some other way? And if so, how does he react? Or do they just keep their betrothal a secret? --I'm pretty sure I know what I'm going to do with this, but I'd love your thoughts regardless. Thanks in advance!


	11. Changes

The rain had let up long enough for the remaining burials to take place before it cut loose from the sky with demanding fervor. For nine days straight the world was awash in grey while ash and soot was washed away and the stench that had been in the land was but a memory; vivid and intense and horrid in its ramification, but still only a memory.

But the day after the last day of official mourning for the kingdom the sun broke out in a blaze of glory, drying the land in its warm gladness. And the Elves were thankful.

Nothing could replace those lives that were lost in the assault; for centuries to come the Elves of Mirkwood would feel the loss of their loved ones. But for all their grief, seeing the sun again seemed to be a herald of better times to come.

With the advent of this new day also began one of the most ambitious building projects that Mirkwood had ever had in the recollection of all but the oldest of Elves. Despite his deep grief for those lives lost, including those of several dear friends, Legolas took his role of acting king seriously during the week of mourning. Every day he met with both his father's advisors and Mithrandir, laying the groundwork for rebuilding so that when the sun came out, the Elves suddenly found themselves with something new to occupy their time and energy.

They began with the perimeter, strengthening the wall that surrounded their keep against the attacks of those creatures that lived in the forest. Powerful spells were cast by Mithrandir to fortify the surround and while the rebuilding would end up taking several years to complete, the kingdom immediately began to feel more secure and they praised Legolas highly for his leadership in the face of such monumental challenges to his reign.

Even Legolas, the hesitant king, found new energy in the project he himself had created. Still unaccustomed to the weight of responsibility that his father had fielded all these centuries he nevertheless began to feel more comfortable in the role than he ever had before. Perhaps having the support of friends like Revion and Gondien, the advice of a wise wizard, and the love of a wonderful Elf like Haldir helped bolster him, but even so, the prince began to feel less guilty and became more determined than ever to return his father's kingdom to its former strength with every passing day.

"There was nothing more you could have done," Haldir had told him on more than one occasion, "You did your father's bidding to aid the Dwarves, and it was a valiant thing to do. You cannot continue to beat yourself up over the fact that you are still only one Elf and there is no possible way for you to have been in two places at once. Even if you had not left, this attack could still have happened."

Legolas did not know when he started to believe Haldir's words, but by the time the plans were ready for laying the new foundation for the kingdom, he had taken them to heart.

"Why do you love me?" he asked Haldir after the first day of rebuilding, wanting to feel the comfort that he found in his words. He was lying in his arms, content for the moment.

Haldir looked up in surprise. "I think you're beautiful, Legolas, both inside and out. The world has been recently cruel to you and yet you still manage to persevere and stand firm in the face of such adversity."

"I hardly think I've stood firm," Legolas observed almost sarcastically. "I've fought so hard against the responsibilities that come with being royalty and when the role of king is suddenly thrust upon my shoulders, I've done nothing but waffle between one decision and the next."

"Well, I'd hardly expect you to be the perfect king in your first few weeks," Haldir answered.

Legolas shrugged, saying nothing. He still had his personal beliefs on this matter, no matter what Haldir thought. But that Haldir thought such things warmed him in a way he could not quite understand. Then, thinking back to Haldir's answer to his question, he changed the subject.

"So is that really why you love me?" he asked slyly, "It has nothing whatsoever to do with your dreams the river gave you?"

He felt Haldir stiffen beneath him. "How do you know about those?" he asked tensely.

"You talk in your sleep, _meleth_," Legolas answered, chuckling.

Haldir's eyes went wide and he groaned. "So you've known all this time?"

"Yes!" answered Legolas, grinning and feeling quite self-satisfied. "It's been fun watching you try to cover up your feelings whenever I came in the room…"

"You're cruel, _meleth-nin_," said Haldir feeling slightly disgruntled.

Legolas twisted to look into Haldir's unhappy face. He smiled and quickly leaned in to peck Haldir on the lips. "Relax, _meleth_," he said, "I loved you, too."

Haldir still felt like holding on to his perturbation but despite himself he could feel some of the tension drain. "I feel better then, thinking of you equally uncomfortable with your thoughts that you couldn't do anything about those feelings," he answered somewhat satisfied.

"That I did, Haldir, that I did," Legolas answered, pulling Haldir into his embrace. Burying his head into the mane of Haldir's hair he kissed his neck before leaving a lingering kiss on his beloved's mouth. "Thank the Valar I got over myself," he murmured.

Haldir smiled, his discontentment leaving him entirely. "Thank the Valar indeed," he answered, capturing his prince's lips in his own once more.

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"Legolas! Come quick! Your father is awake!"

The cry reached his ears before the messenger did. He looked up from the plans he was working on, startled. Meeting his eyes was a young _ellon_ he knew from the palace running towards him, his eyes wild. The boy reached him slightly breathless and stared at Legolas intently. "Your father!" he urged, tugging Legolas's sleeve.

A light came to the prince's eyes. "When?" he asked, abandoning his work to follow the youth.

"Just now! Your friend Gondien was with him and the king suddenly stirred and opened his eyes. Gondien called out and grabbed me as I was passing the room and told me to come get you."

"I'm glad you did!" cried Legolas, running towards the palace. "Thank you ever so much!"

"Your welcome!" the _ellon_ answered, excited to see his prince seem glad for the first time in many months. "Tell the king I am glad for his return!"

"I will!" Legolas promised. The boy smiled and waved and fell behind, his original chore forgotten in his enthusiasm.

Legolas reached his father's room in record speed. He scarcely dared to hope…

But sure enough when he looked into the room, Thranduil was sitting up, awake and alert.

"Ada!" Legolas cried gladly, throwing himself onto his father's lap and pulling his father into an enormous hug.

"Legolas, child," answered Thranduil, surprised at his son's reaction and unsure how to respond.

"Ada, I'm so glad to have you back!" Legolas said, joyful tears streaming down his face.

"Gondien tells me I have been asleep for over three months," Thranduil told him, hardly able to believe such news.

"Closer to four months, actually," Legolas answered.

"Four months!" the king exclaimed. "I scarcely can believe it!" He fell silent for a moment. "So you have been king in my absence," he said finally, his face unreadable.

Before Legolas could respond, however, a voice interrupted from the hallway. "Legolas! I heard the good news! King Thranduil! It is wonderful to see you awake, sir!"

"Haldir!" Thranduil answered, amazement in his voice. "What are you still doing here?"

"Ah," Haldir stalled, unsure how to respond.

"Ada," Legolas interjected, "a lot has happened during these months. We need to talk."

"We do indeed, Legolas," Thranduil answered. "It's time you brought me up to date."

"That can come later, Ada," Legolas said firmly. "Right now is not the time."

"Now is _always_ a good time," Thranduil stressed, "I need to know what has happened since I fell asleep."

Haldir, Gondien, and Legolas all exchanged glances.

Seeing this silent exchange, Thranduil prompted his son. "Legolas?" he asked.

"Ada, perhaps you should get dressed and take a turn about the palace. You haven't walked in a long time and you should try to regain your strength."

"You're stalling, Legolas," Thranduil answered, brushing off Legolas's excuse. "Why don't you start by telling me, ah yes, I remember, what happened with the Dwarves? It's all so hazy now, I can hardly remember what my dreams were and what reality was, but as I recall, the last thing that happened was that I was sitting down with a contingency from Erabor. What happened then?"

Legolas sighed, resigned. "Haldir, Gondien, could you give us some privacy?" he asked.

The two Elves nodded and took their leave, closing the door behind them.

"I'm glad I'm not in Legolas's shoes," Gondien commented as they walked away.

Haldir nodded. "Me too, _mellon-nin_, me too." But in his heart he wished he was by Legolas's side, supporting him through what was sure to be a difficult conversation.

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All in all, Legolas did not know what to make of his conversation with his father. It could have been worse. But it could have been better. Mostly, however, it left him feeling slightly confused and above all, he honestly could not begin to fathom what his father was thinking. He was so non-committal, so stoic and calm that Legolas might have doubted that he heard his son at all, but for the look of concern etched in his face.

A knock sounded on the door.

"It's open, Haldir," Legolas called, not stirring from his seat in the open window.

The door opened and Haldir stepped in, carefully closing it behind him. "How did it go?" he asked, avoiding asking Legolas how he knew it was him knocking.

Legolas shrugged distractedly. "I'm not sure."

"What do you mean?" Haldir asked, settling himself in the chair opposite Legolas.

"Well, he did not shout or scold," Legolas answered, then paused. "In fact he did not say much at all."

Haldir arched his eyebrow thoughtfully. "Well, it is rather a lot to take in all at once," he commented, "and take it from someone who knows; emerging from dreams such as the river can provide is a very disorienting thing. I was only asleep for three days. Your father is dealing with nearly a third of a year's worth. I would imagine it is hard for him to emerge to what is reality, what his life is and what it means for him to be king after existing in a world limited only by the expanse of imagination."

"I suppose you're right," Legolas answered.

"Did he speak of what he dreamt?" Haldir asked, suddenly curious.

Legolas threw back his head and laughed shortly. "No! And I suspect he never will."

"Why do you say that?" Haldir asked. "It would seem that as this has been his entire life these past months he would be bound to mention something at least once in a while, even if it's in a moment of disorientation."

Legolas looked at Haldir with an odd look on his face.

Haldir felt a nervous smile touch his lips at Legolas's scrutiny. "What?" he asked.

"You really don't know my father at all," Legolas answered, smiling.

"I'd commend your powers of observation," retorted Haldir, "if that wasn't such an obvious statement."

"My father is _never_ confused or disoriented," Legolas explained. "Or at least he will never appear so. He is so in control, always in command of his thoughts and feelings. And to reveal his dreams would be too personal, like giving away some great part of himself that he's just unable to give."

"That makes sense somehow," Haldir commented. "From what little I do know of him he does seem like the sort to keep that sort of thing to himself. But even to his son? Will he not even stop being the king in your presence and let his own family in?"

Legolas gave him a wry look. "He will keep me at arm's length _especially_. I don't really know him all that well; I don't know if he has anyone he turns to, if he has anyone he calls a true friend."

"Surely he must," argued Haldir, "No one can be so isolated, so alone in the world as to not have anyone to love."

"I can't argue that," said Legolas warmly, a look of fondness coming to his eyes as he looked at the Elf who had captured his heart. "But I do know that since my mother died my father has been a different person. I was very young when she died; I barely remember her. But I do remember that after she died my father and I just stopped being able to communicate. And when I finally realized that I preferred males, well, it pretty much effectively stopped any real relationship that we might have had. Basically I don't ask questions about his life and he doesn't ask about mine."

Haldir looked at Legolas aghast. "I cannot imagine what that would be like," he said quietly. "I've always been closed to my family."

"Count yourself fortunate, then, _meleth_."

"I do," said Haldir, taking Legolas's hand in his own and kissing his fingers while looking up into his eyes lovingly. "I do."

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"How are you doing, _mellon-nin_?" Legolas asked Revion.

Revion looked back at his long-time friend with a haunted look in his eyes. He looked worn and tired and seemed only a shell of the Elf he had been only a fortnight ago. How deeply can one moment affect the rest of one's life! Legolas's heart ached for Revion, but he knew no words that could help heal the wounds to his soul.

"I don't know how to live without her," Revion said, his voice rasping and void of all the lightness Legolas had always known whenever he spoke.

Legolas clasped his friend's shoulder in a friendly gesture then gathered his friend in his arms in deep compassion. Revion stood limp and unresponsive to his touch. Legolas was glad Revion could not see the look of concern bordering on despair that was certain to be on his face.

"Oh my friend," Legolas said, trying to comfort him, "you will find joy again."

Revion shook his head hopelessly. "No," he answered. "Raina _was_ my joy. Without her, I cannot live."

Suddenly Revion pulled out of Legolas's embrace and looked deeply into his eyes. "If you ever find the one you love, Legolas, run, run, to her and never ever let her go."

Legolas nodded, his throat dry.

"Promise me, Legolas," Revion insisted, the first look of the old passion coming to his eyes since they had returned to Mirkwood.

"I promise," Legolas whispered. "I promise."

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Days began to merge together and the weeks sped by as Mirkwood slowly began to recover from the scourge upon their kingdom. Soon a month had passed and the weak areas in the wall surrounding the Elves' domain had been patched. A new gate hung from the hinges, one that was double in thickness as the old one and fortified with strong magic.

"You have done well," Thranduil told his son one day during their morning meeting.

Legolas looked up in surprise from the plans they were looking over. "How so, Ada?" he asked.

"These plans that you drew are exceptional. I know you had help from the board and Mithrandir in particular, but having talked with them, they informed me how much of this project was really created by you."

Legolas flushed, unaccustomed to any form of praise from his usually stoic father. "They're right. I had a lot of help."

Thranduil shook his head. "Don't start pretending to be modest now, Legolas. Not when you actually have a reason to be proud. This gate you designed, for example. I have never seen its equal. In the dark times that we anticipate coming, our kingdom will be more secure than ever before. The improvements you have made to our defenses assure me that Mirkwood will be a stronghold for the free peoples of Middle-earth and will not fall easily to the Necromancer.

"Additionally, I love the addition you made to the underground river. Not only will that help increase trade with our neighbors to the south but it will also double our defense system. First by allowing us to keep our gates closed against any unwelcome visitors, but more importantly it is a way out of the kingdom that is undetectable from the surface. It will also allow us to attack those who would attack us from behind. Or it can offer us a safe mode of escape, should we ever need to flee."

Legolas did not know how to respond. While he had spent many hours in council with Mithrandir on the subject of improving Mirkwood's defenses, he did not expect his ideas to be so well met from his father. For the first time they actually agreed on something.

Was this the result of having assumed the role of king while his father was ill? Did he suddenly understand more of his father because of it? Or perhaps did he actually do some maturing during these months; maturing his father always insisted he needed but he never understood? Maybe it was a little bit of all of it.

"In fact," Thranduil was continuing, "I would like you to assume responsibility for this project in its entirety."

Legolas started, his father's words jolting out of his contemplation. "W-what?" he stammered.

"You have proven yourself capable of handling this assignment. They are your ideas, your plans that are being implemented. You should be in charge of it."

"But Ada, this is your kingdom, your crown. Your people put their faith in _you_, and now that you're back, they expect you to lead them as their king," Legolas protested.

"And that also means they trust my decisions about who is best for what roles," Thranduil insisted. "They have also learned to trust you while I was gone."

Thranduil raised his hand to ward off any comment from Legolas. "I have done my own checking about the things that have transpired here and the stories all agree. Whatever you may or may not have done right these past months, the people have learned to love you and I think I would be doing wrong by them to rob them of the opportunity for them to know their prince as a capable leader.

"Besides," he added with a slight smile, "I still have other matters to attend to; as you've pointed out, I am still their king and there is much work to be done outside of this reconstruction project you have created."

Legolas was astounded. While his father had always piled on duties in the past, it was always to try to teach him something about being responsible. This was the first time Thranduil had ever given him something because he _believed_ in him.

Tears threatened to come to his eyes. "Thank you, Ada," he said softly, "I will try to make you proud."

An odd look came to Thranduil's face. "Legolas," he said, "you have already made me proud."

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"It's been nearly two months since we've become engaged," Haldir reminded Legolas one evening as they took a walk through the newly planted gardens of the palace. He was resisting the urge to take Legolas's hand in his own; it would be very unfortunate if someone were to observe this and Haldir had promised to keep their relationship a secret, but sometimes it would just be nice, just once, to show some outward sign of affection to the outside world.

"Yes it has," agreed Legolas, wondering where Haldir was going with this.

"I think it's time we made it official," Haldir said, sounding both casual and yet somehow firm at the same time.

"What do you have in mind?" Legolas asked.

"I know we have been avoiding the issue of your father," Haldir responded carefully. He could sense Legolas tense next to him. "and we don't have to talk about it right now. But I still want the blessings of our families for this marriage and you have to know that."

Legolas remained silent for a moment, thinking. "I have already told you that there is no one left in my family except my father, and I –"

"I know!" Haldir cut him off, "And I promised that he should never find out about our relationship. But surely there is someone near to you who can give us his blessing in your father's stead."

Legolas immediately thought back to his conversation with Revion a few weeks ago. He had made a promise then, but Revion could not have known he had already found that person he wanted to share his life with.

"Revion," Legolas whispered. "We could tell Revion."

"Revion?" Haldir echoed, slightly surprised. "But I thought he knew nothing of your… preferences."

"He doesn't," Legolas answered, his mouth feeling suddenly dry, "but he is the one who would give us his blessing."

Haldir was silent for a moment. "Are you sure you want to ask him, Legolas? Every day when I look at him I see almost nothing of the same Elf I met when I first came to Mirkwood. I may not know him as well as you, but he's fading. I fear for him. Are you sure you'd want to put this burden on him?"

Legolas thought back to the haunted look Revion had given him when he begged Legolas to find the one he loved. If there was anyone who could understand, who could forgive him for keeping this secret for so long, it would be Revion. If there was anyone who he could call 'brother', it was him.

"Yes, I'm sure," Legolas answered. "I think more than anything Revion needs some sense that there's still love left in the world, and I need for him to know that I've found it."

Haldir looked at Legolas with happiness dancing in his eyes. In the moonlight Legolas looked somehow more beautiful than he did in the daylight, but it was not the moon that made him truly beautiful. It was his spirit.

"I love you, _meleth-nin_," he whispered, taking Legolas's hand in his own.

"And I you," Legolas answered equally softly.

"Shall we go inform my brothers?" Haldir asked.

"Yes, let's," Legolas agreed.

"And when shall we tell Revion?" Haldir asked cautiously.

Legolas sighed, thinking. "I need to tell him alone, I think," he said. "I hope this doesn't bother you, but before we can tell him of our engagement, he needs to hear the truth about me that I've been hiding from him all these centuries. Please tell me you don't mind."

"Of course not, _meleth_," Haldir answered, "I understand. And when you're ready, we can tell him together."

Legolas nodded. "Thank you," he whispered. "I don't know what I've done to deserve you, but I thank Elbereth every day for you."

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"That's _terrific_!" whooped Rúmil excitedly after Haldir and Legolas told them their news.

"Wonderful!" Orophin announced equally glad. "I trust we're invited?"

Haldir grinned and punched his brother lightly on the shoulder. "Of course you are, you big dope!" he answered, a joy-filled grin filling his face. "Who else do I have in the world but you?"

"Me, I hope!" exclaimed Legolas, feigning being insulted.

Haldir grabbed his betrothed around the waist and landed a wet kiss on his lips. Oh the feeling of joy at being able to share this with others! He was in love with the most incredible Elf! And more astonishing than that, that same Elf loved him too and agreed to marry him!

"Of course I have you!" exclaimed Haldir, after releasing the prince's lips.

A mischievious grin came to Legolas's face. Suddenly he grabbed Haldir, dipped him, and left a long, lingering kiss on his betrothed's lips.

"You certainly do!" Legolas answered, grinning as the sounds of Haldir's brothers' hoots of approval became clear in his ears. "Now and forever more," he added.

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The next day Legolas found Revion as he was emerging from the forest where he had just been visiting Raina's grave.

"I need to talk to you," Legolas told him.

"What about?" asked Revion.

"Walk with me?" Legolas asked.

Revion nodded and they headed back into the seclusion of the trees.

"Do you remember when you told me if I ever found the one I loved that I should never let her go?"

Revion nodded.

"Well, I've found someone."

Revion looked at his friend, a ghost of the old smile Legolas once knew gracing his face. "Why Legolas, that's terrific! Who is the lucky _elleth_?"

Legolas was silent for a moment, commanding his stomach to stop its flipping. This was so hard…

"Actually, Revion, before I say anything further, there's something I need to tell you. Something I've kept hidden for a long time and I hope you will learn to forgive me for not sharing with you sooner."

Revion looked at his friend in concern. "What is it, _mellon_?" he asked.

Legolas took a deep breath. "I'm not exactly who you think I am…"

_To be continued…_


	12. So Begins a New Life

A/N: Hi everybody! To those who have been following this story regularly, I am _so sorry_ for keeping you waiting this long for an update!! At first I had trouble writing the beginning of this chapter (it took four tries before I got it right!) but as soon as my writer's block left my hard drive crashed and I've had no way of updating before now. The chapter has been done for a while, but this is the first opportunity I've had to type it up and post it. And while I'd love to say everything's smooth sailing from here on out, it may still be a while before I get my computer fixed and I can post every week again. (I am on a friend's computer right now.) So I beg your forgiveness and know that I'm still writing… once I get back I'm sure I'll be updating just as fast as I can transcribe the written page to the computer. You can look forward to that. :) But in the meantime, I still can check my email; keep those comments coming. I love your feedback!

Efia-an

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"I'm not exactly who you think I am…" Legolas's voice trailed off as he struggled to find the words to tell his closest friend his deepest secret, knowing that no matter what happened from this point on their friendship would be forever changed.

"What do you mean, exactly?" asked Revion, puzzlement and patent concern mingling in his expression.

The sound of the crisp, fallen leaves crunching beneath their feet was the only sound in the moment of silence that followed Revion's question. His words seemed to hang upon the air like an unfamiliar scent until Legolas finally spoke, keeping his gaze steadily in front of him and his tone casual.

"Have you not wondered why it is that I never have shown a romantic interest in anyone before now?" Legolas asked.

"I guess I've never really thought about it before," answered Revion.

"Not once?" Legolas asked in mild surprise. "In all the centuries you've known me you've never wondered?"

"No, not really," Revion said, shrugging. "I just figured you just hadn't met the right _elleth_ yet. We all fall in love in our own time. Maybe for some it is early in life, as it was for Raina and me – " His voice choked at the mention of his wife but he continued after only a second's pause. "But for others, like you it would seem, it can take much longer. And some, I suppose, never find love at all."

Legolas contemplated his friend's words for a moment. "It's not entirely true that I never felt any attraction towards another before," he said, "I just never mentioned it before because, well, partly because I knew they didn't feel the same but mostly because I was afraid."

"Afraid of what?" asked Revion. "Being in love can be scary sometimes, yes, but it's the best feeling in the world… what you gain from it far outweighs the fear."

"I was never afraid to love," said Legolas, feeling his heart suddenly jump to his throat in anticipation. "I was afraid to love the wrong person." He stopped walking and turned to face Revion.

"The wrong person?" echoed his friend. "Whatever do you mean?"

"The reason why I never talked about _elleths_ I fancied was because they never attracted me. At first I thought as you, that I simply hadn't met the right one yet. But over time I began to realize that it wasn't simply a matter of timing but that the feelings I did have were for other _ellons_."

"What?" Revion asked, stunned.

"I'm attracted to males, Revion," Legolas reiterated simply.

Revion stared unblinking for a long minute before answering. "I would think you were joking but I know you wouldn't kid about something like this."

"I'm not joking," Legolas answered calmly, wishing his insides would stop their fluttering and echo the surprising steadiness of his voice.

"Are… are you sure?" asked Revion hesitantly.

"Of course I'm sure," answered Legolas a bit more testily than he meant to. He fought back his exasperation before continuing. "It's not like I _chose_ to be this way. I just am what I am."

Revion closed his eyes and leaned back on the ancient oak that towered above them as if trying to gain some strength from it. He remained like that for several moments, his face pale. Legolas watched him silently, nervously, not wanting to disturb his friend. He did not know which he dreaded more: this awful, silent waiting or what Revion might say when he finally broke it.

"How long have you known?" asked Revion, his eyes still closed.

"My first serious love interest was when I was 150."

A pained look crossed Revion's face. "All this time…" he muttered. "Over a millennium you've known and you never told me." His eyes flew open and studied Legolas's face, his own inscrutable.

"No, I haven't," answered Legolas softly.

"Who else knows?" asked Revion tight-lipped.

"Daugion," answered Legolas.

Revion closed his eyes again and leaned his head back against the trunk. "Of course Daugion," he said reflectively. "Anyone else?"

"No one. You're the first to know besides Daugion."

"So why tell me? Why now?"

"I think you know why," answered Legolas. "Or rather, why I haven't told you before now."

Revion nodded. "Your father."

"Yes, my father. If he found out…" Legolas's voice trailed off.

"If he found out, you'd be good as dead," Revion finished for him.

"Yes."

"You still haven't answered my question though. Why me? Why now?"

"I did tell you, earlier," answered Legolas patiently. "I think I've found the one I want to be with for the rest of my life."

Revion did not immediately respond.

"Revion?" Legolas prompted.

"Do you know what sort of trouble you're headed for?" Revion answered.

"I know," Legolas said grimly yet relieved that Revion seemed open to discussion. "At first I kept pushing him away, but he wouldn't let me and finally I gave in. He can be…" Legolas cocked a slight smile at the thought, "very persuasive."

At the tone in his friend's voice Revion finally opened his eyes to peer questioningly at Legolas. Concern battled with amusement inside him at the exposed look of dreaminess on his friend's face. The amusement won out and Revion gave a short bark of a laugh that seemed to startle Legolas back into the present.

"He must be," answered Revion, his amusement fading back into concern, "if you're willing to risk your life for him."

The remainder of the dreamy look slid off Legolas's face. "I know," he said in a pained voice. "I tried to explain to him the extent of Ada's wrath if he were ever to find out, but I don't think he understands, even now."

"You're willing to condemn this _ellon_ to this terrible fate?" asked Revion incredulously.

Legolas groaned in frustration and dismay. ""No! I'm not!" he exclaimed miserably, "Which is why, despite knowing he returned my feelings, I pushed him away. I'd rather see him alive and hale and never be with him than to expose him to the possibility of… well, you know. But he insisted. He's willing to keep our relationship secret. He says he rather live in secrecy, always hiding our true relationship than to live without me. And Revion," he finished passionately, fire dancing in his eyes and voice, "I feel the same way about him. He knows what our life together would be, he accepts it, and I cannot deny him any longer."

Revion peered deeply into Legolas's eyes. "He must really love you," he said.

Legolas nodded, his mouth dry. "Yes, he does. Sometimes I even fear I will never be able to return his love to the same extent he loves me."

"You better be able to," warned Revion with a hint of worry in his voice, "or else you'll both end up miserable." Seeing the hurt in Legolas's face his voice softened. "But if you're willing to throw away the life you have, to face the possibility of your father's retribution should he find out, and end up an outcast disowned by your father and kingdom, well then, I think you do love him enough."

A haunted look floated across Legolas's face. "He'd do it for me. It's the least I can do for him," he said in a hoarse whisper.

Curious now that the initial shock had worn off Revion peered even deeper into Legolas's eyes. "Who is he?" he asked in a friendly voice.

Legolas stared back into his friend's open face, the nerves gone but the relief he had been beginning to feel turning to stone in his stomach. "Haldir," he whispered. "It's Haldir."

"Haldir?" Revion echoed, his eyes widening in shock. "Are you mad?"

Legolas buried his face in his hands. "I know!" his cry coming out muffled, "What am I supposed to do?"

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"What am I supposed to do?" asked Haldir, looking Mithrandir directly in the eye. "You come to me with this news and what, I am obliged to just drop everything and go? I can't _do_ that, Mithrandir! Legolas needs me here!"

"Legolas?" Mithrandir asked sharply. "And here I thought you meant King Thranduil."

Haldir's head snapped up at Mithrandir's tone. "I meant helping Legolas with the reconstruction," he said hurriedly, trying to cover his blunder as best he could.

"Ah! I see. So send your brothers then," Mithrandir advised, a twinkle in his eyes. "It is not an unreasonable request that Galadriel makes of you. Already you have been gone many months longer than she anticipated when she first sent you out."

"I have sent messages to her explaining the situation," stated Haldir a bit coldly.

"Which I'm sure she has appreciated," Mithrandir answered calmly.

Haldir sighed, his defensiveness dropping. "I suppose you're right, of course. As usual."

Mithrandir smiled enigmatically. "Oh. Well. I do what I can," he teased gently.

"Did she have any other message for me?" Haldir asked.

"Only that she wished for your arrival in Lothlórien at your earliest convenience. There is a matter which she wishes to discuss with you."

"I guess there's really no point in sending Orophin and Rúmil without me then," answered Haldir resigned.

"I merely suggested that so she receives word that you would be coming as soon as you're through assisting, as you say, Legolas."

Haldir looked up sharply into the wizard's wise face. "You know," he stated in a mixture of question and accusation.

"Your feelings for Legolas?" asked Mithrandir shrewdly. "I had my suspicions which you were so kind to confirm for me just now."

Haldir let his head sink into his hand. "How did you know?" he asked. "I was so careful."

"Oh, a wizard has his ways," answered Mithrandir with a touch of a smile hovering at his lips. "Of course your brothers were what really caused me to think my suspicions were right."

"My brothers?" replied Haldir bleakly. "I'll strangle them the next chance I get! What did they say to you?"

"Oh don't blame them; they said nothing at all. I just know them, and you, well enough to read what lays unspoken between you all. And of course, I've also had the chance to observe you since being here. But I had my suspicions long before even arriving in Mirkwood."

"How?" asked Haldir, surprised.

"I've known both you and Legolas for many years now," Mithrandir answered. "When I heard you were on your way here I had a hunch you might feel some attraction towards him. Perhaps I should have warned you ere you arrived but by the time I found out, you were almost here. It was too late."

"Warned me about what?" asked Haldir almost defensively.

"That Legolas would draw your attention and to be aware that there would be no future for you with him. He could never return your feelings."

"Why do you say such things?" asked Haldir feeling affronted.

"Because first of all he is unlike you in that he never has expressed any feelings towards another male. And because he knows his duties as a prince of Mirkwood and as his father's son and as much as he has fought this in the past he always obeys the king in the end. Even if he _could_ share your feelings, which he wouldn't, he would never tell you. His sense of loyalty is too great; his pride would win out."

"Really," stated Haldir coolly.

"I'm sorry, Haldir," answered Mithrandir, his features softening in fondness. "I see no future for the two of you. But perhaps it's better this way. At least you find this out now before your feelings have a chance to grow into something serious."

Haldir nodded, his eyes cast downward. "I'm so glad you have such great confidence in me, Mithrandir," he said quietly. "I would think that after all these years you've known me you'd know that I would never act on any feelings for another male unless I knew he returned them. I'm used to disappointment, _mellon-nin_. I'm used to being a minority, always uncertain how people will perceive me because of my preferences. I've learned to adjust. If Legolas didn't return my feelings, it wouldn't be the first time. I thought you knew me well enough to know that about me."

"Do not mistake me, Haldir," Mithrandir replied. "I only wish for your happiness. That is all. I do not mean to belittle your intelligence _or_ your feelings. If I did so I apologize most sincerely."

Haldir looked up and smiled at his friend. "I know you only want what's best for me. Apology accepted."

"So this old wizard is forgiven then?"

"Absolutely," Haldir smiled. Then laying his hand on Mithrandi'r arm he added, "And I am happy, Mithrandir, I am."

"Good," said Mithradir smiling, a look of relief coming to his eyes. "I'm glad to hear it."

"Now that that's settled," said Haldir, changing the subject, "You said there was something else you wanted to speak to me about?"

"That was it, actually," answered Mithrandir. "I came here primarily to help Leoglas with rebuilding his father's kingdom, for news reached my ear of Thranduil's collapse. I had heard rumors that the Wild Men were organizing an assault against Mirkwood. When I heard Legolas had left the kingdom with the army I knew Mirkwood was in imminent danger. King Thranduil's illness was a contemplated thing, well planned to Mirkwood in the hands of an untested ruler. They planned to attack when the kingdom was weakest."

"Cowards," scowled Haldir.

"Indeed," answered Mithrandir. "As soon as I could I left to come here. Since I had been with Lord Celeborn and Lady Galadriel before I left, she asked me to relay her message to you, thereby presenting me the opportunity to speak to you about Legolas."

"What about me?" asked Legolas, strolling into the room with a wide smile on his face.

Mithrandir turned at the sound of Legolas's voice. "Oh, we were just discussing how well you were handling being acting king and now how well you have put together this rather remarkable reconstruction project," he answered.

"I don't know about how well I handled things," said Legolas, his smile gone. "If I hadn't been so eager to prove myself I wouldn't have left on some fool's errand, leaving Mirkwood without a leader or adequate protection."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Legolas," answered Mithrandir. "You did what you thought was best and you're doing a wonderful job now in rebuilding and even improving your kingdom's defenses. I fear that in the times to come they will prove most valuable. You're doing a good thing here."

Legolas shrugged but said nothing. He did not agree with his friend that it was not his fault; he should never have left Mirkwood defenseless like that. But clearly now was not the time to argue such matters.

"Mithrandir's right, _mellon-nin_," said Haldir, knowing full well what Legolas was thinking, "but as I know there's no changing your mind, why don't you instead tell us why you've sought us out."

"Actually," answered Legolas, grateful to Haldir for so tactfully changing the subject, "I just spoke with my father, Mithrandir, and he said he'd like a word with you at your earliest convenience."

"Well!" exclaimed Mithrandir, slapping his thighs as he stood. "Since we are finished here I shall find him at once. By your leave, Haldir, Legolas." Looking at Haldir as he turned to leave he added in an undertone, "Just remember what we discussed."

Haldir nodded and Mithrandir, taking his cue from him, left the room.

"What was that about?" asked Legolas once the door was closed behind the wizard.

"Oh!" laughed Haldir, "He was warning me not to give my heart to you because you wouldn't feel the same about me." Pausing long enough to smile coquettishly at Legolas he added, "Too late!"

Legolas smiled almost sadly at Haldir. "Indeed. Hmm… I wonder why he would say that?"

"He said he had some sort of visceral feeling that I might find you attractive and he didn't want to see me get hurt when you didn't return my feelings."

"You find me attractive?" teased Legolas, snaking his arms around Haldir's lower torso, clasping his hands together as they rested there.

"Extremely," answered Haldir, smiling.

"Why, I think that's about the nicest thing I've ever heard," answered Legolas, "Especially since I think you are kind of pleasant to look at as well!"

"_Kind_ of? _Pleasant_ to look at?" exclaimed Haldir, pushing Legolas's arms away and stepping out of his embrace. "And here I thought you actually _liked_ me. Maybe even loved me."

"Come here, you foolish Elf!" exclaimed Legolas, catching Haldir's wrists in his hands. Bringing them to his lips he kissed first one palm and then the other. "As a matter of fact," he said between kisses, "I think you are about the most handsome being I've ever encountered." Dropping Haldir's wrists he cradled his love's head in his hands. Carefully placing two open kisses on either side of Haldir's mouth he continued. "In fact, not only are you beautiful, but you are the most amazing, wonderful Elf I've ever met and I'm crazy about you."

"Good," answered Haldir in a self-satisfied smirk, "Because I'm absolutely madly in love with you." Grabbing Legolas by the head, he brought his face towards his own and planted a chaste kiss on his lips, which soon turned tender as Legolas explored Haldir's mouth with his own.

All manner of teasing faded away as the two Elves entwined their fingers through the other's hair and their kiss lingered. It was not a hot, passionate kiss as many of theirs were but rather one of utmost tenderness and gentleness. When they broke apart, the looked into each other's eyes and smiled.

"I'm glad you managed to send Mithrandir off," said Haldir. "There is something I need to talk to you about. But first, did you talk to Revion?"

"Yes," answered Legolas.

"And?" asked Haldir, nervous and excited all in one.

"And it went better than I expected it would."

Haldir let out a small whoop. "That's wonderful!" he cried. "Tell me all about it!"

"Revion truly is an amazing friend," answered Legolas thoughtfully," He had every reason to hate me or be upset with me. But instead he understood and even accepted me. Honestly, he is one of the most gracious Elves I know."

"I'm so glad!" Haldir exclaimed.

"Yes," answered Legolas absently. "I also hope you don't mind, but I told him it was you I was in love with."

"Why should I mind?" asked Haldir, a vaguely puzzled look on his face.

"I know we were going to ask him together for his blessing. I didn't know if you wanted to tell him about our relationship together as well."

"Oh. Well maybe, but this worked out just fine. Now he knows and perhaps it will come as less of a shock now when we ask for his blessing for our marriage," answered Haldir.

Legolas remained silent for a moment, his eyes focused on his fidgeting hands.

"Leoglas?" asked Haldir with concern in his voice, "Are you all right?"

"Yes, of course," answered Legolas distractedly. Then, "Haldir, do you still want to go through with this marriage?"

Haldir jerked away. "What do you mean?" he asked, his throat dry, "What kind of question is that?"

"I'm just checking," answered Legolas carefully. "I just need to be sure that you haven't changed your mind now that you've had some time to think about it. After all, we did sort of jump into a snap decision. We barely know each other and we've had no courtship whatsoever. We went from being friends to being betrothed all in one day. I just need to know that we're doing the right thing."

Haldir was silent as he fought the tightness in his throat before he could speak. "Are you kidding me with this?" he choked out, his voice cracking with emotion.

"No, I'm not," answered Legolas, finally looking Haldir in the eye. Seeing the raw hurt there, the disbelief and pain written clearly across Haldir's face he gently took Haldir by the shoulders. "I just need to know that you love me enough to go through with this. Marrying me might end up being one of the hardest things you ever do. I don't want to cause you any more heartache than I already have and I fear that some day your love would grow to resentment, which would eventually turn to hatred because I will never be free to share openly our marriage. And I can't bear that thought.

"If we go through with this, we won't ever be able to express our love in front of people. Ever. We won't be able to share our own house much less a bedchamber. It would mean spending the rest of our lives sneaking about, waiting for stolen moments to spend together out of the way of prying eyes. It means if one of us gets hurt the other can't show how deeply we feel about it.

"And if nothing else, think about this: How are we to live in a marriage when you are just visiting Mirkwood? How would we explain why you never go home or why I'm never here but in Lothlórien? I cannot abandon my people any more than you should abandon your home just for me. But if one of us doesn't leave home, we'll never see each other and then what's the point?

"Can you live like that? Beyond the risks of having my father find out and the repercussions thereafter, can you honestly say you want to live like that?"

Haldir continued to study Legolas's eyes for a long moment after Legolas finished his speech. He contemplated his beloved's words silently, realizing that Legolas was right; he had not thought about much of what Legolas had said.

Sensing Haldir's thought Legolas interjected softly, "It's not too late to change your mind. No one besides us knows of our betrothal yet so nothing is official."

Hurt flooded through Haldir like a rushing stream of snow-melt in the mountains, numbing him on the inside. A solitary tear escaped his carefully rigid face. "I want to marry you, Legolas," he said, his voice so low even Legolas almost could not hear him, "but you're right. I don't want to live my life like that. I understand what it would mean to live in a secret marriage, but that is without the complications of being from two different lands and having one of us be the prince and sole heir to a kingdom."

"What are you saying then?" asked Legolas nervously.

"I don't know what I'm saying, exactly," answered Haldir, "I just know that I love you and I don't think I can leave you and go on with my life, pretending I don't desperately miss you, need you, or that this never happened between us. I can't do that, Legolas. I think the grief would nearly kill me. I _know_ we've only just met, but as you say, our souls have touched and I know you're the only one I can ever love again. An eternity without you is a very long time."

"But an eternity of hiding our love? Is it any better?" asked Legolas gently.

Haldir shook his head. "I don't know."

"I don't know either," answered Legolas sadly, "and we need to be certain if we are to marry." Seeing the expression on Haldir's face he smiled slightly. "Yes, _meleth-nin_, I will still marry you if you want me to. I made a promise to you and I will not break it unless you want me to."

"I don't want you to," whispered Haldir.

A wave of sadness crashed over Legolas. "Okay then. We're still betrothed. But this doesn't have to be a decision we need to make tonight. If, after thinking about it, you change your mind, just let me know. I won't force you into anything you don't want, okay?"

"Okay," Haldir nodded.

Once again silence enveloped the room. Shadows were beginning to fall, throwing a dusky relief over the room. Outside an evening lark began to sing. Finally Legolas broke the silence.

"You had something you needed to tell me?" he asked.

"Oh, right," Haldir answered, breaking out of his thoughts. "The reason Mithrandir had sought me out just now was to give me a message. Lady Galadriel is requesting me to come home as soon as is convenient."

Legolas let out a short, humorless laugh. "If it's not one thing it's another, right?"

Haldir smiled wryly. "I guess so."

Legolas thought for a moment. "Maybe this is a good thing," he said finally.

"How so?" asked Haldir.

"Well, first of all, it gives you some time to discuss things with your brothers as you travel home. But it will also give us some time to think about things and get a feel for what it would be like to have to separate for an undetermined amount of time."

Haldir sighed. "It feels like we're being robbed of our time together, though," he answered. "Time to get to know each other and to be together. The beginning of a betrothal is supposed to be a happy time, a time meant to be enjoyed and celebrated. We'll never have this time again!"

"Why Haldir!" exclaimed Legolas surprised, a smile on his lips, "You're a romantic!"

Haldir smiled, relaxing. "Yes, I suppose deep down I am."

"I like this less practical side of you!" exclaimed Legolas.

"It's not a side that surfaces very often, I'm afraid," said Haldir.

"Maybe that's what makes it so delightful," Legolas responded.

"See?" demanded Haldir, his mood changing abruptly, "See? This is what we'll be missing if I go! The chance to explore and learn new things about each other!"

Legolas's face sobered. "Yes, but our life together will never be easy for any real length of time. We both know it. Sooner or later we'll have to deal with this reality and there's no excusable reason to delay your return home any longer. Both you and my father are well, the land is at peace once again (or at least as at peace as it ever is), and three less sets of hands won't make much difference in the reconstruction. It's time for you to return home."

_But you are my home!_ Haldir thought argumentatively. Aloud he sighed. "I suppose you're right," he said sadly, contemplatively.

Legolas kissed the tip of Haldir's nose. "I'll be right here waiting for you when you get back," he said.

"_If_ I get back," muttered Haldir morosely.

"_When_ you get back," stated Legolas firmly, looking Haldir directly in the eyes. "This isn't good-bye. It's just 'until we meet again'."

"Until we meet again," said Haldir thoughtfully. "Yes, _meleth-nin­_, until we meet again."

To be continued… 


	13. Heartache

A/N: Oh good gracious! I am so sorry to keep you waiting so long for an update. For those of you still with me, THANK YOU!! I appreciate your patience. My computer's still being worked on, but I hopefully will have access to another computer on a weekly basis for the next month or so, so updates should be regular until the completion of Part One here (the story definitely has two (or maybe even three, depending on how it plays out) parts to it). We're getting there:)

Please note that this story is rated M for m/m sexual references. I mention it again here because if you're offended by this, this would be a good chapter to skip. ;)

Also, since it has been absolutely forever since I updated, let me review for you what's happened so far so that you don't have to backtrack to figure out what's going on. If you'll recall, Haldir and Legolas got themselves engaged in the passion of a moment thanks to some extreme gratefulness that they both lived through a battle with Orc and Smaug. But because of Thranduil's terrible homophobia, they have decided to keep it a secret, sharing their romance only with Haldir's two brothers and Revion, a close friend to Legolas (whom they hope to eventually gain consent from in order to marry). But suddenly Gandalf shows up with a message to Haldir that Galadriel needs him as soon as possible so Haldir's visit to Mirkwood ends abruptly. Legolas and Haldir agree to put their relationship on hold, staying true to one another, until they can meet again and decide if a married life lived in secret and spent largely apart from one another is something Haldir is truly willing and wanting to do. Oh, and as a side note, remember too that Haldir spent some time asleep under the powers of the Enchanted River where he dreamed a lifetime had already been spent married to Legolas. And now to chapter 13…

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At first the months since Haldir last saw Legolas flew by. Between the journey home with his two brothers and the time spent with the Lord and Lady of the Wood in council after their return, Haldir's days were filled, leaving him little time to think about his separation from Legolas. Entire days could pass without his notice, for as much as he had not wanted to leave Mirkwood (which during his stay there he began to feel almost as at home there as he did in Lothlórien), returning to the mallorn trees he knew and loved filled him with unspeakable joy. While away he had not missed them; indeed he had scarcely thought about them. And though he and his brothers had only been gone little more than a year – a stain of breath upon a glass – so much had occurred during that time that Haldir found himself feeling older and slightly foreign in his homeland. Nevertheless he was glad to be surrounded by familiar friends.

But once the flurry and excitement of homecoming wore off more and more Haldir began finding his mind wandering back to a time not so very long ago (and yet somehow impossibly distant) when he and Legolas were together. Hours he could spend in the company of his thoughts, not of falling in love with Legolas as many dreamers will, but of the inflections of Legolas's voice with its slightly northern accent, the way sunlight seemed to be caught in his hair and linger there long after the sun disappeared, or the way Legolas's eyes shone and danced with merriment when he was amused.

Haldir also thought back to the difficult times as well: his fight with Legolas before they became lovers, the battle with the orcs, the look on Legolas's face when they returned to find his kingdom razed and his subjects brutalized and dead. He thought on all these things for these were the only real memories he had and all became precious in the uncertainty of the unknowable future.

The one thing he tried not to think about (besides the inevitable wondering when he would next see his betrothed) was the lifetime that had passed during those four days he was asleep and experienced the painful rebirth into the life of joy he knew stemmed from having spent a lifetime already with Legolas. While brutally vivid in his mind's eye, they were (alas!) only dreams.

No, Haldir tried desperately not to think about those dreams at all. It did not do well to recall the intangible stuff of dreams, no matter how real they seem. They were not reality, as Haldir kept reminding himself over and over again. In reality he and Legolas barely knew each other and had only been together for two months. What sort of time is that to an Elf? It was nothing at all; a blink of an eye or the beat of the heart. No indeed… Haldir tired not to recall his dreams of joy, of Legolas, at all because he did not want to confuse the two.

But sadly he failed and failed miserably. The more time that separated him from Legolas the more Haldir found himself back in those dreams until he began to wonder if the time he had spent with Legolas in real life was but a dream or even a dream within that dream. If it wasn't for the fact his brothers had experienced life in Mirkwood as well Haldir feared that part of his life had not happened at all.

The months turned into a year and the year turned into two and then ten and still Haldir's thoughts lingered on those few fleeting weeks he had known with Legolas. He spoke often with Rúmil and Orophin about the state of his heart and found comfort in the letters he and Legolas exchanged. Even though they dare not write openly of their feelings for one another lest one of their letters fall into the wrong hands, Haldir knew Legolas still cared and remained true to his promise that he would marry Haldir some day, or, at Haldir's request, Legolas would not force Haldir into marriage if he had a change of heart.

But Haldir knew he would never have a change of heart. Although over a decade had passed and life had pretty much returned to the way things were before he met Legolas, Legolas still held his heart and always would.

"_Do you remember the last time we saw each other alone, _meleth-nin_?"_ an echo of Legolas's voice floated across Haldir's mind.

"_Of course I do," _Haldir answered him. _"It was in the glen where the willows bent low to kiss the waters. I promised…"_

Well, Haldir had promised a lot of things that afternoon. But the most important promises made to each other were the ones left unsaid.

Smiling, Haldir closed his eyes and allowed himself the luxury of thinking back to those precious, fleeting hours in which they had said their goodbyes. It was a time Haldir returned to seldom; it was far too intimate, too special to taint with false memory or fantasy. But on this day so like that other day not so very long ago, Haldir loosened the shackles guarding the treasured memory and relaxed into the past.

_It was an unusually warm day for that time of year in the north. The sun beat down brightly upon the earth, warming even the damp soil beneath the fallen leaves. Indeed, it might have been too warm for some were it not for a gentle cooling breeze that came through. As such, it was a perfect day._

_Haldir, like most of the Elves in the woodland realm, was outside enjoying the fair weather when Leoglas found him._

"_Ah, Haldir!" Legolas announced regally and a bit too loudly upon finding him in the company of others, "I was just looking for you. I don't mean to pry you away from your excellent companions here, but I was hoping I could speak to you regarding a few last minute things before you head back tomorrow."_

_Haldir smiled. "Of course, _Prince_," he answered, emphasizing the title. Nodding to Gondien and the others with them he added, "If you don't mind."_

"_Not at all!" exclaimed Gondien good-naturedly. "We'll catch up with you tonight at the farewell banquet."_

"_I look forward to it, _mellon-nin_," answered Haldir, smiling. Then taking his leave of them he turned to Legolas. "What can I do for you?"_

"_Come with me," Legolas answered._

"_Of course," Haldir said, following his beloved away from the crowds out enjoying the fine weather._

_Once they were out of earshot of anyone who might be listening, Legolas leaned in and under his breath murmured, "Prince?"_

_Haldir smirked. "Well, you were the one acting all formal to begin with."_

_Legolas cast his eyes downward. "I deserved that, I guess," he said._

"_Yes you did," Haldir agreed. He paused. "So where are you taking me anyway?"_

"_Into the forest," answered Legolas. "I want you all to myself for the rest of the day."_

"_Not that I don't adore being alone with you," Haldir said, "but the whole afternoon? There are things to attend to! You have your duties and I still need to finish readying for our journey home. We can't be selfish here, no matter how much you tempt me."_

_Legolas stopped walking. "You know, sometimes I don't like this more practical side of you," he said, grabbing Haldir's hand. "Don't worry about a thing. I already arranged it with my _adar_ that I should take the time to help you and your brothers prepare to leave and to farewell you. After all, you got to know me a lot better than him. And Rúmil and Orophin have gladly conspired with me to take care of things themselves so that I might steal you away. We're free for the rest of the day."_

"_But wouldn't your father be suspicious?" asked Haldir worriedly._

_Legolas laughed. "My father? No! Why should he be? As far as he knows, I am attracted to _elleths_ only. Never in his wildest imaginings would he think his son loved another _ellon_ and was sneaking off to be alone with him." Glancing around to ensure no one was around to see them Legolas leaned in and kissed Haldir tenderly. "You worry too much, _meleth_."_

"_Do I?" asked Haldir, closing his eyes and savoring the taste of Legolas._

"_Mm-hmm," Legolas confirmed as he embraced his betrothed._

"_Oh." Haldir's answer came as a sigh._

"_Just let yourself go," said Legolas seductively. "For just this day cast aside all your concerns and be with me."_

_Haldir cradled Legolas's face in his hands and studied his shockingly blue-grey eyes intently. For a moment he lingered there, reading the depths of emotion Legolas was pouring into that gaze. All time and space fell away and Haldir forgot everything else around him except the beautiful one before him._

_Neither Elf spoke as the world suspended. Then a bird twittered, breaking the silence, the herald of pleasant sweetness to come._

"_Come, I want to show you something," Legolas said, taking Haldir's hand and pulling him deeper into the wood._

"_Where are we going?" asked Haldir, his curiosity rising._

"_You'll see when we get there. Come on."_

_After an hour of walking silently hand in hand Haldir laughed gently, disturbing the silence once more._

"_What?" asked Legolas with a smile._

"_Nothing," answered Haldir with a smile of his own, "I just figured we'd be there by now. How far is it?"_

_Legolas smiled enigmatically. "Isn't it enough to be out walking together on this beautiful day, not having any eyes watching us? For today we're free to just _be._ Isn't that enough?"_

"_Of course, _meleth_," answered Haldir, raising their enjoined hands to kiss Legolas's. "But you implied an end destination."_

"_Did I?" teased Legolas gently. "I don't remember making any promises."_

"_You said you had something to show me."_

"_So I did," recanted Legolas, "And to answer your question, it's just a bit further."_

"_Lead on then, my fair prince," Haldir prompted._

_After a few minutes more Legolas bent low and crept through a hidden opening in an overgrown thicket. Leading Haldir by the hand he pulled his husband-to-be in after him. Straightening, Haldir looked up. His breath caught in his chest._

"_What _is_ this place?" he asked in hushed awe._

"_Legolas smiled softly. "Do you like it?"_

"_I _love_ it!" exclaimed Haldir._

"_This is my sanctuary, my haven," answered Legolas. "I discovered it as a young _ellon_ one day as I was avoiding my lessons. I kept going deeper and deeper into the trees until I found this secret place. I claimed it as my own private retreat. Since then I've come here when I most need to get away and be alone. You're the first one I've ever showed it to."_

_Haldir looked around in awe. Behind him were the brambles that hid from view the cove they were now standing in. While the forest was dark and overrun on the other side, here sunlight streamed down, allowing the wall behind them to be curtained with small late-blooming white and lavender flowers. Along their left a creek ran smoothly until about halfway down where it formed a slight cascade. The waters danced merrily down the rock surface until it landed in a musical splash in a crystalline pool. There the waters were so crisp and clear that the sunlight caught each ripple and broke upon the surface into a thousand sparks of light. Once past the eddies the water stilled and majestic willow ancient and wise bent low over the water, their branches brushing the surface._

_To their right, stately lodgepole pines grew tall and overshadowed the grounds beneath them, the space there carpeted with brown needles and small shade-loving bushes. But before them lay a valley richly bathed in vibrantly green grasses that rippled with the breeze. Rolling mounds of earth beneath the grass gave the appearance that the ground itself was alive and breathing._

_For all that it was a small space, a sacred space full of such beauty Haldir would never have suspected it could exist in the shadows of Mirkwood. A space completely concealed from the dangers of the outside world; a safe, protected place. He could see why Legolas came here. And why he had kept it all to himself._

_Except now Legolas was sharing it with him. Haldir was dazed, struck momentarily speechless as he contemplated both the beauty before him and the gift Legolas had just shared with him._

_For long moments they stood, hands entwined, soaking up the glory of the glen, each one lost in their own thoughts. While Haldir took in the beauty before him, he was aware of Legolas's gaze upon him, studying his face for the flicker of emotion that played there._

"_Why?" asked Haldir finally, a catch in his voice. "Why do you share this with me?"_

"_Because it is my secret place, _meleth_," said Legolas, his words a caress. "Our lives shall be filled with many secrets from here on out, should you still choose to bond with me. Many of these will feel dark and will be a sort of bondage. But here we can be free to meet and love. When times are the hardest to bear, we will always have this place, this time to return to. Here is where I feel most alive. I cannot bear the thought of you leaving here tomorrow without sharing this place with you. You've already given me so much and will be sacrificing so much for me in the future… this is all I have to offer you in exchange, Haldir."_

"_It is a wonderful gift," said Haldir, kissing him. "Thank you."_

_They kissed again. "No, Haldir, thank _you_. For opening my heart to the possibility of love. That is a far greater gift."_

"_Anytime, my love," answered Haldir, smiling against Legolas's lips, "Anytime."_

"_I'm glad you came with me today," whispered Legolas._

"_I'd follow you to the ends of Arda and beyond," said Haldir. "You only have to name what I can do for you and I'll do it."_

"_Then kiss me," said Legolas._

_Haldir did as he was told, placing feather-light kisses in Legolas's ear, on his neck, his eyes, his nose, and either side of his mouth. Legolas groaned._

"_What is it, _meleth?_" whispered Haldir._

"_You tease me," said Legolas, his eyes closed. "Please…"_

_He did not have to finish the thought as Haldir claimed his lips with his own. Fire swept through his body at the contact and he hungered for an even greater intimacy with his beloved. Firmly, resolutely, he pressed harder against Legolas's lips, causing them to open and give Haldir full access to his sweet mouth. Tongues dueling, they let each other know how desperately they wanted one another until each was left breathless in the wake of such heat._

"_Let me love you," gasped Haldir desperately. "Let me worship you today and forever. I pledge my life to you and you only for as long as I draw breath. Just say you'll be mine. Please, always be mine."_

"_I am yours, for as long as you want me," answered Legolas, heatedly pressing another kiss against Haldir's mouth._

"_I will want you forever," Haldir answered as his hands explored Legolas's body. "Forever and always until the end of my days."_

_No other words were exchanged in the next few minutes as the two Elves undressed each other in a flurry of passionate activity. Their lips locked again as Haldir pressed Legolas firmly against the strong back of the willows, their hands roaming anxiously over one another's bodies._

"_You are so beautiful, so perfect," whispered Haldir, his heart swelling and overflowing with love for Legolas. "Let me see you, all of you, now. Let me drink in the sight of you so it may be branded on my memory to keep me company in the lonely nights to come."_

_Obligingly Legolas opened his arms allowing Haldir to step back and study him. The sight of the milky white skin in its soft Elvish glow nearly sent Haldir over the edge. "I love you, whole-heartedly. What have I done to deserve you as my mate?"_

_Legolas offered a slight smile that only served to enhance his allure. "Nothing at all. It is divine grace. For I certainly have done nothing to have an Elf like you willing to devote himself completely and unquestioningly to me. I never dreamed this could happen in my life. If it's not a gift of grace from above then surely I must be dreaming and I shall awake to find you gone."_

"_Never gone, beloved," Haldir answered, stepping forward to claim Legolas's lips again. "Just a bit removed. Time will bring us together again."_

_Legolas sighed in mild frustration. "Don't let's talk about the future. We have today. Let us live for this moment."_

"_You have but to ask," whispered Haldir, "I am yours."_

_Slowly but insistently Legolas pushed Haldir back, allowing Haldir to wrap his arms around his betrothed. He sighed in contentment as Haldir's hands wandered over his flesh, cupping his bottom in his hands. Haldir squeezed gently, drawing Legolas's arousal to his own, the contact there almost painful in its perfect pleasure._

"_We must not bond yet," whispered Legolas urgently, "no matter what our bodies want. We may have an atypical marriage, but I still want to do things properly. Please grant me this request so that we may not live the coming years in regret."_

"_I love you too much to shame you, Legolas," answered Haldir seriously. "But I do not deny that I want you desperately. We can still enjoy each other now without bonding and I promise that should either of us become too aroused to withstand, we'll both jump in the water together and cool off."_

_Legolas smiled at the humor in Haldir's voice. "Okay," he whispered._

_That was all Haldir needed to hear. Bearing Legolas softly to the ground, he allowed his mouth to explore the expanse of Legolas's smooth chest, savoring the flavor of him. He allowed his tongue the pleasure of circling first one nipple and then the other. As Legolas arched beneath him in pleasure, Haldir accepted his invitation to drop his mouth even lower, allowing his lips to lovingly caress Legolas's throbbing member. A soft cry came from Legolas at the intimate contact and Haldir brought his mouth to Legolas's in a fiery kiss._

"_Don't stop," Legolas gasped as Haldir broke the contact._

"_Never, _meleth,_" answered Haldir before he returned his ministrations to Legolas's most private place. Slowly he worked his mouth over the entire area, causing Legolas to writhe in ecstasy._

"_I… can't… hold… on…" gasped Legolas desperately._

"_Then don't," advised Haldir, loving the warmth spreading over his own body. "Let yourself go."_

_As Legolas cried out his pleasure, Haldir returned his mouth to Legolas's ear, caressing the pointed tip lovingly with his tongue. "What you feel now, Legolas, is only a fraction of what I feel inside me every time I think of you."_

_Legolas tilted his head to look at Haldir in amazement. "Surely not," he said earnestly._

"_It is. One day when we bond you will know the depths of truth of my words. I love you so entirely that one of our lifetimes is not enough to show how much I care. You excite me beyond words. This is the only way I can show you how much."_

_Legolas smiled and pushed Haldir. As he did so he rolled so that he now was on top. "You say so now only because you have not experienced it for yourself yet," said Legolas with a gleam in his eye. "I fully intend on making sure you never underestimate the power of what you just did to me."_

_Not allowing Haldir a chance to contradict him further, Legolas pressed his lips against Haldir's in a bruising kiss. As Haldir had worked his way down Legolas's body moments before, so now did Legolas, mimicking every movement Haldir had just done to him. As Haldir reached his own climax he shouted out Legolas's name, wanting to experience the moment in every way._

"_There now," said Legolas smugly, "Now you have tasted your own medicine."_

"_A pleasure too heady for words," gasped Haldir, trying to regain a sense of calm and control he ordinarily possessed. "I cannot imagine how it will be to truly bond with you. Such a gift is greater than any burden we may have in keeping our own."_

"_Then let's not think of the burden but only the pleasure," answered Legolas, pressing a kiss against Haldir's lips._

"_An excellent suggestion," answered Haldir, surrendering himself to the other Elf. "I could lay in your arms for all the rest of my days."_

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_After a full afternoon of exploring each other's bodies in every possible way, Legolas and Haldir sat contentedly in each others arms, leaning against the willow to support their spent bodies. The breeze that had been playing across their bodies all day was suddenly gone and in the silence of the next few minutes Haldir could hear a chorus of sounds from the forest: the dancing water, birds chirping, insects singing. But above all these sounds most dear to him was the sound of Legolas's beating heart._

"_It beats only for you, _meleth-nin,_" whispered Legolas. "Now am I glad I brought you here."_

_Haldir sat upright, feigning hurt over Legolas's words. "Only _now_ are you glad you brought me here? What, you weren't sure before?"_

_Legolas gave Haldir an exasperated look. "You fickle Elf!" he exclaimed, trying to draw Haldir back into his arms. When he failed, Legolas let out an exaggerated sigh. "Let me put it this way. I was excited before to show you this place… and now I'm _glad_ I did."_

_Haldir gave Legolas a suspicious look before settling happily back into Legolas's waiting arms. "I'm glad too," he said, nestling his head against Legolas's chest._

"_Never before could I have imagined finding deeper joy in this place than I already had," explained Legolas. "But nothing compares to the joy of sharing this with the one being who has somehow become the most important person in my life. Now my joy in this place is complete because it is now in you as well."_

"_I love it. I love you, Legolas, and always will."_

"_I love you, Haldir. Together we will see our dreams come true."_

"Haldir!" A voice calling his name broke through Haldir's happy memories.

Momentarily confused, Haldir looked around for the source of the voice, getting ready to do battle with whomever it was who dared disturb him in this happiest of daydreams.

"What!" demanded Haldir crossly as he saw his brother Orophin coming towards him. "This had better be good."

"Dreaming of Legolas again, were you?" Orophin smirked, not remotely disturbed by the warning tone in Haldir's voice.

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes," snapped Haldir. "So what is it that you want?"

Orophin grinned. "What if it was just the pleasure of your most excellent company?"

Haldir felt like punching him. Instead he settled for a glare. "You had better have a better have a good reason, or else I'll—"

"Ooh, touchy touchy!" crooned Orophin, not remotely concerned. "Someone's in a mood today!"

Haldir sighed and slumped against the tree he had been leaning against. "Sorry Orophin," he said in a dejected tone. "It's just that I miss him so much sometimes it's almost a physical pain. I don't know how to live like this, not knowing when I'll see him next or for how long."

"I know," said Orophin in an uncharacteristic moment of sympathy. "But is it worth all this heartache you're causing yourself? It's been nearly fifteen years since last you saw him and yet you pine away after him. I hate to see you so unhappy."

"I'd be even more unhappy knowing I'd never be with him again," said Haldir miserably. "That's the irony of it all. You'd think that after all these years apart a brief two month fling would seem like nothing anymore, but every day that passes without him becomes more of a torment. I live for when I'll see him again. Without that hope… I think I would perish."

Orophin looked at his brother with such pity in his eyes that it was fortunate for him Haldir's gaze was cast downward. If there was one thing Haldir truly could not stand it was pity. But recently Orophin and Rúmil could not help but pity him, so dejected had he become.

Leaning forward Orophin placed a brotherly kiss on Haldir's brow. "Don't worry, Haldir. Some day you will have your happy ending. I know it."

Haldir looked miserably up at his brother. "How can you sound so sure? Nothing in life is a guarantee."

"Because you need hope. This too shall pass. It is a fleeting thing, despair." Orophin sighed in sympathy. "We are creatures of light, Haldir. Don't let the darkness overwhelm you."

Haldir let his head hang in response. Gathering his brother into his arms, Orophin cradled him tenderly, wishing with all his heart there was something more he could do.

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"He's not improving," said Orophin later that evening to Galadriel. "I fear for him, for his health. He's not the same person he was before."

Galadriel nodded in concern. "I, too, am worried. Lately when I look into his heart I see a great deal of darkness. Perhaps it is time to send for Mithrandir. Maybe he can find a way to bring a light back into Haldir's eyes and heart."

"How?"

"I foresee a great change on the horizon," answered Galadriel. "Something that will bring Haldir some comfort and joy. Although I cannot yet see what it is I know Mithrandir plays some part in it. Send for him and in the meantime I shall speak with your brother. Perhaps I can learn what the cause of his heartache is."

"The cause of his heartache is clear, my Lady," Rúmil chimed in. "He longs for his true love, Legolas of Mirkwood. But he cannot see past his own loneliness right now to think that he will see him again."

Galadriel was silent for a moment. "Yes, I thought it might be this," she said softly, almost to herself. "Haldir and I spoke long when he arrived in Lothlórien about what had happened between Legolas and him."

But what was spoken between Haldir and Galadriel Rúmil and Orophin never learned. Instead Galadriel turned her thoughts inward as she silently paced the talan. Suddenly she stopped and looked up.

"Do not let your hearts be filled with fear for Haldir any longer. Send for Mithrandir to come at once and send for Haldir to come and see me. Together we will get past this thing. Haldir will know joy again."

"Yes, my Lady," answered Rúmil and Orophin in chorus. Recognizing their dismissal they bowed slightly and went off to find their brother, their hearts lighter and their hope renewed.


End file.
